My son told me a while back that when he is trying to memorize stuff he see pictures in his head rather than letters or words (I see letters and words).
Today was the first day of school. He had a good day. I did special things for him to make sure he had a good day. But when we got home, he felt overwhelmed. He became mean, crabby, overstimulated. It is me, him (he is 10), his brother who is 18 months old, and our pets. Our house is very loud, especially when we all get home from a long day - both the kids are starving and my 18 month old talks, yells, crys, laughs, plays loudly, non-stop when we get home. It is overwhelming even for me.
My son was freaking out a bit. I kept telling him to go in his room for some quiet time because he was being mean. He said no, he just wants it quiet. His irritation kept escalating. I offered him different solutions, which all included different rooms where he could go and get away from us. He kept saying no. He is extremely inflexible. I tried explaining his brother has not yet developed self control and is unable to sit quietly, to be patient with him, etc...
I have made these suggestions to him at other times, when he is not irritated, thinking he might understand it more clearly.
My dad had been over for the evening and saw my son's extreme irritation. Later in the evening, my dad brought up to me how I told him that my son told me he thinks/memorizes in pictures. He said maybe I need to literally show him to go to another room when he is irritated rather than just speak to him with words. Draw him a picture. Wow, great idea.
After my dad left, I told my son to follow me. We went to the back door, where we come in after work/school. We walked to the table where he is to put his school bag. We walked to the fridge and pretended to get a drink. We walked to the pantry and pretended to get a snack. We walked to his DSi and picked it up. We walked to his room, closed the door, sat on the bed and took a deep breath. All the while I was talking, explaining it to him as I showed (pretended) each step from beginning to end.
He seemed relieved and happy after showing him. He understood and agreed to do that tomorrow to prevent his irritation. I asked him if he understood it better after I physically showed him what to do. He said yes. I asked what the difference is between me showing him and me telling him, he said he doesn't know, it is just better.
We will see if he actually does it and benefits from it tomorrow after school. If he does it, I think I am on to something.
For some reason my son does not seem to do well with actual pictures such as labels or picture instructions. But I think this may work.
Any thoughts, suggestions, similar kids?
I must say this is the first functional piece of advice I have received in the past year that I had never tried before, and definately the first piece of advice that I have ever received that functionally worked. Wow, this is a good feeling.
18 Aug 2010, 10:02 pm
