i think my son may be gay

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I wouldn't even push the subject with him. He might be unsure of his sexuality at this point.

There are people who wonder whether they are gay at age 18 or so but who turn out to be heterosexual, so it is just a matter of time and discovery for the boy.

I believe the OP has left the forum so any advice offered may not be received, although the thread may serve a purpose for others.

Probably gay from your description. He'll come out when he's comfortable doing so. There's no set internal coming out clock. The more he feels comfortable that you're Ok with it, the more likely he'll disclose it sometime. You Could do both of you a favour and when there's some appropriate time to mention being Ok with lgbt people, drop a comment so he knows you're not homophobic and will accept him as he is if he is gay and tells you so. Could be as simple as a comment about some gay tv show characters, or about Pride during that time of year if you see gay party stuff advertised - doesn't have to be much.. could be as simple as "Nice time of year, good to see people celebrating being their authentic selves." He might realize full well Why you dropped that comment, but so what ? He'll get the message that you're not gonna freak and kick him out of your family or anything.

You could also be more direct and simply ask if he and his friend are dating and see how he reacts besides getting embarrassed lol - tell him you were just curious if you needed to set another place for Christmas dinner or what ?? Only you know your relationship with your son and what the best way to approach the topic is.

Or you could just wait and let him say what he wants when he wants to. But if you intentionally ignore it, he may have anxiety over coming out that you could help eliminate by indicating in some way or another that you're Okay with it if he is gay.

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