Anyone had child ripping/self-harming private parts?
My son is 4 and has a habit of pulling very violently on his penis and scrotum whenever they are uncovered. He gets so rough sometimes that my husband claims he gets light headed from empathy lol. We have to keep this area covered. Loose clothes are a must as we live at the bottom of the US. He has grown out of the 'hunting for an opening' phase. Now he just waits till he catches it out in the open lol.
It is frustrating. At one point he had pulled and stretched it so much that he had blood on his urine for 2 days. His pain tolerance is out of this world. So maybe, like other have suggested, that is part of the problem.
The only advice I can offer is that hopefully they will outgrow this, or you will find out what is causing it and go from there.
Good luck!
Listening to the advice all round regarding seeing a doctor about this issue, my husband phoned this morning to ask for an appointment. It turned out they had an opening for this morning, so that was encouraging. However, the visit was less than encouraging. As soon as I saw the doctor we got, I realised that this was the same lady we saw a few months back for my son's eczema, when I was desperate for a referral to the dermatology department! (The doctor seemed to think I was being silly to ask for my son to see a dermatology nurse, despite him having severely infected hands at the time and we were completely unable to keep it under control without very strong steroid/antibiotic cream! She told me there wasn't really anything they could do at dermatology, which the local doctors couldn't do! Grrrr!
In the end, I insisted I wanted him seen by someone who specalises in skin conditions - duh! And thanks to that visit, and the experience of the nurse, we were prescribed a milder steroid, together with a new cream, which seemed to end the era of "severe eczema".)
Soooo..... anyway, I didn't feel very hopeful when I saw her face! And I think she thought I was making too much out of it. Seemed to be asking, so what do you think could be wrong? There is nothing visible on the skin, no sign of any rash, nothing visible to swab, etc. Anything I suggested, she seemed to think unlikely. She didn't think any problem with his urinary system would make him attack his scrotum. She just mentioned about the scratch-itch-cycle, felt that was a more likely reason (habit) suggested he was probably at the age that he could be taught/trained to not scratch, etc. She prescribed a anti-fungal/antibacterial/steroid cream to put on him for 7 days just to see if it reduces the itching, though she said she doubted there was any need for it.
Not really any further than we were - guess you can't expect much from a young doctor who is probably not *very* long out of medical school. But I've often found that even older doctors can be quite clueless. Seems they get out in the community mainly dealing with colds/flus, etc and all they know is to prescribe antibiotics or steroids for everything. Need some doctors who really know their stuff! I think that's why I often despair of bothering to ask questions, because I can predict their answers.
And my son finds it quite stressful to see doctors/nurses about things and it rather makes him panic, so why put him through the trauma for nothing?
Anyway, we'll see if the cream does anything. Don't really like the idea of applying steriods to the private regions but best try and make sure there isn't anything hidden fungal there. The doctor also thought maybe he could have concentrated urine, which makes his skin itchy from being in nappies, and that perhaps it would improve when he was potty trained.
HeeeyMama: Glad to see your post and find someone with a similar age child who has a experience at least somewhat like ours. Obviously, not glad for your sake, but beginning to think I was the only one with a child who could do something like this! Just wondering, have you managed to attempt potty training at all? It would be so good to see if it helped my son be less itchy, but how to go about it is the difficult part!
He wears mitten sleepsuits at night (with secure rear zips), which certainly help him to sleep better as they give security, and prevent the ripping while he's in bed. I guess he's been wearing "special" pyjamas for a couple of years now, as it was often from his privates that the blood would come from when we'd get him out of bed in the mornings. Last night he kept waking in the night and "thumping" his privates through his pyjamas and nappy - one way he deals with the "itch" without doing damage.
My son is potty trained, for the most part. We still have to put training pants on him when he sleeps. He has frequent accidents through out the day. Most of the time it feels like 1 step forward and 5 steps back . But thats our life lol. When we started potty training it seemed to get worse. The penis was exposed more and he had an excuse for pulling on it then. But, luckily for us, and hopefully you too, the thrill seemed to lessen the more he was able to do it. Now we just consider ourselves lucky if he doesnt show his [/i] meanie[i] to everyone he meets
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I can't remember if you mentioned if his nappies are cloth or or disposable? It is possible to have a very itchy sensitivity to the chemicals in pampers, toilet paper, pads, tampons etc.
And if the nappies are cloth, then detergents, alcohol wipes, lotions etc. could be explored as possible culprits. Just another thought to throw on the list of things to try.
Hmm.. Yes. Tide Laundry Soap is EVIL.
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I would definitely start with potty training as soon as possible. It could very well be that he is developing an allergy to the diapers. Maybe you could start with taking him to the potty on a schedule. Since you said he drinks a lot, then maybe you could take him to the toilet about 15 minutes after his last drink and sit him up there and then if he goes, then give him a lot of praise, or a small reward. Keep doing this and talking about how if he feels peepee coming then to go to the potty.
There are lots of tips out there for potty training, and I don't know exactly what will work for your son, but thought that might be a way to start.
Good luck! I hope the cream helps!!
I know my experience is different- I have a daughter and she didn't make herself bleed- but it sounds like your son is going through what she did. She was sore and itchy all the time. She was totally miserable. Her doctor figured out eventually that she had a yeast infection. This was external, didn't show any physical signs, and was recurring.
There is actually a really easy way to find out if this is what is causing your son so much trouble. Get an over-the-counter yeast medication for women. I'm not sure if you have the same products we have in the U.S., but here Monistat is popular. Every time you change his nappy put the cream on his bits. You use it like you would a nappy rash ointment- all external!
