any parents on the spectrum homeschooling their kids?

Page 1 of 2 [ 17 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

willaful
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Mar 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 788

27 Mar 2012, 11:14 am

I really feel like I should homeschool my son next year. He'll be starting sixth grade/middle school and the administration is very resistant to accommodating his needs. He's already unhappy in school and I think he'll be miserable there.

I think he'd do great as a homeschooled kid. He's very smart and loves to learn. And we have many resources in our area and can afford to pay for classes, events, etc. My worries are about me:

-- I need downtime and quiet in my own home and I get pretty crazy if I don't get it. Since my husband telecommutes, this is already an issue. Having them both here all the time would send me round the bend.

-- I hate driving and have severe anxiety around it. I'll have a really hard time taking him places. Moreover, he doesn't usually like going places all that much. He's a homebody like me. So it'll be really easy to let that part slide.

Anyone with similar issues making it work?


_________________
Sharing the spectrum with my awesome daughter.


itsymama
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 22 Mar 2012
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 6

30 Mar 2012, 1:35 am

Well sort of, I am homeschooling two of mine, this is our first "official" year though (my oldest is 7 and my middle is 4 and those are my two learners, my third is only is 15 months), it's been a rough start honestly, I know homeschooling, know how it works and what it's really like, I was homeschooled myself, but for some reason it's been really a challenge for me to get with it, and until now I didn't really understand why. You see I was only diagnosed with Aspergers about two weeks ago, and before then never knew it was a possibility, so it's been very eye opening (among other things) for me, and I'm still learning what that means for me and so on. I also learned at this same time that I have difficulty with executive function, so I guess those are the reasons why I am having such a hard time keeping on task, keeping organized and consistent.

Also, like you I hate driving and have severe anxiety around it, so that is an issue we have to deal with as well.

Does he like to read? When you would feel like you need that quiet alone time could you have him do a reading hour in his room? Or some other quiet activity that he enjoys? Is that something he could do?

One great thing about homeschooling is that you can bend it to fit your life, so if you are knee deep in work but just need to, you can take a break and pick back up later, you don't have to do things just like they do in school, so you could find what works for the two of you at home and even if it's miles away from how "they" do it you can both still thrive in it. And it's important to remember two things, 1. the first year (or two) may be trail and error, that's ok, 2. If something just isn't working, stop and try something else till you find what does.

would suggest looking up your states homeschooling laws (if you haven't already) and get an idea of what your dealing with, also look into any homeschool groups you have in your area, a good one is worth it's weight in gold, and will be full of others who will be more then happy to lend support to each other and help new homeschoolers out when they need it.

Good luck with whatever you choose.


_________________
Rachel <3


blondeambition
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Oct 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 718
Location: Austin, Texas

30 Mar 2012, 8:03 am

willaful wrote:
I really feel like I should homeschool my son next year. He'll be starting sixth grade/middle school and the administration is very resistant to accommodating his needs. He's already unhappy in school and I think he'll be miserable there.

I think he'd do great as a homeschooled kid. He's very smart and loves to learn. And we have many resources in our area and can afford to pay for classes, events, etc. My worries are about me:

-- I need downtime and quiet in my own home and I get pretty crazy if I don't get it. Since my husband telecommutes, this is already an issue. Having them both here all the time would send me round the bend.

-- I hate driving and have severe anxiety around it. I'll have a really hard time taking him places. Moreover, he doesn't usually like going places all that much. He's a homebody like me. So it'll be really easy to let that part slide.

Anyone with similar issues making it work?


I have not homeschooled exactly (just tutored a whole lot); however, the lack of respite is very familiar. I would look into classes in your area for him to attend several days a week--if you pay in advance and it's regularly scheduled, you will be less likely to let things slide. I would also look into local respite services and care. In the past, I have found people from sittercity.com or care.com to help me out with childcare (I have 2 kids on the spectrum) or to help with housework. When I've hired people who just have babysitting or nanny experience, I have always been around while the nanny or babysitter plays games with my kids or assists with other childcare duties--sort of like a teacher's aid. I can use the computer, read, or do whatever while the nanny/sitter is doing the hands-on childcare.

Also, I would try to think of things that you and your son can do together outside of the house. It doesn't matter if it is far away or within walking distance. Just try to get out daily.

Finally, you can use your computer and TV to give you respite and educate your son at the same time--educational games, videos, DVDs, etc. Please check out all the free videos that I have on my website (www.freevideosforautistickids.com) and also check out the links on the sidebar to find other helpful websites, programs, support groups, products, etc.

http://www.freevideosforautistickids.co ... Links.html

Above is a portion of my free website with a whole lot of links that are helpful for homeschoolers.


