Help! Need ideas for my son who is overwhelmed in Pre-K

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Hi Everyone,
I first want to say what an amazing website this is. So many people have really great ideas and information. My son is 4 1/2 - He is the sweetest, loving little boy. He has a sense of humor and can get a little too hyper sometimes. He makes loud noises and runs around or just laughs and tunes us out. Normally he is able to calm down on his own, or if I give him a break (usually water, food!) - At school he's never had this hyper/silly issue. Now he is showing signs of not listening. He refuses to follow his picture schedule routine (hang up backpack, unzip jacket, put his name tag up on the board) -- all things he did this summer and last year -- though, zipping his jacket he does need help with -- He just laughs and doesn't respond, or pretends to walk up to "circle time" and then laughs and runs away. Now do you think, in your opinion, he's avoiding something for a reason? He has sensitivity to noise and does tell me when things are too noisy... It's just not like him...the teacher, who is very nice removed him from the classroom to give him 1:1 instruction - my son was very mad/sad that he was removed and said he "didn't get to sing Goodbye song in circle." He was so upset all afternoon that he threw things and had a monologue with himself about "sitting down" and said other things that I think the teacher was saying to him. I really want to help him, because I know how much he wants to be part of the group in circle time, I don't want him to miss out just because he's overwhelmed.

Teachers say it's because he has a new little sister at home (the baby) and he just wants attention. But I really feel it's something else. Is it possible that he's not really understanding "what to do" even though he's done it before and there's a picture schedule, almost like he can't hear the teachers? Or he's not "seeing" where to put his jacket? Even though he has good eyesight? Does that make sense? Thanks so much for any ideas, sorry for the long post!

Hello.

Welcome to Wrong Planet, I hope you enjoy your stay here.

Before I can give any specific advice I have a few questions. When you say that he refuses to hang up his coat, what does this mean? Does he scream no when his teacher asks him to take off his coat and adamantly refuses to do what is asked of him? Or is it something simpler like his teacher tells him to remove his coat and then he zones out, and doesnt do what is asked of him?

As far as avoiding something by running away from circle time, I dont think that is the case. He wouldnt be laughing if he was running from something. Furthermore, the fact that he is bummed out that he didnt get to sing the goodbye song indicates that he did want to participate. Most likely he is just being mischievous. The teacher told him to do something, and he refused the request, which seemed funny to him. Its fairly typical mischievous behavior typical of young boys. I dont think there is really anything special going on there. If it just occurred once or twice I wouldnt worry too much about it. These sort of things happen. What young child doesn't try pushing the boundaries occasionally. He is just going to have to find out that if he doesnt do what is asked of him, then he wont be participating.

If you really feel that there is something more going on with your child, then it may not be too early to have him evaluated for an ASD because the earlier you can diagnose your child and get him appropriate supports and interventions in school, the better off he'll be in the long run. The tuning out, not following rules, clumsiness with zippers, noise sensitivity, and meltdowns are very similar to my Aspie son, who wasn't diagnosed until he was 10, and I wish we had him evaluated sooner. For example, your son may benefit from additional school supports such as occupational therapy and speech therapy. As far as your question about him avoiding something in school for some reason, this is possible but it can be very hard to figure out. The best feedback you can get is from the teacher, so I suggest you keep the lines of communication open and ask the teacher lots of questions about your son's behavior. Best of luck!

Welcome to WP!

Hi everyone,
Thanks for the "welcome". Just to clarify a little as my post was kind of vague....My son has been diagnosed with Autism and has been in school for more than a year. He has services through the school such as OT, PT, and Speech. He has done very well but now showing signs of not doing any physical task like, taking off backpack, unzipping jacket... When he gets on the bus, something I've seen him do successfully in the past, he just stops and won't step up the bus stairs. when I help him Iliterally am placing his feet on the stairs. Also at school he's not wanting to participate inside circle time, he just acts really "silly" and hyper. When the teacher prompts him to take off backpack and hang it up he just stands there...so as someone here pointed out, no he's not refusing, he's just not responding. When the teacher removes him from the group he would not do other tasks like color, etecetera. The teacher said she "avoided eye contact" and gave him simple commands like, "Put these in" -referring to blocks in a bucket... and he just sat there for ten minutes. I feel like the teacher could have done a better job. When a block dropped, he said, "Oops." and then he picked it up. But wouldn't put blocks in... this kind of scenario has been happening for more than two weeks. The teachers are saying they don't think it's a language processing issue but more of a behavioral one. Personally, I feel like he is overwhelmed lately... But I don't know why he has stopped doing things that I've seen him do successfully before. Any ideas? Thanks sooo much!
Katherine

It sounds like he might be developing something called 'Autistic Catatonia'. It is hard to tell with just this information. Does this sound familiar?

From:
http://www.nas.org.uk/nas/jsp/polopoly.jsp?d=128&a=3346

Catatonia is a complex disorder covering a range of abnormalities of posture, movement, speech and behaviour associated with over- as well as under-activity (Rogers, 1992; Bush et al, 1996; Lishman, 1998).

There is increasing research and clinical evidence that some individuals with autism spectrum disorders, including Asperger syndrome, develop a complication characterised by catatonic and Parkinsonian features (Shah and Wing, 2006; Wing and Shah, 2000; Realmuto and August, 1991).

In individuals with autism spectrum disorders, catatonia is shown by the onset of any of the following features:

* increased slowness affecting movements and/or verbal responses;
* difficulty in initiating completing and inhibiting actions;
* increased reliance on physical or verbal prompting by others;
* increased passivity and apparent lack of motivation.

