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EarthCalling
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20 Apr 2007, 12:05 pm

What are your experiances with getting "accomidations" or the school "onside" with you. Do you feel like your child is "misunderstood?"


Well, it seems that the school is making a lot more accomidations. They have finally given up, it is easier to just do what I want, then it is to discuss " what to do with me" and "manage mom" and they "cannot ignore me" anymore.

I know I still will be smoothing out bumps for the rest of the year, but over all, it seems to be going in the right direction. Somehow, we salvaged the whole year and situation.

That said, what drives me nuts, is a lot of these "accomidations" that I am "insisting on" are things that are in his IEP, and things that they have DONE BEFORE!

For example, my son has to take french, (now with the label I might be able to spring him out of it, but the trouble is, to do what? At 12 / 13 years old, there is really nowhere they can send him, and it attracts negative attention from his peers. Besides, he kind of "likes it". Anyway, when he started, the teacher would "write the words for him" and had to take them as a "fill in the blank" or "Match them" to the right answer. With this, he did really well. Very well. So, what does that mean? Must be too easy for him!... We need to start making him write it regularly!

Same thing happened with testing. I asked for a "clear outline of questions he would be asked, along with an explanaiton of the "structure" or "way" the question is presented. Because he cannot adapt to a different "format" very easily. So, if they want him to make a chart, he needs prior experiance to do this, or if they want him to measure an angle, they better make sure it "looks" like ones he has had experiance with before. So, they instead suggest, "no, why don't we just give him the whole test the night before?... he can do it with you, and then we will give him the same test and see what he retained?" I say I don't think it is nessisary, but they insist. So, we do that, twice. He does ridiculously well! over 95% when usually he is a 40-70% student... So, is this a good thing? No, something must be "wrong"! And they retreat, and he is back to square one with no help! grrr. :x

I know they resist accomidations, because it takes extra planning on their part. But I also think that they are genuinely perplexed, "how can he do that well?" The only answer they could historically come up with, was that the accomidations where "too easy for him, he is bright enough to do the work, we just have to "make" him. they are just so stuck in thinking that the problems students like him have must be behaivoral, not derived from a genuine "learning difference". So, they try to shove him into their "box" again.

*sigh*. As time goes by, I am getting better at "demanding" the accomidations. Now with some labels, and the right IEP in hand, I can "force" them to keep to their commitments.

I just got off the phone with the Vice Principle. He suggested that my sons problems are not "that significant" and that he is a "likable" person, and a "great kid". this is all true, no one thing is a "huge problem". It is when they all compound together that you have problems. I also think that they don't understand that while his problems are not "significant", they are more or less "perminant". The "solutions" for other kids with similar "difficulties" in one area, just don't work with him.

Thanks for listening to my "rant". :lol:



Smelena
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21 Apr 2007, 5:52 am

What a pain having to constantly be on to them.

Maybe you could think of yourself as a pioneer, and future Asperger's kids at his school will get better support and understanding due to your hard work.

Maybe your son needs to have a good meltdown in front of the Vice Principal ... that would get him moving quickly!

My son has a substitute teacher for 12 weeks while his usual teacher has gone off on long service leave. He's had 2 days with her so far.

I think the substitute teacher is a little scared of me. I've been very assertive (not aggressive though). I am more confident of knowing what Daniel needs and ensuring he gets it.

So the substitute teacher followed most (but not all) of what had been put in place.

On the second day Daniel had a beauty of a meltdown. Now the substitute teacher 'gets it' and I don't think she'll be ignoring anything. Good on you son!!

Do you have any Autism/Aspergers Community group that could advocate for your son, or provide education to the teachers?

It must be so hard for you with your own communication difficulties. I find it difficult and communication is one of my strengths.

Feel free to rant any time.

Regards
Smelena

P.S. I had my own rant in the 'in-laws' thread



ster
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21 Apr 2007, 7:19 am

because my son "looks normal", the schools have always reacted as if he is simply a behavior problem~that there's nothing wrong with his way of functioning that a good ol' bit of discipline won't handle. wish i had advice for you. our school system finally relented & said that they couldn't educationally plan for our son, and so we got the one GIANT accomodation that they could give us~alternate placement



EarthCalling
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21 Apr 2007, 8:20 am

Well, if you read my "hell" post, (long) my son broke his arm last night. He just can't catch a break. :cry: It is going to be interesting to see how the school deals with this. He is right handed, and he broke his left hand. Still, with the motor skills problems he has, I think it is still going to be very hard on him to write anything for a long time.


*ugh*



ster
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22 Apr 2007, 9:47 am

can you get your regular ped to write a note for son for when he returns to school so that he can get some help ?.............you know, around here, you can get a temporary 504 plan for any child who might be experiencing difficulties due to injury or temporary disability. for instance, a 504 could outline a plan for any accomodations that he might need ( if he'd broken his leg, the 504 could outline a plan for letting him either leave class early to get to the next class, or having another student help him carry books....)



Chupa-Thingie
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22 Apr 2007, 11:01 am

EC, we have had homework and other accomodations in place for years, but EVERY year we have to fight to get the teachers to live up to them, especially the homework ones. Recently we had a teacher say that she had decided to start getting tough on deadlines. Nope, not without our agreement, you won't! Hilarity ensues. :roll:

I don't think that fight will end until he graduates.

BTW, I am sorry to hear about your son's injury. Good luck to you guys!

<thumbs up!>