Long Beautiful Hair

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Hi there! New user. Nice to be here!

My son turned 13 a couple of months ago and was diagnosed with AS at age 6. He tends to handle it pretty well to a point that when his Aspergers manifests itself it still takes us by surprise. I think this might be one of those times.

A few months ago my family got a new computer and I noticed a lot of YouTube ads showing up in the browser history for hair products - shampoos, conditioner, color - that sort of thing. They would show up weekly and I figured that some sort of advertising cookie got downloaded somehow associating the ads to the websites my wife visited.

Found out recently it was my boy. Apparently he likes to watch these hair product commercials as well as other videos of women with long hair - either brushing it or simply moving it around. It's pretty innocent stuff... there's little being shown in the way of skin or bodies - though I suspect there's probably a sexual component going on at some level, whether he realizes it or not. However at this point I can't really tell if it's an Aspie thing or a teenage thing or some combination of both.

Having been a 13 year old (non AS) boy myself it's not something I can completely relate to, (I'm really having trouble wrapping my head around it) and I'm wondering if this is a common obsession for adolescent AS kids. I know that there are often particularities about texture and fabrics and what-not but I don't know how it all relates to hair.

I personally don't feel its a cause for too much concern at this point, so long as it doesn't turn to an invasion of others' personal space. If you've had similar experiences I'd love to hear it.

I can relate to it.
There was no youtube when I was a 13 but as a teenage boy hair is fascinating and defiantly something I would find the object of fantasy.
I think he would appreciate some privacy

I watch a whole bunch of videos on YouTube that I would never want to tell my parents about. They're not dirty or sexual. I don't want them to know that I've been watching Kinks videos 24/7/365. Maybe something happened down the line, that he doesn't want to share his special interests, anymore. That's the way that I've grown up and turned out to be. I've gotten in so much trouble for talking about my special interests, that past the age of 14, I just didn't want to mention anything to my parents about the things that I loved, ever again. I've been doing a pretty good job of that. There were only 2 times that I've mentioned anything about my first love, in the past 14 months. One time last October, the day before Thanksgiving which wasn't a mistake, and this past June the 27th which was a mistake.

but did you see the texture of the hair in those videos? they're amazing
i had a hard time resisting hair as a child and teen, somehow my hand was drawn to it, although i know i shouldn't touch...
same thing with fur. Lady in the fur coat in front of me in the line at the mall: I'm touching your coat.
it's probably nothing sexual, just a fascination...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Um9KsrH377A[/youtube]

show him this one

I tottaly know how you feel. I used to be more than willing to share information about meerkats but I was always told stupid stuff like I needed to widen my horizons and stuff. When meerkat manor came out it was suddenly cool to like them and WAY before then my parents finnaly accepted that meerkats were part of me and even encouraged my special intrest in them. My mother forbids me to buy new stuffed animals becuase they take up space and are expensive, the only exception is stuffed meerkats and I've finnaly found some fossa plushies. But when a stranger asks me about meerkats, I'm like, "Go watch Meerkat Manor, you dumbass!" I have one special intrest that I keep to myself and share with my best friend...Titan A.E.. I think I only share it with her becuase I know she be mean to me about it. When other people ask me about it I'm like, "It's a movie about this guy who has to find a magic spaceship." I'm not comfortable talking about it except with my best friend. I also try to avoid talking about special intests that are obscure topics because I feel if more people know about it, I won't like it anymore. I felt as if meerkats were being stolen from me after this meerkat manor popularity craze. When I discovered how popular Invader Zim and Gir were, it was no longer a special intrest and I don't really like it anymore. How can other people like it? Fools! You do not know what it is like to feel like Zim and Dib! Foosas were a special intrest (not as big as meerkats but pretty close) for a while but after Madagasgar came out, other people liked them and just look type in "fossa" on Deviant Art. Perhaps my special intrest should be linsangs or African palm civets. It's probably a blessing in digusise that the movie critics hated Titan A.E. and it's so obscure. I try to avoid talking about my special intrests because I fear other people will discover them and I will feel like the intrest is being stolen from me but the main reason is becuase I got so much scorn for talking about them as a child.