_________________
www.freevideosforautistickids.com is my website with hundreds of links and thousands of educational videos for kids, parents and educators. Son with high-functioning classic autism, aged 7, and son with OCD/Aspergers, aged 4. I love my boys!


willaful
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Mar 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 788

31 Mar 2012, 11:52 am

Thanks for the suggestions. I'm somewhat familiar with homeschooling law here -- we homeschooled him for kindergarten -- and there are lots of simple, legal ways to do it. Our school even has a homeschool option, which is what we used before. It's on the same campus he's at now and offers a few classes per week, so would be very convenient. I might even be able to get adaptive PE and social skills for him, if I can fight hard enough. Though I'm a terrible fighter. :(

I think my hardest goal might be convincing my husband that this is a good idea and I can do it. It'll be especially hard to convince him since I'm not entirely convinced myself! My husband thinks we should start him off in school and save homeschooling as a last resort. I'd rather not have to wait for him to be bullied or clinically depressed.


_________________
Sharing the spectrum with my awesome daughter.


Karma1
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 3 Mar 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 10

02 Apr 2012, 7:00 pm

I respect you for taking this into serious consideration. I don't think it would be an easy task.

My DD is in a special school for HFA, and we fought the school district tooth and nail to get her placed there. It is a private school, but the school district pays for her tuition, since she has a right to an appropriate education, that non-public schools cannot provide her. It took several years to get everything in place. She is now 7 years old.

Homeschooling was not an option. I know I'd be very stressed, and wouldn't know how to meet her educational needs as well as trained professionals. Homework is a challenge as it is.

The other thing is that DD qualifies for 12 hours of respite care, thanks to her diagnosis through a government affiliated regional body. It isn't a lot, but it is a wonderful opportunity to get out of the house to do some shopping, or take out my (NT) DS for some alone time.

My brother is an Aspie. I recall my mother tried to homeschool him for a year or two, because he was so unhappy at school. But in the end it was too much for her. She also fought for a place for him at a special school, and won.

Good luck with your decision!



liloleme
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jun 2008
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,762
Location: France

03 Apr 2012, 3:23 am

I tried homeschooling for some time with a few of my kids who had some issues at school, especially my oldest. The only thing I can say is that make sure you have a good plan, a good curriculum. If you need your own space and you have your husband and kid in the house you just have to make your own place....there are always earphones, MP3's and your child can do some of his school work on the computer. They have many computer based curriculum that you can use. You do not have to be at your childs side at all times.
I think If you have a drawn out plan and are well prepared then it will be easier than just diving in.



aann
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 19 Nov 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 486

04 Apr 2012, 3:14 am

I home school my kids. I'm a homebody of sorts, but maybe you are more so. Your son is at the level where you don't teach him much. He is getting rather independent especially if he is smart and loves to learn, so don't worry so much about him being underfoot. You can work with him to have him give you plenty of space.

If your son is an aspie or not, I would think it would be important for him to take at least one homeschool class. Possibly your husband can drive him at times. Is it easier if it is very routine? Can you walk to a library? We make the library our second home so maybe that would help your need for space, but also not cause much driving anxiety. HTH.



ExcitinglyOpaque
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 7 Apr 2012
Age: 60
Gender: Female
Posts: 56
Location: Kentucky

08 Apr 2012, 7:12 pm

I plan to, for similar reasons.



MMJMOM
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 May 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 750

08 Apr 2012, 9:08 pm

I am not Aspie, but I do homeschool my son who has Aspergers. It is defenitly a challenge homeschooling a child with Aspergers, but we make it work. All in all, it may take 90 mins to get his schoolwork done for the DAY, and it would probably take less time if he actually paid attention...lol! That leaves us the whole day to get out, do things, activities, homeschool groups, programs...or just enjoy the day, play games go to the park, read, library, etc...My son is academically advanced, and continues to be so even after homeschooling him for K and now 1st grade, so I KNOW he is learning. In fact, at 6, he has already completed a full year of grade 2 math and is well into 3rd grade math. We read daily, write daily, do math and ELA daily, socail studis and science is a few times a week. he gets piano lessons, karate 2x a week, bowling, speech OT and socail skills group thru the school district, and then another 2 social skills groups out of school, and swimming. I am sure I left something out...lol. But yeah, we are busy. BUt he is learning, he has freinds thru the homeschool groups, he is happy and thriving and no one is bullying him and he gets to learn at his fast pace that he is capable of, etc...

it is defenitley something you have to WANT for your child.

As for the fathers...my DH wasnt convinced either. He wanted my son in school, but I told him we can take it one year at a time. I did my research, read tons of homeschooling books, joined local homeschool groups, etc.. and was well versed in homeschooling myths and facts before I even spoke the H word to my DH...lol

good luck!


