Child steals and hides food compulsively. Aspie trait?

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My daughter, now fifteen, has dealt with similar issues from the time she was a toddler. She was diagnosed with ADHD age the age of five but was squirrelling away sweets from the time she was two or three. We have spoken to several specialists about this issue and it was suggested to us that she perhaps has a sugar addiction (for which they've offered no solutions).

With the exception of fruit, we don't provide sweet snacks in the house for our family. We are vegetarians, we don't drink juice, and eat almost completely organically. However, this doesn't seem to make a difference. The baking cupboard is a dream come true for her. She will eat icing sugar, raw sugar, raw honey, she will even drink maple syrup right out of the glass bottle, and if we don't watch her closely while we're out we'll start finding individual empty ketchup packets from mall food courts in her room and around the house.

We started locking up the baking cupboard and purchasing maple syrup only just before we used it in baking (though she has gotten the leftover syrup more than once even then). Her favourites then shifted to mostly fruit, almond milk (sweetened), whole wheat bread, almond butter, carrots and pea's, while she's at home. Though this doesn't sound too bad when you think of what she could be eating, it clearly indicates that she is still hunting, almost unknowingly, for sugar.

So, unless your trusted health professional has indicated it, don't feel too badly about not removing all the "easy sugar treats" from your house because it, at least in our case, didn't make any difference. The stealing continues, all that changes are the items of desire.There is something more to it and until we fix it at the source, putting them in a sugarless bubble is not realistic, nor does it allow them to practice self control once they have overcome these obstacles.

Disclaimer: Take this as coming from a person whose personal experience is strongly coloring their reaction. I've seen children who have been starved by parents who don't want them to "get fat" or just couldn't be bothered to feed them and the resulting food hording and gorging (even on horrible things like eating out of the trashcan and eating dry infant formula) behaviors even in toddlers that comes after that. And even an honest to goodness eating disorder in a preschooler from extreme food limiting and negative framing of it by a parent. So, I am sure that what I am feeling is probably much more to do with those experiences than anything else, but please, please consider re-framing for it yourself. I'm probably a bit (a lot) paranoid and way too soft on the discipline in this issue because of those past experiences.

What is the meal time and snacking policy of the household? Is there anything in the house that is actually communal food that she can access any time she wants? Is it stealing only when it is sweets she is trying to eat, or does all food require permission?

I actually do have a sweet tooth child who will eat all the chocolate chips, almond bark, holiday candy, actual sweets, powdered sugar, brown sugar--he's never tried drinking the pancake syrup to my knowledge, but if he ever thought of it, I'm sure he would. It is annoying to go to make chocolate chip pancakes and find that there are none left, or that he's mowed through all the candy when I think to want a piece a few days later. It's impulse control issues for him. He's severely ADHD, but really the worst we typically give him is a bit of guilt over it, 'those chocolate chip pancakes sure would have tasted good'--that sort of thing. The only times he's been punished about it is for leaving bits of food in unsanitary places (the emphasis then being on the mess) or the times he has gone into my room and pilfered through my drawers for my stash (the focus then being on the fact that he's not allowed in my room due to things he shouldn't be messing with). He has gotten better with it as he gets older (he turned 12 today), at about the same rate he's gained general impulse control.

Hmmm, we have the same problem with our 9yr old daughter, she has no dx (as of yet) but thanks to the internet I feel she has several 'traits' of AS and are waiting to see a specialist in august. However, one of the things she does is take/steal food from the pantry and hide the evidence around her bedroom. We are in NZ and the house we are renting is single story and typical here, the bedrooms run out of the kitchen……so whilst me & DH are in the lounge and she should be in bed, she is often raiding the cupboards!! ! Again, she will take the snack type foods but has, if nothing available, taken bottles of food coloring and a bag of chocolate icing sugar and mixed it with water to make a drink!! !! The problem is she denies it, despite the evidence being there and when asked why she does it she says 'i don't know'. Very frustrating…..I even found mouse droppings one day in her room as she had left a muffin wrapper on the floor…..now she puts the rubbish higher off ground!! !!