My parents used to force me to have my hair cut becuase I supposedly couldn't take care of it as a kid. I would cut it myself because my scalp itched so bad (I was screened for head lice more than umteen times). My parents thought I was cutting my hair because I thought the hair was making my head itch. No, I was cutting it so it wouldn't get in the way when I stratched. I always hated having my hair cut because I was never allowed to expirment with my idenity. I wanted to dye my hair pink as a teenager but my parents said no because it would make people think I was weird. People already thought that about me even with my natural brown hair. People always were able to pick up on the fact that there was something "off" about me and pink hair would have distracted them. I always bring my pet lizard with me to distract people from that "offness". My parents insist I look better with short hair but I think it makes me look like a sterotypical mentaly challanged person. My parents argue that I look that way with long hair becuase I look like someone who can't take care of themself. Mentaly challanged people hardly ever have long hair becuase their caretakers make them get it cut. I always thought the people at the beauty salons cut it too short but it turns out that my mother would tell them behind my back to cut it that way. I made up my mind at a very young age that when I was an adult and was no longer the properity of my parents, I was going to have long hair and never get it cut. I have long hair as an adult and no matter how much my parents plead, I am never going to get it cut.

My son is still a little guy (4 1/2), but he loves hair. He is constantly touching hair. Mine, his own, people he just met, whoever. He even puts his feet in my hair which drives me crazy sometimes, but he absolutely loves it. Sometimes I watch him while he is playing with my hair and he twists it certain ways and runs it through his fingers in a way that seems to me like he is really studying my hair; like he is in awe over the texture and look of it. I have a feeling this is something that provides him comfort and stimulates his mind. Hair is neat! Especially long, shiny, flowing hair. I can't personally relate, but I guess I can kind of see where a fascination with hair might come from and I wouldn't think it is super strange.

My older brother, now 25 (he has some emotional/behavioral problems, but is not on the spectrum), used to have this "thing" where he would suck his fingers and twist his hair at the same time (my son does the same now, but it's with his thumb). With my brother, this started when he was a baby. If you sat anywhere near him, he would start to twist your hair instead of his own. This lasted steadily until he got into high school at which time the finger sucking finally stopped. However as I mentioned above, he is now 25 and the hair thing is still happening. His girlfriend tells me that he is always playing with her hair, especially if they are just watching tv or going to sleep. He also likes for her to use certain shampoos and conditioners because of the scents and the way they make her hair feel and doesn't like others for the same reason. He's not a big computer person, so I don't think he has ever looked up videos about hair, but there is obviously a deep interest in hair.

I would say that it is not a big deal and to not worry too much about it. Hair might just be an interest for some people, but perhaps the Aspergers makes it more of an "obsession" for your son. Don't worry yourself too much on this one. It could be something worse!

One of the aspies I dated loved long hair and actually became very upset with me when I cut mine. We're still in touch and quite a few years ago I met another girlfriend of his. Her hair was actually past her knees.

And for what it's worth, I happen to like longer hair on a man too. My husband was sweet and left his hair on the longish side for our wedding. When he gets annoyed with me he will cut his hair to be spiteful - it will be so short that it's like a long buzz cut.

I don't know why I like longer hair. It's probably partly because of the sensory aspect. I like running my fingers through it. It's also not uncommon for me to remember the way someone's hair smells if I've gotten close enough to notice.

I don't particularly like long hair but I like nice hair and especially dyed hair, but not to the point of viewing hair ads.

I had a thing for hippies as a teenager, because of their long hair. Each day as I did my homework, I used to fatasize about hippies of both genders, and their long hair. The first thing that drew me to The Kinks was seeing Dave Davies with long hair that was parted in the middle, taken in 64 and 65, when I was 18. Wow! That was back in 1993.

You mean there are men who aren't fascinated by long beautiful hair? Especially if it's clean, smoothly brushed, soft, mmmmmm....

Would you be worried if your son were sneaking peeks at your Playboy magazines? I think it's pretty normal for 13 year old boys to be interested in attractive ladies.