School Lunch and the 504/IEP

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Last year, most of my son's meltdowns were caused by stressors during lunch and recess. His teachers were aware of his needs well before he got the 504 we're currently working with, but they don't eat lunch with the kids.

The lunchrooms are run by part-time staff workers who I doubt get paid more than minimum wage. Many of them don't speak English (this shouldn't be an issue, it's a bilingual program, but it means they can't monitor the English-speaking kids' conversations.) The same goes for the recess monitors. Of course, the social aspects of lunch and recess make this the most absolutely stressful time of the school day for my son, and I can't figure out how to address it.

Does anyone have a school situation where their 504 or IEP extend to lunch and recess? What did you write in it to make sure that your child is protected during those times?

For example: at lunch, my son decided he was going to stand up to a boy he perceived was bullying another boy (he probably overstated the situation, but he really was trying to do what was right) The boy responded by turning on my son, and eventually daring him to strangle him...which, of course, my son tried to do (sometimes he's like Ella Enchanted) Apparently nobody heard the conversation leading up to the strangling incident and if they did, they didn't intervene; the other boy was stopped by a staff person who found him dialing 911 from his cell phone.

Another time, after we had written into the 504 that other children who were "parenting" my son were supposed to be directed to allow the adult to handle him - he'd joined a group of friends who were sitting on another boy "because it was funny." He couldn't respond quickly enough to the recess staff person's direction to get off, and wound up being yelled at by the entire third grade - I got a call from his teacher who said he was afraid to go back to class (and I can't blame him.)

There were no trained social workers or teachers present in either situation, and I'm doubting that the schools are going to offer one. Any suggestions?

Yes. I was told I didn't have to go to lunch, so instead I was given permission to go to the library or resource room. I do not know how applicable this can be to your child because he seems to be in a younger grade, but it does happen.

Elementary school lunches weren't very chaotic to me, but I did spend my recess days indoors any opportunity I was given.