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Mother of an Aspie needs some advice...

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jackbus01
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18 May 2012, 3:24 pm

dancingwaters wrote:
CuriousKitten wrote:

I would further expand that out to not just include knives. Anything that is intended to make someone else scared, is asking for jail time trouble. The only possible exception would be to defend his life or the life of another, but still there would be a police inquiry as a result.


I like that I will have to use that because it could be more than just that some time later and him being so litteral would not see the connection between to different items.


It could even be worse. Sometimes when people are suddenly threatened they will fight back. He could get physically hurt! The knife situation is alarming and should be treated as such.



Chronos
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18 May 2012, 4:09 pm

dancingwaters wrote:
My 13 year old son is an Aspie. He has been diagnosed for 7 years now. We have him in therapy, a after school program for social skills, He has a case manager that works with him on life skills and he has made great strides over the last few years.

Ok on to my problem.

I came home today and my younger son 12 had a friend over and they had been in the kitchen. The friend had made the statement that he is not afraid of anything. So my Aspie son went to the knife drawer and pulled out a knife and held it up to the boy and asked are you scared now. Now he was not angry and did this solely to test the boys statement. This scares me. It seams to be there is a disconnect of a rational thought process when it comes to his actions. I am totally at a loss on how to move forward with this from a teaching standpoint. I never thought he would do anything like this.

Any help or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.


Believe it or not, "normal" teenagers do things like this. Especially teenaged boys. The difference is, a "normal" teenaged boy might do something like this as a threat, and your son was doing this to determine whether the other boy actually wasn't afraid of anything. I would simply tell your son that it's not acceptable to pull weapons on people unless he needs to defend himself or someone else from a dangerous physical threat.



hoegaandit
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18 May 2012, 8:07 pm

My 17yo diagnosed ASD son still has not gotten the idea that he must not take lunch stuff that I need to spread out over the week; it leads to the ludicrous situation that I go and hide the lunch stuff in different places and he seeks it out and usually finds it and eats it. I have told him not to do this hundred of times but the lure of something nice to eat immediately seems too strong.

As regards the knife we had once a concerning situation where he pulled a knife on his older sister. Obviously something like that is a completely different order of things from stealing lunch food. I think as DW_a_mom said you just do have to "overreact" in that sort of situation, as it is absolutely critical that the message be gotten through.

This is a real concern with our son, given his history of inappropriate behavior at times. What if he is living on his own and some guy behaves real nastily to him. Is he going to pull a knife and stab him? It seems quite unbelievable to me that a child of mine could do such a thing, but in my son's case, given all his history, while a very small risk I think that very small risk is there.



OliveOilMom
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18 May 2012, 9:14 pm

Tell him thats dangerous, he could hurt somebody accidentally or more likely get hurt himself by somebody misunderstanding him. Tell him to try and think about how other people might take his actions before he does something impulsive/new, etc.


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