Kids say the darndest things

Post Reply New Topic

Awww, I'm loving all the cute quotes.

When my son was a toddler, I put him to bed with a comment about his day. One time, after a particularly good day, I told that he was a good boy. He responded with "you're a good boy, too, Daddy".

Oh, this from his recent birthday party:

"Sarcasm is the key to present etiquette."

Willaful - love that one.

DS got the Diary of a Wimpy kid DIY book and proudly showed it to DH; I wish I could show you the picture he drew of our family - it is hysterically accurate down to my slight belly-bulge, but in the exact style of the books.

However, my husband and I were rolling on the floor when we read, under "Predict the Future:" I will not get cotton candy.

I don't have any children of my own, but my mother frequently blathers on about 'funny' things my brother and I have said/done. Personally, I think they're quite logical.

Aged approximately 3 years:
At a Church nursery group, discussing Noah's Ark.
Preist: And so God made a rainbow.
Me: No, he did not.
Preist:Yes, he did, how else would the rainbow have got there?
Me: When it rains the sun's rays hit the droplets and a "prison" is made, obviously.
Preist: Well, technically, you're right, but God still made the rainbow.
Me: Clearly, God did not make the rainbow.
Apparently, I become somewhat irrate over his misconception and ended up being removed from the church by my mother.

"Prison" = prism, btw.

And, last year, as a 14-year-old, when I really should have learnt to keep my mouth shut:
In a PSCHE class, where my teacher said that all opinions were valid and we were entitled to say them.
Teacher: What do you think about the earthquake in Haiti?
Me: The Haitian earthquake was a result of tectonic plate movement by convection currents, although it could be considered nature's way of reducing the quanity of excess living things.
Teacher: You cannot talk of culling humans like animals.
Me: As proven by my statement, I have the physical capability of doing so.
Teacher:Well, you shouldn't, humans are precious.
...
Teacher:Are you going to reply any time soon?
Me: Given the current exponential growth, humans are unlikely to become extinct in the near future.
Teacher:But, you can't go around talking about culling them like animals.
Me: I can, and demonstrated my ability to do so.
Teacher: But you shouldn't, it isn't right to talk about killing humans as if they were just animals.
Me: Humans are animals, and what makes humans more important that any other species?
(More inane waffling from my teacher. After which I decided to ignore her.)

So, I informed my mother, who then started to explain why certain thoughts should remain in one's head (a conversation I have somewhat frequently).
Me: If she had asked me my opinion on how I felt about the earthquake, I would have answered accordingly. (Admittedly, I don't see the point in aid, but I do have a rough idea of what I'm supposed to say in response.)

My mother then found it funny and uses it as an example of how literal I am to my teachers and her friends, and suggested that if my teachers didn't recieve the desired answer, they should rephrase the question.

IDK that this example is so funny - but I realized something about literal speech. When we cross the street, we always told my son "look both ways" not "make sure there are no cars coming towards you" Can't tell you how many times we've had to pull him back from oncoming traffic after he dutifully looked in both directions...just now figured out the reason why. Duh.

One of my young friends Alex, who I only see every other week, said this this past summer:

"There was a hurricane last week, and guess what? Its name was Alex." Followed by a gigantic smile.

I don't see how that last example was taking things literally (about Haiti). It seems like your teacher is a liar, or freedom of speech is a lie.

Brandon, my son is in grade 2... He is learning about mammals...

he says last week...

"bats shoot eggs so they are llamas."

When I was a kid, a young kid, my friends and I used to get in some real trouble. I wrote a post about it that I thought many of you would enjoy (although I haven't been in these forums in months). You can read it here: http://lifepenned.wordpress.com/2010/11 ... -gasoline/

Yes, I am shamelessly plugging my own blog, but only this one post. Many of you enjoyed my stuff in the past. I hope you all get a good laugh. God knows the most of us can use one.

I hope you are all doing well.

Our 3 year old before school today told me "Mommy all the kids are dead" I was shocked of course so asked why he thought that..... He looked at me and said "ugh, because they don't have any batteries"..... Needless to say I was relieved that was where he was going with the idea!! !! LOL

I agre kids do say the darndest things