My son does the same thing. He hides food under his. Hide may be the wrong word. He just brings it to his room and eats. We ha (ve had many a quiet and loving discussion about this reassuring that food is available all the time and we are requesting that you eat them not in your bedroom but at the kithen table. He does not really try to hide because it is always under his bed. I don't see any attempt to hide. It appears it just a gesture of either being lazy or defiance. But anyway, nothing has worked so far. So I am trying this: everyday make him write this line:

I can eat anything I want - I cannot eat in my bedroom. Let's see what happens.

I have to admit that I have lot patience at times and yelled but I have been consistent about the message that we are not restricting food but the place.

Wish me luck!

I used to do more or less the same thing with sweets. I've always liked sweets, but my overeating really started after my mom had to move to a different state with my stepdad and half-sisters bcuz my stepdad found a new job. I was living with my dad and stepmom full-time, so I got to stay where I was, but for some reason, my stepmom got kind of mean around this time (almost as if she resented always having me around, but if I were her I probably would have hated having me around too) and it continued into my teen years, and it wasn't like school was much of a haven, so one of my first and foremost comforts became eating. It reminded me of being a small child again, when I was "good enough," when love was given without question, and when the two most important people in my world - my mom and dad - were together and always around right when I needed them.

Now that I'm in my 20s, I don't "graze" on unhealthy food as much as I did as a teenager, but I do have weight issues of my own. I do agree with the poster who suggested that emotional eating/depression/anxiety problems might be a contributing factor.

I'm not a parent, I am a 17 year old girl with Asperger's Syndrome who does this behaviour still. I can 100% confirm with you that it is a compulsion. If you see the food, you crave it. If you know it's there, you hunt for it. You know it's wrong, but you can't help yourself.

Lack of willpower makes it difficult to overcome this behaviour. You feel guilty as hell. I just stole a cornish pasty and I wish I could take it back.

I eat more when I am bored and I will most likely eat the food if someone points it out to me. So, rather than making a big fuss out of telling your kid not to eat something, say nothing and put it away out of sight. Also, keep them constantly occupied and consider sensitivity issues, keep the mouth and tastebuds occupied.

I wish I could tap into your brain for awhile because you remind me of my son. He takes food he is not supposed to eat. He says he knows it's wrong and doesn't want to do it, but that he can't help it. I know he is telling the truth. I believe that he can't help it, though I don't exactly understand what that means. Just the other day, he ripped a chunk out of a loaf of bread and ate it. He cried when I found it because he felt bad.

I have put "stop" signs on the pantry, the cupboards that have food in them, and the refrigerator to serve as a visual reminder. He also has unlimited access to gum. Can you recommend anything else that I can do to help him? He is developing a weight problem because of all of the...well....I guess the proper term for it is "binging." I don't know what to do to help him. Teaching him about nutrition and the health issues associated with overeating has not helped. I am at a loss...

I know this is an older post but we are having such a terrible time with my 11 year old son right now about this. It is so frustrating, and we too have tried everything. I was glad to see we are not the only ones.

An update on us...our pantry is now locked when I am not home. No "desirable food" is left where he can get it. We have a freezer in a lockable room that can be locked if we have things like ice cream. Each day, I leave specific after-school snacks out for him and his sister, but that is it. (Aside from fruit, which he is allowed to have whenever he wants)

It is still such a struggle.

Are you judging that based on her age, or her physical appearance? Because there are some girls who have their first signs of puberty as young as 8 or 9 - it's not even considered abnormal.

I am a self-diagnosed aspie woman and I used to do this all the time as a kid. I don't quite remember why- I think it may have been an anxiety related thing.
I also saved/hoarded money and whenever I was given some kind of treat I would try to save it or savour it for as long as possible. Maybe I didn't like the though of it being gone, or not having it. It drove my sister crazy because she would eat her treat or spend her money and I would always have mine or at least some left. (I still kind of like to save special foods, like valentine's or christmas chocolates, for a long time. It now drives my husband nuts. I think I just like the thought of knowing there is chocolate in the cupboard should I want some. Somehow that's more satisfying than eating it all at once... I don't really have to hide things though...my husband now knows not eat my saved treats! because... "I was SAVING that!" lol)
With the food hiding/stealing/hoarding- I think I stopped doing it in my parents' house. I remember one time something I had hidden caused us to have an ant problem and my mom was really upset. I also remember having a conversation about having an eating disorder or something but for me, it wasn't an eating disorder. I also remember my mother being concerned that I thought we wouldn't have enough food after learning about people starving etc. That might have been the case- I often developed anxieties when we learned about these kinds of things in school (nuclear bombs, diseases etc.). Anyway- I think I just stopped doing it. I don't remember if there was a resolution or if I just stopped.

