IEP Woes- Should the school provide counseling ?

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My son's IEP is in the process of being written up. He is 10 and it took me 3 long years to finally get him some help. The school kept saying he was too smart to get an IEP, and meanwhile the behaviour tests all said he was "clinically significant" or "at risk" in all areas. After a change of jobs, getting laid off, moving, and 3 changes of insurance I had a private psychologist evaluate him. He was diagonosed with AS, ADHD Major Depression and Mild Anxiety. Now the school is finally listening!! Except his teacher, who is saying she doesn't think he has AS because he is too "aware of himself" and sometimes" joins in". She also says he's rude (all other adults say he is so polite). OK, that is a whole other issue which maybe I'll post in another thread titled "Teacher Woes"!
What I really want to know is, is there some kind of IEP rule which says the school is required to provide counseling? My son's biggest problems are with low self esteem, poor social skills and depression. The school has a part time cousellor who only does whole class anti-bullying lessons, not personal therapy. We have insurance but it is limited, and we would still have to pay for sessions. And we are a low income family (entitled to free lunch- which we don't have because of GFCF diet and super finicky eating- OK thats probably another thread).
Thanks for any insight - feel free to ramble ! !
By the way we live in Seattle WA

I wonder if it depends on the school, because my AS son's IEP's have always been behavior based. My son was once in therapy but Medicaid would only pay for 6 sessions. I put him in a social skills class at a child psych's but Medicaid wouldn't pay for that saying it fell under the heading of "education." The best thing I've accomplished for my son is sensory breaks during the day. They had to see the result of not allowing him breaks before they got on board. Your son's teacher has no business re-diagnosing your son.

In our area, we are advised that if you really want the school to provide something then you phrase it as a safety risk. For counselling you would use a phrase like "Needs counselling because child is at risk of serious poor self / at risk of negative self image / at risk of depressive episodes...." Schools are required to be "safe" places for children. If you can turn whatever you want into a safety hazard then you can fight for it.

My son reacted to the teasing and bullying in 5th grade with beating and scratching his own face. That woke them up.

I would check to find out whether Washington is a state where you can get MA for your child - either because they recognize children with disabilities as a "family of one" for these purposes, or because your income might be low enough. If he qualifies for MA, that would give you an additional insurance possibility for covering counseling. The other thing I would check out is agencies that provide counsing on a sliding scale basis, with little or no cost for low income families.

There are two reasons that I would recommend these options, if they are possibilities, prior to looking to the school for counseling. First, I'm not sure I would trust the school to provide quality counseling to my child - there is an inherent conflict of interest if the school is providing counseling and there are issues arising out of the school environment (bullying, poor teachers, improper follow-through on IEP's). You want the counseling environment to be a safe place for your child - there should be no concern that the counselor will have divided loyalties, will "make excuses" for the school when s/he shouldn't, or will be trying to "blame" the family for issues that are not the family's fault (for that matter, do you really want the school having information about possible family issues that may be bothering your son?).

The other reason that I would be concerned about having school provide the counseling is that he would then be receiving counseling on the basis of the school's calendar, rather than according to his need for it - there would be no counseling over the summer (in all probability - and if there were, in the form of ESY, would he have the same counselor? If not, it would be pointless) or during school breaks. That might be fine, but you don't want to have to depend on it!

Hi,
Good for you for advocating for your son with a private consultation since the school has its own financial and time constraints. You are your child's best advocate. My rule of thumb has always been to try to keep your child's teachers and administrators on your side. Ask for more input from the teacher as to how to help your child. "Rudeness" is actually a sign of AS because the child is forthright, showing a misunderstanding of social cues. And her observation that he is "aware" of himself shows is his somewhere on the spectrum. Unfortunately, the teacher may see that he appears to be able to see another's point of view when actually he can't. He may appear to be defiant when he is actually anxious. Ask your state education department for your rights as a parent of a child with a learning difference. They will send you the link or hard copy of your child's educational rights and you can the begin slogging through the steps to getting an evaluation and then mediation if you disagree with their findings. Ask around for anyone in your area who will help advocate for your child's IEP meeting. You will need people on your side of the "team". Look locally for an autism advocate. Press on and good for you to ask for help.

