Opinions and advice Please

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I originally posted this in ther introduction section of WP but perhaps it will do me more good in tyhis section Please excuse the cross post.

I actually have done a few of the questionaires and our son seems to fit about 90% of the criteria for AS.
As for my post not having much in it you are correct. I'm not entirely sure how to go about describing our son here, I am afraid that in our frustration we would be assigning traits that may only be our perceptions instead of actual problems HE has. That was the reason for asking for help in finding the right Questions to ask.
I will try to describe his actions in the most basic sense so that you might gain a better picture. He seems to have absolutley no concept of conscience he seems not to care a wit for how what he does or says affects other's he cannot seem to carry on a conversation for more than a moment before he runs off on a tangent that is either totally irrelavant or misses the POINT of the conversation focusing totally on the details. He seems not to be able to carry out simple commands or to attend his daily chores without a meltdown be it minor or major depending on the day.Questions of any sort seem to send him over the edge. His interest in a givin subject runs to obbsession for a short period of time and then basically dissapears, but he also sticks to ONE interest inncessantly (cars) and can qoute unnending statistics for every vehicle you can think of while not having any real understanding of what those statistics mean. His memory for the short term seems almost nonexistent while he can spout off about things yrs ago noone else can recall.Humor totaly escapes him as he takes everything so literally but he thinks he is funny (he is not).
In General he is a 15 yr old young man who perpetually acts like a 5 yr old (ALMOST lterally).

I would suggest getting him evaluated by someone with relevant specialized training (i.e. a clinical developmental psychologist). I would not recommend simply asking a pediatrician. Many pediatricians know little about autism and, worse, often don't KNOW how little they know. (The same can be said of some psychologists, but your odds are much better, especially if you find someone that has a great deal of experience with autism/AS).

Ty Rudolfsdad,

he has been diagnosed with adhd, bipolar disorder, and ODD.
Meds givin to him for these diagnosed problems only seem to make matters worse or at the very least dont change anything.
His very Nasty behavior presents itself mostly at home but his social and maturity levels fall alarmingly short for his age.He doesnt seem to care about anything or anyone other than himself and when confronted with day to day living simply says over and over like a Mantra " I cannot do this".
He has (until a yr ago) been in some sort of therapy or other since tthe age of 6 one therapist insists that AS is the cause of his differences but poorly givin Phsyc evals have failed to support her and therefore treatment cannot or has not been followed through for AS.
he seems to get worse everyday and we don't have a clue what to do.

Get him off the meds, start reading a lot of parenting books for teen boys, and get in family counseling.

He has been off his meds for almost a yr already. family counseling did no good whatsoever(several yrs worth of no good) and regular parenting books have proven useless in this case.

My advice is to get him involved in a teen AS support group. Target only one behavior at a time. To address them all his overwhelming.

I would not target obsessive behavior or stimming (if he does that) at all because we need these things to preserve a sense of neurological balance.

Give him plenty of time alone to decompress from his day or from being around people. This reduces the chance of meltdowns.

I say this as a 40 year adult with Asperger's, ADD and bipolar.

You can work from the assumption he may be AS even if you can't get someone to give the diagnosis, then see how the change in approach helps (or does not help) things. One thing that has me thinking you may be right is that AS is often misdiagnosed as ADD, but while ADD is internal and benefited by meds, most AS focusing issues are sensory or interest related and not benefited by meds.

Look first for sensory triggers. AS are often sensitive to small things the rest of us don't notice. A cleaning fluid used during chores could trip him, for example. Watch, discuss, then mitigate by removing the offender.

Consider stress. Many AS stress more easily and need extra personal time doing things that may seem odd to us, but that help them self-calm and feel centered. Pacing, trampolines, and similar repititve physical behaviors are common, as are stims like chewing or touching. If he once had these behaviors and was taught to supress them, consider re-introducing something relatively socially acceptable like a trampoline and seeing if it helps him self-regulate. I can't begin to tell you how much difference it made to my son's life when we stopped trying to keep him from pacing (during which he bangs into furniture and walls) and decided to allow it, no questions asked.

And read. And read. See how the world is for those who are AS, and discover if assuming your child sees the world the same way, and having that alter how you deal with him, will improve his moods.

And, finally, continue pursuing a professional diagnosis. When you get the right one, you know it. If you have never reached that point of comfort with what they are telling you, then you haven't found the right diagnosis and your child is not getting the most effective therapies for whatever condition he has.

Does he know he has AS? Has he done research on it?

No Harlow he hasn't been told as yet.....We are still in the info gathering stage here....
He does know that one of his Drs suggested it might be the problem, but for the past Yr we have been focusing on getting him cleaned out (from all the wrong meds) and clear headed (as much as thats possible) from the yrs of innefectual therapy so that we can try to start over with a "clean" set of tests and a new Diagnosis.