Teachers grrrrrr

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Our son just started preschool. Today is his second day. The first day I stayed with him today I went and dropped him off then left for a couple of hours. When I cam back I asked one of the teachers how he did. Her response was he was good a couple of minor things bit they dealt with it. What pissed me off was she than said "how great it was that he didn't get upset when I left. That she realizes it is mostly due to what is "wrong" with him but it was good that he didnt". It took everything in my body not to go on a tirade. There is nothing "wrong" with our son.

Well, at least she is trying. In preschool I got dirty looks and eventually a demand that I go into family counseling because there must be something wrong with all of us, since my child was not like any they had ever known (thankfully the counselor absolved us and blamed the school; she didn't get onto the AS, either, but at least she knew there was nothing "wrong"). Sigh.

You will find some teachers who "get" it, and many more who don't. It seems to all still be a learning process for them. I recently went to a high school open house where the academic support department dutifully had all the paperwork printed with the term, "learning differences," but the assistant teacher kept forgetting and saying, "learning disabilities."

It is really hard when year after year you have teachers so focused on your child's issues that they forget to fall in love with him. We were so blessed in elementary school, because my son's teachers, most of them, adored him. I really felt that absence when we got to middle school, and it seemed like the teachers were struggling to just figure out which face he was. Then, this year, we got a new speech specialist and the first thing she said was, "I have to tell you, I adore your son!" Oh, that felt so good. Those were words I felt like I'd been starved for. I want people to see in him what I see, and I know that, ultimately, is what you want most, too. Hopefully, this teacher eventually will.

I am not sure why she thought that just because your son didn't get upset that this is because of autism. Many children with ASD have extreme separation anxiety and throw major fits when they are dropped off at school.

Thankfully, we too have been blessed with teachers who are very good with my son and they get it. But there are others who just don't.

No they dont get it but hopefully with more interactions with our son they will. Part of the problem is there are 2 other boys on the spectrum in his class. The other boys have classic autism and require quite a bit of care. This was their first interaction with children on the spectrum. Our son has very different abilities than the other boys yet they dont seem to differentiate. Exactly why the new DSM V perhaps doing away with the PDD-NOS and AS diagnosis is so concerning. We will get there. The good thing is he does seem to enjoy being at school.