Camp

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I did a sort of bad thing today. Here's the backstory: about six weeks ago I signed DS up for a science day camp. There was nowhere on the form to note any conditions, so I didn't/couldn't mention his HFA. He has only been diagnosed for a few months, anyway, and can sometimes pass as a very weird NT kid. He has been VERY excited and looking forward to the camp ever since I enrolled him.
When I droppd him off for his first day, unexpectedly there's a new form to fill out. On the spot. While he's standing there practically jumping up and down with happiness. And there's a line wanting to know if there's any conditions they should be aware of. Crappppp. I left it blank. I just couldn't bear the thought that they might look at it and turn him away - he would have been devastated.
How terrible am I? Has this situation ever happened to any of you, and how would you handle it? I would have gladly noted his HFA if it had been on the FIRST form, at not sprung on me literally right before he walked in the door.

edited to add: I forgot to tell him not to mention his ASD, and he loves to talk about it. He's probably already asked everyone at camp whether they have ASD, too.

As long as he doesn't act out severely, I don't see the problem. I wouldn't be surprised if there are other people with ASD's whose parents didn't mention it on the forms.

He seems like he's high-functioning--and is in a place he enjoys. He'll probably just talk about science, and maybe mention his ASD in passing.

Science Camp is probably the best place to "disclose"--most of the denizens there are probably close to being Aspergian, anyway LOL

If you are sending him to camp I have to assume you think he can handle that particular camp. I sent my son to a summer school this year and was in the same position. He's much younger so he's still at the age group where no one is going to think much if he does something odd or opts out of an activity. There was a space on the a last minute form for medical conditions. I put "ASD (no additional help needed)" down but I really had to wrangle with the decision. My assumption was that no one was going to think much of it after the met him. I really didn't want to put it down because I didn't want him singled out or treated differently, I also didn't think it would matter...meaning that I didn't think it would help them at all during their day or anything.

I think your form put it better in that they didn't ask a very open ended question or tell you to list all medical conditions, but rather asked of there were any conditions they should be aware of. Should is a funny word! Sounds like your boy is going to do great there so telling them whatever his diagnosis is sounds like it would be as helpful as telling them he likes science, or the color red, or football. In fact, if he is cool enough to tell them as part of what he likes to talk about that is awesome. The boy is taking ownership of who he is. I like it.

I would think you would be OK as long as things go smoothly and there are no disciplinary issues. I don't think it is fair that they sandbagged you with that. The only thing you could have conceivably done is called and asked about it, weeks ago. If I had a kid that "passes" I wouldn't have done that either.

The way that I look at it is it is likely irrelevant in that environment with your particular kiddo. It is not a life-threatening allergy. It is not contagious. And if they don't need to handle him differently than the other kids then the "need to to be aware of" isn't there.

I agree that it probably would not have been an issue with them, and they might have just asked you some additional questions, but I would not have wanted to rock that boat at the 11th hour either, with a happy little guy there waiting.

LOL, I just had this conundrum myself! DS has been in an afterschool improv camp, and agreed to do their summer camp. I'd never disclosed his diagnosis because a) it was clear to me that the group was Aspieville Central and I guessed they knew and b) I normally don't disclose unless asked specifically about it (DS can pass in normal circumstances, and we've gotten past the place where he discloses indiscriminately - although we do have an awful lot of ThinkGeek ASAN t-shirts .)

Of course, I got the form two weeks before camp, and it asked for "any medical condition, including ADHD, autism, SPD, etc." (I forget the exact list, but AS was on it!) Since they asked me directly, I disclosed...and I also had to explain that DS, after having OKed the camp, is now getting all grumpy about it. Sigh.

IMO, they're looking for anything they might have to deal with in an emergency - like allergies, etc. Would paramedics need to know he has AS in order to treat him? I don't think they typically want information about neurological status unless it's epilepsy or something like that, and if you are busted, that's what you should say - something like you assumed they were looking for emergency/pertinent information, and you don't consider AS in that category, it's a neurological difference that shouldn't affect your son's ability to attend camp.

That being said, I have made an egregious error in this way before: a group of us who have kids on the spectrum stupidly enrolled all our kids in a camp together; two of us didn't disclose, because we never had to before. We found out quickly that AS+AS does not cancel itself out, it compounds - the kids were unmanageable jerks for the whole camp. (No trips to the hospital or anything, but they did make it unpleasant for the teacher and possibly other kids.) That being said, the camp wasn't a very good one: it was clearly run by film students who had no experience teaching at all.

A class or camp that's good for kids on the spectrum is just a really good class or camp for all kids. You just have to find those.

Reacting in the moment is difficult, so I wouldn't say you did anything "bad."

I can't imagine any science camp turning away an ASD child; they must be used to them. Same with theatre camps; they always have an ASD child.

That said, I ALWAYS disclosed, simply because that also gave me the opportunity for giving them the protocols on how some things needed to be handled with my son. For example, if he walked away from the group, it would mean he was feeling stress, and the worst thing they could do was try to drag him back in. He knew not to leave their sight, and I told them so. I also warned them not to make abrupt transitions or just change their minds / break promises. There never were any problems, and they always appreciated the heads up - especially on the walking away thing, since leaving him alone was opposite of what they had normally been trained to do.

I do understand being put on the spot, however. Doing the medical forms the morning of is not all that uncommon; be aware that there will ALWAYS be medical forms, so if you didn't do it at sign up, you can guarantee to get one the morning of.

Both my kids are working camps today (literally). They've moved on and become the teachers / counselors / aides So many happy memories of all those summer day camps ... I am glad that both my kids (yes, including my ASD son!) like working with younger kids, and are pretty decent at it (my daughter better than my son but, heck, for an ASD teen to even know how to tolerate overly active and annoying kids seems like a grand achievement to me! This year he gets to be a teacher, so reading the individual needs won't be a big issue - that will be someone else's job)

I always struggle with this, but I always end up letting someone know. If there is a place on the form, then I will put it down, but if not, I will pull at least one of the leaders of the group aside and let them know. In general, I think they really do appreciate the heads up. In most situations, even if I don't say anything, someone usually picks up on the fact that my son is "different".

I don't think you did anything wrong though. As parents of children on the spectrum, we are often put on the spot or faced with uncomfortable situations, and we just do the best we can in the moment.

Well, all in all camp went pretty well. He only came home upset one day, and that was because he felt his partner wasn't letting him help on their project. I gave him a couple of lines to use - "What can I do to help?" etc. and after that everything was (as far as I can tell) fine.

Great news!