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She kind of astounds me - she wanted to meet kids in the neighborhood so I went with her, and introduced her to kids of people I KNOW but she was like "Kids live here, I need to knock on their door." And I let her, I mean I don't want to impose my weird social anxieties on her, but she just walks right up to kids and says "Do you want to be friends?" and it totally works.

Is this how NTs make friends? I barely had any friends as a kid and it kind of was forced on me, I would've been mortified to walk up to a stranger and just ask if they want to be friends.

My dad is trying to help(I think he is accepting that I will never have kids and Amelie is a better pseudo grandchild than my dog) but he's bought her candy floss and soda every time that I let him take over for a few hours.

And that's probably fun for him, but she goes NUTS after all that sugar.

I also didn't think I could become so endeared to a child so quickly, I mean I've babysat before and I don't get all sappy and put their drawings on my walls but half of my living room now is just Amelie's artwork. I've literally taken down my own artwork and replaced it with hers, because I like it more.

I'm already trying to get her to read more and trying to do activities that are fun but cater to learning, I've always found it easier to just let kids do whatever they want as long as they follow certain safety rules and don't get out of my sight. Now I'm taking an active interest in her education - and it's like instinctive to do stuff to keep her safe.

It's... yeah. I don't even know. Are kids actually really wonderful and I've just been avoiding them so well I've managed to ignore this?

Yes, they really are wonderful.

Except when they aren't

There is just something very enriching about developing a bond with a child. Sometimes it is lovely and sometimes you want to pull your hair out, but either way your understanding of life seems to stretch a little. So ... I hope you have a wonderful summer

I am so glad this is working better for you, now. Some NT kids are very outgoing like that, but not all. They have their own personalities just like aspies and autistic children do. They just do different things. When I go to my son's school and see all the NT children-- what they do amazes me in so many ways b/c it has been so long since I have been around a large quantity of NT children. They are interesting when they are young, and before they get too clique-like. I do not think I will like them too much after that. Well, at least I did not like that growing up, anyway.

LOL, yes, exactly!

Having worked with kids for most of my life before I had one (and I'm still volunteering at DS's elementary school) they are all amazing. The key to enjoying it is to try to do it mostly on your own terms the way you're doing now.

You sound like an excellent caregiver and your cousin is lucky to have you.