Does the right school placement help with the meltdowns?

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My 10 Y/O DS violently melts down when overwhelmed. It happens for both sensory and emotional meltdowns. He is currently in an emotionally disturbed classroom, which is a real bummer because the kids there have really different issues than DS (ODD, CD & Mental retardation, DS is smart and nice, he is fine behaviorally until he melts down). However, this placement can deal with restraining him if he melts down.

The schools that seem like they would be right for DS academically & socially, don't necessarily want the emotionaly disturbed label.

I am curious if the right placement makes some of the other stuff go away. I think the wrong placement makes it worse, will the right placement make it better?

Why are people with MR in an emotionally disturbed room? I had an emotionally disturbed label in school, simply because they said it was easier than putting me under autism on the IEP and they're lazy. But I was still given services related to autism.

I think putting an AS child around people with ODD is a recipe for disaster.

The kid that is MR, is high functioning and flips out, so they need him to be in the small environment that can handle these issues. I am VERY concerned about my child's only social exposure being kids with ODD & CD. The environment is so controlled that the kids haven't been mean to my son. In fact, because he's so smart, funny & has such a wealth of experiences, they totally look up to him. He's not getting much out of it though, and when they all get older the ODD and CD will be problimatic for hime to be around.

If I had any sense that if we placed him properly, the violence would stop... It seems that way to me, but I would hate to be wrong.

Has a functional behavioral assessment (FBA) been done to determine what is causing the behavior? Is there a positive behavioral intervention plan (BIP) in place to address his behaviors? The assessment and the plan need to be done by a certified behavior analyst, not by the classroom teacher. If these are not being done, your son is not getting the services he needs. If you are in the USA, these should be discussed at every IEP meeting. You should request an FBA in writing, to be performed by a certified behavior analyst, immediately.

Yup, he has a BIP. However, I don't think they actually figured anything out. Over time, I have been journaling every meltdown, and I am starting to see the patterns, sensory, anxiety (especially social) change. I don't think an ED environment is going to teach the coping skills that are lacking. I think they just give points for good behavior. Well, when my kid isn't melting down, he gets perfect points, all the time. It is when he is overwhelmed, he just can't seem to draw on those skills. He needs a program that will teach that.

Is there any way that you could homeschool him? So far my son is only 5, so we haven't started homeschooling yet, but I am really opening my mind to the possibility of it. My son seems high functioning at times, but he likes to make loud noises in class. I am afraid that they are going to keep wanting to put him in special ed classes because of this. I understand that if he is making loud noises in a general ed class, that would be too disruptive for the other kids. But at the same time, I don't think it is going to help him any to keep being placed in special ed.

Most homeschooling programs have groups that get together for social activities.

Here in Georgia, they also have an option for special need kids to do school on line (at home of course)

Good luck with finding the right place for your son.

Hi Angelbear -

I work full time and am the provider of all of our medical benefits. My DH travels for a living and can be gone for months at a time. (for instance he has been home 10 days since June 12). Further, I dont see DS really working for me. Once he's old enough to be home alone (ever????) then I can possibly pull him out, but now, we just can't.

I believe there are good programs out there. I am in the SF bay area and there are a couple of great AS schools. However, don't think they'll deal with the violence. We have to gae a handle on it. He's such a love when he's not melting down!

Have you had a chance to look at the book available at http://www.asdstuff.com? I have been recommending it an awful lot lately, and I don't know if you have taken the chance to look at it. Half of the book talks about meltdowns, the cause, and how to deal with them. It isn't going to solve all your problems just by reading it, but it may give you a lot of useful information. The book is free, so it doesn't cost anything to take a look and see if it is helpful.

Is his BIP truly his BIP, or is it a general program in place for everyone in the school/program? A BIP shouldn't just be giving points for good behavior; it should be something that supports good behavior and has a plan for redirecting your son's specific problem areas (when appropriate) or ignoring (when appropriate), and all the adults at school are supposed to follow the same plan so that his inappropriate behavior elicits the same response from all the adults at school all the time. It has to be based on an FBA that is the result of hours of observation by a trained specialist, in a variety of settings at school, and conversations with different teachers and sometimes even the child. They look at what triggers the behavior, the behavior, and the consequences of the behavior, and then develop a plan - it's not supposed to be a "canned" program that's the same for everyone. The positive supports also have to be positives for your son - not every child will respond to points, especially if the points can't be "traded in" for anything the child values.

Since you are in the SF Bay Area, I am going to suggest you look at Star Academy in San Rafael. People love that school. Very individualized. Small. Never make assumptions about what a school will or will not be willing to handle; ASK them. Set up a meeting, bring the files, see what they say.

I do believe the violence would decrease in the right environment, and kuddos to you for keeping a detailed journal on the stress factors. Still, we're talking reduce, not eliminate, because it is probably impossible to get rid of all levels and all types of stress. But, get the stress factors down to a reasonable level, and you have some hope of the child developing his own coping skills. Keep the stress factors at too high a level, and he doesn't have the luxury of figuring things out; his life is too reactive.

We've seen some kids go practically night to day when the right change in environment or situation is made.

I think our kids deserve to thrive in school. While it may not always be possible, you work on the assumption it is, and make changes until you can honestly say, "I've done the best I can."

Wow - I wonder what happened? I wrote a detailed reply earlier and it isn't here......

OK, I think this is kind of what I said...

Tracker, yes, I have downloaded and read about 1/2 of the book. Thank you it is helpful! What a wonderful thing you are doing.

Jat - Yes, DS has had a FAA and a behaviorist developed a BIP from it. However, I do not think they discovered the anticedants, or really figured anything out. I believe that a box has been checked that they have provided this support. I do not really think that they have identified what causes the meltdowns, and how to help him develop the skills early enough in the process, to actually avoid the meltdown.

DW a mom-

The neuropsychologist called Star Academy for me and told me that they won't take him as they didn't think he would be a fit for thier program. the violence really is a concern. However, are we in a vicious cycle, if the poor placement is causing the meltdowns that keep him in the poor placement? UGH!! ! I shouldn't have had the neuropsych make calls for me though, as I don't think that we see eye to eye on the nature of DS' problems. She has dx'd him as BP and thinks that he's not on the spectrum and the violence is caused by BP.

I don't care what the name of his issue is, but I believe meltdowns are triggered when he has multiple stressors. Typically he will have more than one of these stressors before he melts: sensory, change, social anxiety & frustration. He has tested with severe executive dysfunction, so class for non LD students is really frustrating. I feel like if I can get him in a school that is developed to manage the Exec function LD, social anxiety and sensory issues - I think that he will have the best chance possible.

Star Academy would be a 40 minute commute for us AND I work full time, so not sure how that would happen, but it sure does look like an outstanding program!

Ugh, I don't have any new answers for you, then, either.

I think you should attend some open house days at the various schools you've considered and bring your son with you. Don't let him think that you are going to be moving him to the school you are looking at, because odds sound like they might be stacked against it, but ask him to observe what he likes, what he doesn't like, and why, etc in the "hopes of tailoring his education better." Of course, the flip side will be that the schools now get a first hand look at your child, as well, and maybe they'll change their minds about if he is a good fit or not.

It does get really difficult when you have multiple different issues going on at the same time with one child. Cause and effect can be really unclear, and the layers difficult to sort.

Just ... keep trying. There has to be something better for him.