Inappropriately touching himself

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Hello all.
I’m at a total loss and am turning to y’all for help.
My step son is 15 years old. He is high functioning.
He has a history of touching himself in public... both adjusting and rubbing. He once ejaculated in his classroom (age 13)
He is now rubbing himself in public.
Today I walked into my living room to find him doing this on the chair.
I’m just the step mom and I completely understand that.
My husband says “well he forgot”
And spoke with him again about private’s in private places.
This is a continual problem
His mom and dad (my husband) continue to say... “he forgets”

I’m wondering if this is normal?
If anyone else has had this issue? If so how did you handle it?

I’m so fearful of all the situations you can image happening. I feel so helpless.

Thanks in advance!

Tell him to just do it in his room....that the living room is off limits for that kind of stuff.

And keep reinforcing it

So he doesn’t “forget.”

No, it’s not “normal” for anybody to masturbate in public.

He’s high-functioning. He should know there’s a time and place for everything.

Don’t present it as shameful. Just say that other people don’t want to see him doing that stuff. And that he could be arrested for this. And that it’s inappropriate all around.

Present this as something practical, rather than presenting masturbation as a mortal sin.

Children who never learn self-control or self-discipline are often headed for a difficult adulthood.

Kraftiekortie is correct to suggest setting limits and insisting they be observed. Success in implementing this sort of strategy may pave the way for helping him learn self-discipline in other area.

Stimming without realizing it is normal; sexualized contact is not. Perhaps this is a version of stimming, but when it came to things my son was doing that could have potentially gotten him in trouble with the law someday, I never pulled any punches. I would tell your step son that at his age, were he to do this in public (or in front of younger children, etc), he could find himself in jail, kicked out of school or fired from a job. Therefore, he has a vested interested in solving the issue. He needs to work with the adults in his life to find a solution so that he doesn't forget. With my son I found that quiet signals like touching him on the shoulder were effective ways to let him know he was doing something he should not be doing. Most of time these issues were reflexive actions he didn't fully realize he was engaged in. We didn't need to make an issue of it; we just needed to make him think about what he was doing. That may easily be the case for your step son; that he barely realizes he is doing it. He won't become aware and attentive to the prevention of it unless he is given a consistent reminder.

I'm in complete agreement with the others. What he's doing is normal and fine but he needs to get the hang of not doing anything in that nature in public before he gets into serious trouble. I'm not sure your husband and his mother are seeing it from that perspective.

Maybe you can encourage him to do it in private. It is unfortunate his biological parents aren't doing that...I mean he could get in trouble his age if doing that kind of thing.

Its normal to want to touch himself but he needs to do it in private, maybe you could at least get his dad on board with helping to remind him. I mean tell him your concerned your step son could get in trouble if its not addressed. I mean he is 15 so he needs to know it can get him in trouble...but at the same time that its not wrong for him to do it, just that it needs to be in private.