School here can't provide counceling by law, just like the nurse can't give out aspirin. School personel can't practice medicine. The councelors can do some diagnostic testing, but they can't treat. We do have an autism program that offers social skills training and a quiet lunch room for the kids. Kids in that program have people keeping tabs on them in regards to bullying and so on. My eldest son is in it, but my middle son who also has AS, ADHD and is at risk for depression can't get an IEP for that. I think they are supposed to do it, but they are refusing to because his grades are good. They say that they only provide services if the child's grades are affected and that his mental health and development is my problem not theirs.

You might want to check into what your local school system is legally obligated to do. You might also get better quality counceling out of school than in school.

Our school put counseling in my son's IEP but with the budget cuts to the service he ended up seeing a counselor once a month and it was worthless. They can only work with what they have available, unless there is something extreme going on, and what was available through the school was clearly impacted and over-booked.

But ... where there is a will, there is a way, and around 4th grade we were so worried about his anxiety and moods that we brought it all up again at the IEP and asked a zillion questions until someone had a solution: the IEP team wrote a referral to a county non-profit mental health project, which then intervened with my son, creating a special group for him and some other kids. That group took nearly a year to get into place, but it was a solid choice and really effective. When we got to middle school and the report from the project came in, the specialist stared at me and asked, "how did you get so lucky to get in with them?" Lol, well ... I've found that if you can get the entire IEP team to recognize an issue, and if they believe in you as a parent, they will stretch for you. What they want to know is that if they go the extra mile, it will make a real difference. There may not always be an extra mile that can be found, but do your best to make sure they know that whatever they do for you, you'll run with and multiply.

Same deal here sort of, in 8th grade it was laughing while punching myself in the face. I was purposely hit in the face with a ball during "free time" in a "gifted/advanced academics" class and asked "are you okay?" (sarcastically). I answered "do I LOOK okay?" *smack* "do I LOOK okay?" *smack*. I only stopped when I had two guys holding my arms behind my back. When the bell rang I went on to my algebra class as normal. I had an assistant principal visit me and he apparently was surprised that I seemed okay despite obviously disturbing an entire class less than 20 minutes before. Apparently several of my peers had come forward including one girl who was across the entire room (this was a LARGE classroom) on the phone at the time who claimed that I was punching myself so hard it sounded like I was right next to her. Mission accomplished, as far as I was concerned at the time.

Back on topic though, your son could use an IEP. One of the main conditions of my IEP based on the above situation and similar outbursts was that I could walk out of class and speak to a guidance counselor whenever I felt like it. If any teacher tried to stop me they could legally be fired for it. My school had 4 guidance counselors, one for each grade and they changed grades with the students (very nice system IMO). I also could visit a man who was in charge of an after-school "attitudes" program among other things, I forget his actual job title though. I had weekly appointments with a (I believe) school psychologist, who like your son's teachers didn't agree with me being AS because I was too highly functioning and because I did practice good eye contact with her (which I did because I do that with everyone I trust and respect).

The public high school I attend provides diagnosis and ongoing counseling. It includes social advice, pragmatic speech therapy, and academic help (such as contacting the teachers of kids who aren't very assertive and can't ask for help.. )

I am a special education high school teacher. Goals drive the placement for your student so you will need to request that the team write goals that would need counseling. IE: Addressing a behavior, dealing with depression etc. Once the goal is written the IEP team will have to decide how to meet that goal and generally that will involve some form of ongoing counseling. The behavior will have to be impacting his education. With most AS students their behavior does so its a natural fit to write it in the IEP or Behavior Support Plan this way. Hope that helps

We will be requesting counseling in our ODS' IEP, once we get one. The school is evaluating him next week and we are paying for a private evaluation that will be complete by the end of September as well. There are several counseling sessions that I want our ODS placed in that I know the school offers: Taking control group, Let's be friends group (social skills), Conflict management group, and possibly Hands are not for hitting group. I want those written into his IEP in addition to ST for pragmatic speech issues and OT for sensory sensitivities and fine motor skills.