"Can I call you Dad?."-Z's story

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Corsarza,

Thanks for the encouragement. It is good to find someone who understands the religious stuff. We are doing well, other than a little lonely at times. I am learning to trust God with this though. ( I actually spent an evening with a friend of mine from our old church, we were able to avoid "church" stuff and have a good time visiting as friends and fellow moms. It was very refreshing.)

I believe I have finally found some local help for me and my son. A lady gave me a number for a special education nurse at a nearby health department. She was very sweet and was willing to help point me in the right direction with some referrals and school advocacy stuff. I will be meeting with her next week and I am looking forward to talking face to face with someone who knows what steps I need to make.

I also made some doctors appointments for Cris. We have an appointment with an optometrist to see if he needs glasses. I also made an appointment with a new pediatritian to do a well child check up and talk about his bowel problems. Then on Friday we have another visit with the pychiatrist.

I sent Cris to school Friday without the adderal. It was interesting, his teacher sent a note home saying he had a terrible time getting any work done but that he seemed happy. When he got home from school his face looked so different, he really was happy and had a lighter look to his face. Well, the weekend has been interesting too, he has been nuts! Crazy, flighty, flitting from one thing to the other, can't sit still, has gotten into lots of fights with siblings, but seems happy. At least I have some stuff to talk about with the psychiatrist. Taking him off has made the effects more obvious, the good and bad.

amoseli, I do understand the feeling of loneliness, I think everybody on this sight feels it to some degree. I understand that by losing your church home you have lost a type of family. I literally did lose my first family but had it replaced by this marvelous mess I now call my family, Cor, Z, S and one dumb dog. Remember you do have your family and you have your faith, both will be of infinite help in seeing you through whatever difficult times you may face. Trust an old man in this.

I am so glad that you are seeing some progress in getting help for Cris. Please remember that Cris is not "wrong" he just precieves things differently than NTs . Dealing with Z I sometimes wonder if his perceptions are not actually better.

Regarding medications, a medication that works for one person will not always work for another. Z's dx is ADHD and Aspergers, he takes Adderal, seroquell, and celexa. We have tried other meds, some with terrible results. He also has asthma and one of his breathing treatment meds actually made his ADHD worse, and he is almost off the scale. There is no pill that will "cure" As. Working with him to understand himself and others is what you need to do. As a corallary to this you will have to teach others about this part of the Autism spectrum, there are a lot of ignorant know-it-alls out there. Continue to work on getting a firm dx. Arm youself, you will have to fight the good fight for your son.

Keep in touch and lets know how we may help. That's why we are here.

Hi Corsarzs - hope you all are doing well and you come back to post soon.

Hi Goku, I'm on my way. things are beginning to settle down a little. I'll see you around.

Check out Having children and see if i was too abrubt, my second post on that thread. Thanks.

LOL - feeling feisty? That's comical - asking me about tact. Good to have you back. He's young still and doesn't have the gift of perspective that you do. It's both a blessing and a curse - and a source of frustration.

I remember years ago telling someone who was unsure about having children that there wasn't a rule that said you had to and if she really wasn't interested she should do the world a favor and pass because it was alot of work and there was enough unwanted children already.

I have a real knack for uncensored advice. Foot-in-mouth disease. You, on the other hand, couldn't be more tactful. But you're only human - you're allowed a few lapses. Blame it on a senior moment.

[quote="Corsarzs"/]

amoseli, I do understand the feeling of loneliness, I think everybody on this sight feels it to some degree. I understand that by losing your church home you have lost a type of family. I literally did lose my first family but had it replaced by this marvelous mess I now call my family, Cor, Z, S and one dumb dog. Remember you do have your family and you have your faith, both will be of infinite help in seeing you through whatever difficult times you may face. Trust an old man in this. [/quote]
Thank you for this encouragement.

[quote/]
I am so glad that you are seeing some progress in getting help for Cris. Please remember that Cris is not "wrong" he just precieves things differently than NTs . Dealing with Z I sometimes wonder if his perceptions are not actually better. [/quote]
I have a feeling I will need to be reminded of this over and over to change an old mind set. Thanks!

Hmm... I'm not sure about this quote stuff!

