Yep. Kids suck.

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I don't know that them (NTs) lacking social issues is the problem. I think at certain ages being rude is sadly a social skill. As much as people like to say nice and empathetic are social skills, I think that this is not necessarily the case specially with children. They often use rudeness to mark social caste and it seems that at certain ages it is the socially "advanced" ones are the ones who do it. They either originate it as a caste marker to emphasize their higher social status or go along with it because they understand the rules and consequences if they do not. There may be higher status empathetic, nice kids who do not have to play this game, but they are very few, it seems.

That does not mean kids don't suck. They often do, just that it does not mean lower social skills unless they do not outgrow it.

Bullying isn't just an NT/AS problem. A recent study showed that bullying isn't really about strong vs weak, it's about jockeying for a better social position: http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/10/us/ac-360-bullying-study

This means that kids like ours are going to get thrown under the bus. It does suck, but maybe it will help to know that the NT kids perpetrating this system are also suffering under it. DS was once (in preschool!) caught up in a bullying circle, and he was just as much a perpetrator as he was a victim - it was horrifying to me on so many levels. Parents finally approached the school, and they addressed it fairly simply (easier to do in preschool than middle school.) Nowadays, he is kind of the "mascot" because his disability is known so kids aren't bullying him in a way we can discern anyway.

There was just an excellent article on NPR on bullying that I highly recommend: http://www.npr.org/2013/02/19/172027445 ... online-too

My son is in middle school now. The abuse went from just being ignored to being invited to places just to get stood up or they show up and run off leaving him in a public place by himself. Other boys tell him that certain attractive popular girls like him so he goes over to them just to be laughed at.