Freaked out by AS/HFA diagnosis, mixed advice

Post Reply New Topic

Thanks again to everyone for the incredible wisdom you are sharing here.

I have been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster with this and the experiences and ideas you are posting are both profoundly moving and truly helpful.

I met with the psychotherapist and discussed his concerns.

He repeated his belief that classification was potentially very harmful. He also suggested that there was a complicated funding issue behind the school's push to have him diagnosed and classified--if he is classified, his supports get paid for out of a state budget, if he is not, the burden falls on the school district, already in a budget crisis. He wanted to see the child study team evaluation and the assessment results, and said he was not averse to accommodations like keyboarding or other in-class supports.

I had a long conversation with my boy tonight, and asked him about his friends.

He feels that he does not understand people. They think he is weird and he is often uncomfortable because he does not know how to respond--he has no friends at school and uses engages in solitary activity during recess. He feels that there is something different about his relationships with his friends than their relationships with others... so the whole AS idea is making more sense to me know.

I found the specialists, teachers and administrators at his school to be caring and thoughtful and as I read about what many others have gone through with unsympathetic schools, I feel profoundly grateful.

I feel like I have arrived at basecamp and I'm looking up at K-2 or Everest--or maybe I went for a little morning bodysurfing only to find myself caught in a tsunami.

Thanks again to everyone.

It's a strange thing to look at everything that's going on in my boy's life through this lens. I find myself asking is this just one of those things, or is it an expression of ASD?

Over the weekend he was hanging out with friends playing video games. All good. Then the wanted to ride bikes and skateboards. I had a chat with one of his friends who had a new skateboard and our conversation went from longboard tricks to go pro videos to gliding. Aviation is a interest of mine, but not my son and he became a bit agitated when his friend and I began discussing gliding... "Dad," he said, "I don't care about that." Then they went out to ride.

Looking out window, I noticed He was having some trouble coming up the steep hill and went out to remind him he had a massive range of gears. Then he took off again. When he next came back to the house I knew something was wrong. He had an inward look and was visibly tense. He began to make an odd sort of strangled cry. I asked him what was wrong and he told me his chest was tight. Then described the symptoms of a panic attack. I asked him what was wrong and he said the gears on his new bike were too confusing.

After I hugged him for a while and got him a glass of water, he told me this happens to him in school about twice a week.

I met with his teacher this morning discuss it.

It's good not to be flying completely blind with this.

It breaks my heart to sim him suffer.

I had another meeting with the therapist.

I may be on or near the spectrum myself. The therapist is now OK with the IEP, and says I can share my experiences with my own quirky life to help my son. He is also suggesting that I may need anti-anxiety meds to help deal with certain issues I have about using the telephone.

Curious how everything is changing while remaining the same.

I guess we are all going to be OK. Thanks again, everyone, for your kind and thoughtful responses.

and my father did too.

It is interesting to rethink his famously bad temper in terms of meltdowns--also his need for long periods of solitude and his intense focus and concentration. He was a successful writer and those characteristics served him well.

-17 year old Aspie

-Still has bad handwriting

-Still types everything

-Still doesn't know how to tie his shoes

Honestly; I'd say take the IEP.

What does "Great conversationalist" refer to? If the AS diagnosis is correct; then it's likely just going on about his interests. Basic social situations on the other hand are far more difficult. The sensory issues are also there (Perfume also isn't a good idea).