I am determined to make an appointment for myself. I am positive I have ADD. It is making it very hard to cope with everything. I have had a hard time for a long time, but didn't realize it is not the norm to have a totally cluttered life where I have no time management skills and feel extremely stressed all the time and even have panic attacks in certain situations. My husband has done all the grocery shopping for the 10 years we have been married because I get so overwhelmed with the task. I also get sooo distracted that it is hard to have a conversation with me sometimes. I have battled with depression the past couple of years as well. Things are finally turning a corner. Yeah!

Thanks, Goku, I love my senior moments. personal opinion, tact is overated when truth is a better answer.

Do make that appointment, and don't get so distracted that you forget to keep it.
When I took the Adult Leader training course called Woodbadge for Boy Scouts our Troop Guide was a fantastic Lady dxd as ADHD. She had so much energy she left us all panting trying to keep up. Seriously, therapy of some kind can be very beneficial for anyone, I have been there I know. It helped me put things in perspective when my life was torn apart. It also helped keep me alive. Long story and I won't go there here, but you may find some very valuable help if you need it. Cor won't let me shop alone without a list [ I bring home too much junk] she says you're lucky to have a husband you can trust.

Keep me posted.

wow you have your woodbadge kudos to you , not enough people volunteer, or have volunteered in the past.

Thank you DingoDV, I was an absolutely wonderful experience. I was an Assistant Scoutmaster for about 12 years and a Cub leader for 3. I hope to get back into it when Z turns later this year. We tried Cub Scouts with him but that was when we were having real troubles. Since he was dxd he has made vast improvements understanding himself and wants to try Boy Scouts. I love the program. We also plan on getting S into Girl Scouts.

If you want some interesting reading try [/u]Bayden Powel, Two Lives of a Hero, then tell me if he was NT, Maybe not on the Autism spectrum but, my opinion not typical at all. [hmmm, i'm going to have to dig it out and read it again.

I've definitely read things and heard things that suggest he was not your typical kind of person, but I think that is evident in his out of the box thinking he exhibited in the Siege of Mafeking ,

Scouting is definitely something I have gained a great deal out of, and now am starting to place back some of what I have taken.
Quite by coincidence I'm off to Gilwell Park in a few minutes for World Jamboree IST training so I'll see you in coupel of days.

Have a great time I'll be looking forward to hearing from you.

Actually, I'd say it's obvious that God is autistic. He doesn't talk to anyone, or look them in the eyes; in the Old Testament, He only allowed a few people to even be in His presence; and everything in the Universe, from the hugest galaxy to the tiniest subnuclear particle, spins.

Very astute observations. Hmmmmm?? The Bible says in the end times men will have a form of godliness but deny the power therof...could that be what NTs are doing?

I love it when someone makes a statement that shakes traditional thinking.

Smelena, still trying to catch up on what I've missed over the last couple of weeks. Thank you for telling us about yourself and UbbyUbbyUbby Didn't mean to ignore you.

I find the food intolerance interesting, one of my former Scouts was gtuten intollerant and displayed other characteristics which I now think may have been AS or HFA. His other problem was he came from a wealthy background and it was easier for his parents to let him have his way than to try to help him cope with his problems. There was another boy, with very similar characteristics whose parents did everything they could to help him deal with his issues. The second boy achieved Eagle Rank and the first languished in a sea of self pity. Wish I had known more then, maybe I could have been more helpful.

I definitely understand about the intollerant teachers who are convinced they have all the answers. Sometimes I think shooting is too good for them, slow roasting over multiple Aspie meltdowns might do them some good though .

Is "Dad" Aspie or does he show strong similar traits in other areas?

Definitely helps when someone can point you in the right direction. I wish more teachers were able to do so.

Go ahead and ask for that autograph, that would one way to say "thank you for all you have done for us".

Tears are a part of the Parental Condition and never need to be apologozed for, however I hope all of your future tears will be tears of joy over Ubby's predicted successes [With a mother like you I predict multitudes of them].

I'm so glad you will hassle the teachers, they need it to be really aware of what is happening to their students. Please remember, when you find a good one to thank them, they hear that all too seldom. [sorry about that, we still have to remind Z about his manners. Force of habbit.]

Thank you for sharing your story. I really enjoyed getting to know you and your son better. I'll be seeing you around on WP, I'm glad you are here.

Now before this thread dies out, is there anyone out there who would like to keep the ball rolling? I hope so!

I'm stubborn and nosey. I'm also sure there are others who have stories to share,
How about it?