My 2 yo daughter is already reminding me of how i used to do this with food. If she gets a treat or something, she savours it for soo long and often puts it in weird places for "later". I don't think she is really hiding it. She drives her big brother crazy because he gobbles yummy things up and she will be taking tiny bites or licks and making them last so long.

Why is it 'stealing' if its food in the household she lives in? Are you sure she is getting enough to eat? I mean for instance I know much of the time I can have trouble eating a full meal and have better luck snacking throughout the day....I guess I am curious why your child feels they have to hide it rather than just ask if they can have a snack....or is she used to no always being the answer whenever requesting extra food beyond what you feel was enough for her. I mean it seems like its something other than mis-behavior, especially if those dis-portion ate punishments to the actual 'crime' aka stealing of food in her own house aren't deterring it. No sweets, t.v or computer for a 'month' for a kid sneaking snacks....hmmm is this the sort of punishment applied to any mistake, maybe she feels the need to sneak because she's afraid of getting in trouble.

I didn't used to do that...But when I was a kid sometimes me and my sister, brother and cousin would plot to sneak into the kitchen and take food to eat in secret, when we spent the night together like at our grandmas or anywhere, can't remember if we actually ever managed to stay up till after the adults went to bed to actually carry out the plot...but with that it was just the thrill of potentially doing that and not getting caught...I think punishments may have been limited to having to clean up any messes made, apologize to grandma and maybe no desert that day however.

Last edited by Sweetleaf on 26 Mar 2015, 2:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.

^this....it is possible stimulants might stop weight going up too much, but that doesn't mean they are a healthy way to stay at the proper weight. Those kinds of drugs are draining in other ways...I don't know all the specifics but it seems stimulant drugs cause energy to be burnt and might drain some nutrients without causing noticable weight loss or malnutrution....are you making sure your daughter is getting all the vitamins and minerals she needs, like taking a vitamin every day as back up with her usual diet? It is likely very important to watch out for those things if she is on ongoing stimulant treatment.

Eating sugar releases serotonin and reduces anxiety and depression. Many people who eat too much sugary food are consciously or unconsciously attempting to self-medicate.

I've read about a rare disorder that makes people want to eat constantly because they never feel full, and they're allowed they can eat themselves to death.

I don't remember if I was doing it as a child (however I remember I was often looking for hidden sweets in the whole house because I was often getting sweet tooth and there was no sweets around) but I certainly do the "food stealing and hiding" thing now.

Why?

Because I don't want anyone to eat it before I can. The feeling I get when I go to the kitchen thinking: "Mmm, I am going to eat the chocolate that is stored in the cupboard." and find no chocolate there because mom got sweet tooth episode too is really upsetting. If I just keep the chocolate stored in my room there are no surprises like that because my mom won't find the chocolate so she won't eat it without me knowing and if she gets sweet tooth she will ask me if I have any chocolate and if I decide to give it to her I will know the chocolate is not there anymore so it won't take me by surprise when I get sweet tooth.

Perhaps the kids feel just like me?

In that case just let them store some food (give them the food and say "Hide it so only you know where it is."), making sure it's nothing that could go bad or attract pests. And for other stuffs make a spot in the fridge for the kids use and let them know you won't eat/throw away the food stored there without asking them first. You can't fix their food possessiveness. Especially not by punishments. In fact they only make it worse: I would certainly steal and hide more chocolate if my mom was punishing me by banning chocolate since I would know I might not be able to eat chocolate when I want unless I have it stored. Isn't it logical?
But you can control the behavior's effects by making sure that at least everything is stored properly.