Kids say the darndest things

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(My son offering me a whoopi cushion.) "Mommy, blow-up poopy balloon!"

My boys have a whole introduction when they meet someone they like "WHo are you What's your name? I'm Joshua and this is my twin brother Noah

My kids vocabularily is allot based on the shows the watch they will name random kids stuff based on who they think they are like in there favorite shows

I love you mummy, especially when your not angry

"Got too much money? There's an app for that!"

Many years ago when my teenager was 4, she was riding in the car with me and suddenly shouted, "Mommy! That sign said 'No Passing' and you passed it!"

I can remember doing some interesting things as a little girl. The most memorable by far is when I was about three.

A family friend had been coming over every morning and then not leaving till nightfall, This happened for several weeks, I had a cold at the time and just wanted to have a nice quiet house... But my mom and the friend would talk and get fairly loud. I finally got sick of it and went into the kitchen and looked them both in the faces and said: "This is MY house and that is MY momma, i never get to be alone with her anymore, go away!" then I marched out of the room and plopped onto the couch and scooped up my kitty to cuddle with. The family friend left not long after that and my mom came in to tell me that I was really rude.

I just wanted to sit in her lap and have her read to me. >.>

My son was pretending to play the drums, tapping along with music on TV. The Big Bang Theory theme music came on, and it starts out pretty slow, but them it speeds up.

When it got to the fast part, he shouted, "No, music! Slow down, music! Stop going fast!"

My son went to public school this morning. I asked whether I should take his picture.
He said, "NO!", and walked away.

He didn't realize I was joking.
As usual I forgot to put inflection in my voice or to smile.

This morning the 5 year old boy I babysit said, "Mum says that dad takes all of her money." Me: Why? Child: "Because he leaves the lights on everywhere around the house."

My boy loves the movie "Cars". He was sitting on my lap last night making car noises, so I joined him.

He said, "I'm the race car! Are you the combine?"

I replied, "No, I'm the pretty Carrera car."

He paused for a second, then said, "No, you're not pretty."

Between me and my 2 year old nephew (we were watching some Simon's Cat):

Nephew: More cat!
Me: What's the magic word?
Nephew: *thinks for a bit* Cat!

Strangely, it worked.

Just had to share an email I received from my Aspie son this morning:

DEAR DAD.I HOPE I HAVE A GOOD TIME AT CAMP TODAY.THANK YOU FOR SETTING UP OUR TRAP.
SPEAKING OF TRAP,MUM AXENDENTLY FELL IN OUR TRAP.SHE WAS VERY MAD BUT SHE FORGAVE ME.
HAVE A HAPPY DAY DAD.

Context: he was annoyed with his siblings coming into his room without asking, and tried to resolve the problem by setting trip wires! I helped him change it to a harmless string that pulled something noisy onto the floor.

Lol, the stuff in this thread is so funny xD.

I'm a 17 year old Aspie guy, so I don't have any kids as of yet. I do however have a small story to share with all.

Basically, my mom asked what I wanted to be when I grew up.

I responded along the lines of "I wanna be a mom!"

(My dad was generally out for work, so I guess I didn't take much of a liking to him...)

DyS & DmS* wanted to see the new movie "Frankenweinie" (sp?)
Knowing that both are very sensitive to the deaths of furry family members I told them honestly that the dog could only become a "Frankenstein" if it died.

DmS nodded sagely to indicate that he knew the movie would not be a good idea.
DyS looked absolutely striken and proclaimed "I'll put on my Diamond Armor to protect myself from the infection of the dog dying!"


* Dear youngest Son (Aspie/HFA - just turned 8yrs) & Dear middle Son (Aspie - now 9 1/2 yrs)