It won't hurt him to try it as it washes off easily if he has a reaction. Also, if it seems to help but doesn't fix it, you can get a prescription for a stronger version of the same thing.
Once I found out that my daughter had these yeast infections, I changed laundry detergent to a fragrance free, dye free brand, stopped allowing bubble baths, and used a sensitive skin soap. These help my daughter reduce the number of yeast infections she has, but I still have to keep the cream on hand.
I hope this or something else works to help your son soon!!
No worries about scented stuff or laundry detergents here - we went detergent-free over a year ago for the clothes/laundry for EVERYONE in the family, in an effort to help his eczema. We mainly use pure soap for household cleaning too (just bleach for the toilets) but we went majorly natural over a year go - with natural shampoos for the family,etc So all his clothes are washed in a powder mix I make with soap flakes - unscented and very basic.
He had been in cloth nappies from birth, but we moved over to disposables about a year ago. He was getting too big for the cloth ones we had AND we found that he slept a lot better not being in cloth at nights. I think the bulk required to keep him dry was just too bulky in front of his bits and didn't allow enough room for natural expansion of his privates at night! So he'd wake up sometimes for an hour or so every night around midnight, needing to empty his bladder, but too enlarged/tense to pass urine - took ages for him to relax and finally wet his nappy and go back to sleep. But once we went over to disposables, this problem stopped and he didn't have to wake up so much/long for his midnight passing of urine! Originally we found he was more scratchy/itchy in disposables compared to cloth - but found a particular brand which seemed to suit him fairly well and didn't cause extra problems.
Having said that, we had a go of underpants yesterday! I bought about 20 pairs from Amazon (in USA) - some lovely soft, brushed cotton ones (as all the training pants we have over here are rough terry textured ones). Anyway, he was just wearing t-shirt and shorts over the training pants and I don't think he ever tried ripping all day - despite the easy access! However, we went through lots of wet changes of clothes when I forgot to TAKE him to the toilet. He went several times in the toilet, but mainly if I asked/told him he needed to go. But the lack of wearing nappies didn't really help him with having a bowel movement and so he was rather more tense at times (and behaviour is usually worse if he goes a day without a BM), so finally after so many changes of wet clothes yesterday, I got exhausted and put a nappy on him while I cooked dinner. And sure enough - he started getting itchy and ripped himself! Soooo, maybe he REALLY does need to be potty trained to stop this itching problem! He wanted to go back to underpants, and the scratching stopped! So in a way that was encouraging.
However, the ripping, and resulting open/raw skin made him sore. So when I came to put the prescribed medicine on him at bedtime, he screamed in pain and told me I had to wash it off! It's called Timodine, which has Nystatin, Hydrocortisone, Dimeticone, and Benzalkonium Cloride. It's the sort of cream that is often prescribed for thrush/yeast nappy rashes. Sooo, not sure what to think! He's very particular about what he'll allow on his skin - especially when it's open/sore.
But I'm thinking the best way forward is to keep trying the potty training! Just gets hard to find the energy when I'm 39 weeks pregnant with baby #4!
wow, Grace, didn't realize you were expecting and any day now too! Man, you have your hands full! Well, I am so glad that he likes being in the cloth underpants. I know right now it may be difficult to continue with the training. It sounds like he is ready. Anyway, maybe the cream did burn or something since the wounds were open. Are you going to have any help when the new baby comes? Maybe you can keep trying with the potty training.
Best of luck to you and your family!
Best of luck to you and your family!
Thanks angelbear! Afraid I don't have anyone to help when the new baby comes (well, apart from my husband). My sister has let me down this time (boyfriends!), so not even totally sure who will look after the other 3 when I'm in labour! But hopefully something will work out!



I think he should be seen by a dermatologist, and perhaps also be allergy tested.
He may have contact dermatitis due to an allergy to something coming in contact with his skin.
If they don't find anything, it wouldn't hurt to see if he has pinworms or anything like that. If he's asking to wear something to make him stop scratching, there is probably an actual reason he is itchy.
My son used to try to punch down that part waking without his permission... (sorry son! helping others). I spent a few years worried he would damage that frisky part permanently.
He didn't potty train until just before his 12th birthday almost overnight. What allowed a sudden switch? Will I ever know? I suspect it was related to his crush since we moved here. The ease on our budget from not needing adult size diapers was great. His independence and esteem raised.
Migraines will make him punch his own head as well as stim seriously. For stress he will punch his head or leg. I have mitigated these behaviors slowly, better since in a cooperative school.
He will mutilate his face. Originally the habit started when he was exposed to something at one of his previous schools that caused a rash.
Then it was over anything that was irregular about his skin. He started growing stiffer facial hair a year after that. he HATES it. Texture? Itch? It didn't seem to bother him once truly asleep but he had to be mittened. he would literally peel even flesh.
I knew stubble would make it worse and plucked a while. He now uses strips on his own whenever it grows to the point it bugs him. He tried once with the short hairs... that was even over his pain thresholds. Poor guy...sorry. I want to beg for a DX of electrolysis. It is not about beauty.
I used to bite myself when I was stressed out between ages 6-10. My bits and pieces were non-entity for me until I was at an age I had a solid understanding of how basic things work. My other son on spectrum also had a slight hostile relationship with his pet snake when he was younger but had better cognizance over it earlier.
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