frustrating expectations

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I like my job 90% of the time, it suits me quite well. However, this past November we put in a new system and somehow I became the person to implement it. The computer aspect was difficult, but I have done that, maintained it, chased problems - but that as it turns out was the easy part. Its the people aspect that is getting to me. I have worked through people with computer phobias, people who don't like change, people who are off site who needed to be set up (in homes reeking of cigarette smoke, having their computer crash on me, and then having that individual end up in the hospital so we couldn't use the remote station for a month anyway, argh) , I have worked saturdays, I have worked late nights, I have been yelled at, ignored, avoided, otherwise straight out emotionally abused, and have ended up in tears on more than one occasion (to the point where one boss is sure I will burst into tears at any moment, and the office manager has been giving me buy off gifts for my work on the systems to make sure that I don't go find a less hostile environment to work in).

Now, after 9 months of work, I have 75% of the office on this system. One person, who I think if isn't an aspie, has some very aspie traits, has been eluding me. He is a sweet person, but when he is at work I really don't know how far I can go with him, how far I can push him and quite frankly I would have to bully him a bit, which I don't want to do (plus he is higher up than I am, which means I am effectively trying to push a boss into doing something he isn't interested in doing). He is a procrastinator and has that expert avoidance software that we seem to develop over time, and he doesn't come out to talk to anyone unless there is no other option. My only option right now is appealing to his wife.

Oddly, he isn't even the real problem. Its the other boss, who wanted the system originally, and doesn't know what the problem is in getting everyone on board and apparently that is my fault. I have been avoiding him because I know he will want to know if I have everyone on board, and every time I try to explain why they aren't, to him it just sounds like I am making excuses for my "failure". That I have 75% of the office staff that needs to use the system is of little consequence, it is that above 25% that I have to turn. My biggest frustration is I can't explain WHY it is so hard to get the above individual to try the new system, not without outing myself in the process (and I have no formal diagnosis so that is shaky ground) and then accusing someone else of aspie traits without having any medical background to actually say for sure. Now the initiating boss is wondering if the aspie-ish boss would prefer to use a different technology. This is so not the problem - its not the type of technology that is the issue, its using the existing one. I told this boss that it wasn't worth my sanity to try to get the other boss to use a second technology, when I don't know how to get him to use the first. The technology isn't that difficult to use, but it is the change that is difficult. Its not like the initiating boss hasn't had his problems getting the aspie-ish boss to get on board (he tried to show this man how to use the technology one evening, but when he turned around the aspie-ish boss had actually slipped out and had gone home) , but he has a blind spot when it comes to my abilities. Nice that he has such a high opinion of me, I suppose, but it is certainly wearing down my patience with him. He is normally a very sweet person, so it is hard to drain the stress of it all by calling him an appropriately nasty name, sigh. It would be a lot easier if he were a jerk, oddly enough.

I guess I am going to have to put the heat up on the aspie-ish boss - his wife really is my only option I suppose, sigh. Beyond that, I don't know what I am going to be able to do, beyond this little rant I have going today. Happily I am on vacation for a few days, I can at least pull back and regroup, anyway.

Thanks for "listening"....

Good luck