Frustrated With Picky Eating

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I've never heard of a kid dieing because they didn't get a certain food. I'm sorry, but back fifty years ago a child trying to dictate what he ate, when he ate, ect. would get his tail tanned. So much blame is put on this AS disorder it's almost ridiculous, and everyone is saying 'you can't punish him, he has a mental disorder'. But with that attitude, how can you expect him to learn? Yes he has a disorder, yes he'll be picky; accept it, and love him, but don't use it as a crutch for every single thing he does.

Maybe this is just me being an NT, maybe I don't understand how hard it is to control aspie kids, but I don't believe in kids controlling their parents.

Yes, Goche, your NTness is showing. Having lived as a picky eater, with very strict parents that didn't do special food I know it's not a crutch. I developed eating disorders and poor eating habits because I was so limited. I was forced "just a bite" and barfed my entire lunch. Worth it, eh? That will show the little brat to refuse her cole slaw.
I was severely underweight as a child, developed anemia as a teen. I was made fun of for being so skinny as a child, it made me ugly among a culture of fat people that stuffed their faces with whatever. When I ate sensibly, they teased me because it was different from them.
Now I eat just about everything I can and am about 40-50 pounds overweight. I won't shame my son over food. I won't shame him for being autistic.

I hardly think packing a sandwich and apple and telling him to eat it is being a cruel parent. A child could die from a insufficient diet, and a few pieces of chicken and some cheese just have the sussinence for someone to live on. If nothing else he'll become weak and unhealthy. Even the chicken is so processed it's basicly useless. One kid in America nearly died of scurvey because he wouldn't eat anything but oatmeal and his parents didn't do anything about it! Low potassium causes complete paralsis, including the diaphram, and most doctors don't test for vitamin deficiences.

Maybe there is a middle ground. Like grinding fresh chicken and making homemade nuggets. Same with french fries, chop them up, fry them in canola oil, and use a light dusting of salt. Mashed potatoes are easy to swallow without chewing, same tenique can be used for 90% of other vegitables. A little vitamins are lost in boiling, but a multivitamin will take care of that. Cook rice with chicken broth for more nutrients.

I was referring to "tanning" a child's hide for their lacking to eat what was given. And you're missing the point. It's not just about providing something they "should" like but whether they can stomach it. Picky isn't always about liking or disliking. It's often textures and smells that can nauseate. Crunchiness that induces fear or pain.
I don't know about most doctors, our doctor tested my son for vitamin deficiency during his annual physical and he was fine on his crazy autistic diet.

You're missing the point. I was saying he could try some different foods. If he throws a fit, demands what he likes, and threatens to not eat unless he gets what he wants, give him a spanking and send him to bed. If he tries it and gets sick is a completely different scenario. Then it becomes thanks for trying and give him a treat he does like. All children go through this, I had to be taught to eat my vegetables, I didn't like them but I ate them. ((Now I like them)) Things I got sick to like liver, or es cargo (sp?) weren't served again.

Believe it or not, I'm much more lenient than my mom would be...

aspie or NT, everyone here is picky in their own way....foods can't touch...i have one flexetarian ( sometimes eats meat, sometimes doesnt), one meat and potato eater, one who has to pour ketchup on everything, one who won't eat veggies....

But foods are not supposed to touch that's what the plates with compartments on them are for

We definitely do picky around here

I have a lot of issues with how food feels, so I'm limited with some food quirks of my own. Junk food is my only "always safe" food, unfortunately. Thankfully my kids aren't that way. I always supply something nutritious for the family, and encourage them to enjoy good snacks lke apple slices with peanut butter to dip them in.

My aspie daughter, who is four, used to eat anything and everything. There wasn't a thing she didn't try. That's changing now, and she is becoming picky.

My son, who is turning two soon, is only now beginning to accept food more solid than baby food. For the longest time, if I would put something in his mouth that wasn't baby food, he'd force it out with his tounge, spit repeatedly and swat at his mouth. We had to wait until HE was ready, there was just no other way of it.

Boy, where do I start...

For me it's not the texture. Things just taste BAD to me. I have no idea why but they just do, and I cannot eat them. I can't even pretend to like them, the force of my tastebuds (two words?) is that strong.

However, my family (no brothers or sisters) (btw, I'm 15 but contributing to the topic) are all vegetarian. Not vegan, we still have dairy products and stuff like that, but no meat. Except tuna. I LOVE tuna.

I read this article recently, which says that it's all about the flavor. The reason why vegetables taste good in restaurants is because they're cooked for only a very short time, with a lot of butter and salt. Is it healthy? No. But it sure makes vegetables taste better. A lot of people overcook the vegetables, which takes out a big part of the flavor (not to mention a big part of the vitamins). So in the end, vegetables don't taste good, and kids refuse to eat them. For most of my life, I didn't always enjoy eating cooked vegetables, unless I put butter, salt, soy sauce, and/or shredded cheese on them. Now, I just cook frozen vegetables in a saucepan with canola oil on the bottom, stirring periodically; toward the end of cooking time, I add some soy sauce. Tastes great.

Also, what about fresh vegetables? I mean things like cucumbers, tomatoes, carrots, or anything else, for that matter. They have plenty of natural flavor, although adding a dash of salt makes them taste a little better. Have you tried offering fresh vegetables to your kids? After all, if they're refusing to eat boiled vegetables (and even at 24, I still don't really like the flavor) there's nothing wrong with offering them fresh ones as a substitute. And it's not even a true substitute, since you're offering the same food item.

And on a side note, I'm wondering if the refusal to eat vegetables is an American thing. If you're from anywhere outside of North America, add your comments about how kids react to vegetables in your country. I'm interested in knowing whether it really is an American thing, or something that crossed all cultural and political borders.