Other manifestations and associated behaviours include Parkinsonian features including freezing, excitement and agitation, and a marked increase in repetitive and ritualistic behaviour.

Perhaps this from:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catatonia

According to the DSM-IV, the "With catatonic features" specifier can be applied if the clinical picture is dominated by at least two of the following:

* motor immobility as evidenced by catalepsy (including waxy flexibility) or stupor
* excessive motor activity (purposeless, not influenced by external stimuli)
* extreme negativism (motiveless resistance to all instructions or maintenance of a rigid posture against attempts to be moved) or mutism
* peculiarities of voluntary movement as evidenced by posturing, stereotyped movements, prominent mannerisms, or prominent grimacing
* echolalia or echopraxia

[edit] Subtypes

Stupor is a motionless, apathetic state in which one is oblivious or does not react to external stimuli. Motor activity is nearly non-existent. Individuals in this state make little or no eye contact with others and may be mute and rigid. One might remain in one position for a long period of time, and then go directly to another position immediately after the first position.

Catatonic excitement is a state of constant purposeless agitation and excitation. Individuals in this state are extremely hyperactive, although the activity seems to lack purpose.

....

A version known as "catatonia-like deterioration" occurs in 12-17% of autistic young adults.[7]:463 This form is made worse by antipsychotics. Unlike catatonic stupors, this deterioration happens very gradually. The only way to cure it is to keep the patient constantly active and the activities must have an end goal or they will not work. Stress must be reduced by not pressurising, keeping life predictable and by limiting choice as making choices is very stressful for catatonics.[citation needed]

Or perhaps this thread from WP:
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt83348.html



The current prevailing theory is that in autistic people this is caused by extreme ADD that is made worse by some factor such as excessive stress, depression, or anxiety. I could find some more links but I thought I would post these first and ask if they sound right.

Also, perhaps most importantly. If you think that your son has Autistic Catatonia, DO NOT!! !! ! give him anti-psychotics like abilify of risperdone. These will cause the condition to become much much worse.

I am not going to discourage you from looking into other causes and reasons, but I will remind you that the sense of taking one step backwards after two steps forward is really common in spectrum kids. They go through periods of frozen developement, and they go through periods of regression development, and the majority of parents here have experienced that at some point or another. There may be a reason that can be located; there may not be. It seems to be one of the mysteries of the condition.

Thanks so much everyone for your informative replies. I'm very interested, Tracker, in your post about Autistic Catatonia. Even though my son is very little, he could be showing some signs of this. I know he has some anxiety...he also freezes before getting on the bus, he just goes "limp" and we have to put his legs up on the stairs for him to get there. I don't want him to be stressed out, what are some ways to motivate him to get up the stairs on his own? The bus driver just says, "Come on, people are waiting!" and I think that makes him more stressed out.
Katherine

The first thing I would do is to follow your instinct that he is overwhelmend. I've learned over the years to use that as the default position, NOT behavioral issues. When I mitigate the stress, the behavioral issues tend to fix themselves. Not wanting to get on the bus is a clue that he has a lot of anxiety either with the bus and/or with school. Would it be possible for you to drive him to school for a while instead, so you can get a better feel for the situation and, possibly, eliminate one stress item from his day? Buses are noisy and kids tend to misbehave on them; not the best place for an AS child to start with.

I agree with DW that your son is probably overwhelmed by something. Thus leading to the current situation. I dont know whether or not he qualifies for 'autistic catatonia' but in reality it doesnt really matter because the course of action is the same either way: figure out what is causing your son to get overwhelmed, and try to help correct the problem.

Since it is late september, I am assuming your son just entered a new grade (probably his second year of preschool based on his age). As you said, this problem started a few weeks ago which would be just after the start of the school year. So my guess is that it may be something different about this year which is causing him more stress. Are you doing anything different this year then from last year? Perhaps your going full day instead of half day, or 5 days a week instead of 2? Does he have more kids in his class? Is it a different teacher? Different routine?

Often times parents tend to underestimate the difficulty that children with asperger's syndrome or autism have when dealing with the world. Many parents assume the problem is caused by willful bad behavior without realizing the stress that the autistic child is under. If a normal child was under the same deal of stress they would probably have the same behavioral problems as autistic children. Simple things like being in a room with a dozen children can be an overwhelming experience that can cause anxiety.

I wish I could tell you exactly what was causing the problem, but I really dont know enough about your situation to say. It could be that the class room is too chaotic, or that there are new kids in the class that are causing him to be nervous. It might be the change of routine caused by your new daughter which is making him nervous, I really dont know for certain. Have you tried asking your son what is upsetting him? Do you what changed just before your son started acting different?

Once you find out what is causing him to stress, try to mitigate it. If your problems are at school, you might want to consider reducing the amount of schooling he attends. I know that I didnt attend preschool, I just went strait to kindergarten. And many people who are older then me just started school at first grade. So it isnt as though your son needs to attend preschool in order to get ready. He may do better if you just keep him at home and spend some time reading to him instead of sending him off to a school which causes anxiety.

Yes that's right, if somethings wrong at school then maybe you need to spend more time with your child and lessen his time in school. That way he can rebuild his confidence again and maybe get back to normal after trying it.

Hi everyone,
I'm taking a little bit of everyone's advice. Thank you... I am keeping my son home from school because he has a cold and will spend a lot of time just playing and taking care of him and just letting him rest. Thanks again!
Katherine

Please let us know how it goes.