_________________
Dara, mom to my beautiful kids:
J- 8, diagnosed Aspergers and ADHD possible learning disability due to porcessing speed, born with a cleft lip and palate.
M- 5
M-, who would be 6 1/2, my forever angel baby
E- 1 year old!! !


willaful
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Mar 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 788

09 Apr 2012, 11:56 am

I'm trying to find out as much as I can and plan before September. My husband is very anti, so I need a plan firmly in place if I'm going to convince him.


_________________
Sharing the spectrum with my awesome daughter.


Kailuamom
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 Jul 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 660

09 Apr 2012, 1:00 pm

My situation is different than yours, as I work full time outside of the home. However, a couple things have been really helpful in our homeschooling journey:

1 - We work with a homeschool charter which provides a teacher to meet with once per week. She provides assignments, and we turn in work to her. This has been important so not everything is a negotiation. DS can negotiate doing all sorts of fun other stuff, once the assignments are complete. The teacher is really flexible, so if we have an idea of a great engaging assignment, she will "assign" it - this just provides accountability.

2 - Because I'm not home, I hire people to work with my son. They aren't really tutors, more like "focusers". they provide the 1:1 attention my Ds needs to get stuff done. Hopefully this will fade over time, but it has been really helpful for me. Even if I was home full time, I might like this. This person also engages DS in physical activity which I really don't want to do. They jump on the trampoline, walk the dog and go on field trips.

When we decided that homeschooling would be best for my son, we had to open our minds and figure out strategies to get it done, no matter what our issues are.

Good luck!



NigNag
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 22 Apr 2012
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 60

23 Apr 2012, 10:39 am

I home schooled my son from grade 1 to grade 6. I pulled him out of the local schools because they were making his situation worse, rather than better.
It was great for him to be able to develop and grow at his own pace. He decided he wanted to try regular school again, and he is at a small charter school that focuses on college prep courses.
The school was selected due to very small class sizes (17 kids per class or less). The transition back to regular school has gone OK, although he seems to be having some issues with greater academic demands in the second semester (harder material, higher expectations) as well as social issues (kids think he is weird). He is behind academically in math and writing, but he has been since he was in preschool. He makes progress, it just takes him a very long time to get things. I think the biggest problem I found with homeschooling is the isolation issue. It is very hard sometimes to find appropriate places to meet other kids. I think if you can find the right educational fit in the public schools (smaller classes or charter school) being in a public school can provide experiences socially that they just can't get being home schooled. On the flipside, if your child is constantly being bullied, not supported, etc. I think it is better for them to be home schooled. There are many online schooling options that incorporate social exposure and curriculum.



seddleman
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 14 May 2012
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 1

15 May 2012, 11:11 pm

Dealing with school became such a nightmare, that I pulled my younger 2 sons out of school. I homeschooled my middle son from the 5th grade to graduation and next year will be the last year for my youngest son. We actually used the unschooling method and for my sons, it worked out great! My middle son was 2 years behind but was still passed on to the next grades when he started homeschooling and my youngest was in the 1st grade when he started to homeschool. I tried the schedules and the grading and such, but the boys just were not learning. When I let go of what I thought I was "supposed " to be doing as far as schooling, then it became much easier for me and my sons. My middle son actually graduated at age 16 even though he was behind at first. He took a couple of years to develop his art, and think about what he would like to do in his life. He is now in vocational rehab to find a job .



momsparky
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Jul 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,772

16 May 2012, 10:13 am

Another point to think about: respite care is often available via your state or local government. Check with your local Autism society.



FJP
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jul 2010
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 228
Location: Northern Michigan

18 May 2012, 1:31 pm

My wife and I have homeschooled our son from the start. It's alot of work, but it's great. I do think it's important to find at least a few groups to be a part of. Our local homeschool group has Park day, Lego Club, We pool our money and a local church has a gym ( yes, a full size gym!) that they rent to our group crazy cheap.
Even little things like going to library and grocery shopping can be a fun social event for your child. My Aspie son is like a celebrity at the local library.



MagicMeerkat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jun 2011
Age: 37
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,975
Location: Mel's Hole

18 May 2012, 3:21 pm

My very ASish mom homeschooled me since the fith grade. My parents were never "you must make friends and be social" Nazis and never tried to force me to socialize. My mom tried a program at the local YMCA for it, but none of them seemed to work and the other kids were quite mean to me. The adults running the program were absolutely clueless about how to work with a child with autism. That was back in the mid or late 90's where no one really knew anything about Asperger's. I never had much desire to socialize with other people anyway.


_________________
Spell meerkat with a C, and I will bite you.