Behavior Incentive Plan

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We are getting ready to do an incentive program with my 7 year old son. I was curious if any of you have any good resources and or pros or cons you might have learned if you have tried it with your child! Thanks!

For my son it works GREAT!! ! It helps him to actually "see" an incentive, rather than trying to come up with it himself. One time I had a hitting problem (still do but not as bad) and he wanted a DS. I took him to the store with a camera, took a picture of the DS and 3 games. I made little cards for him to earn, earning a game for 5 days of no hitting (I used a lot of prompting and reminders and allowed for one mess up a day) and after 20 days he earned 3 games and a DS. When we were done he gave me his tickets and we got the DS. It worked so well. I do little incentives with him all the time, and they do them at school too. Some behavior he still can't control so I don't make them unattainable, but he feels good about himself when he earns things for good behavior, and it helps to develop habits.

Once he's learned a behavior and I know he can control it, when he does something inappropriate that warrents punishment (usually losing tv time or something he really loves) I give him opportunities to "earn" some of that time back. Not all of it, because he still needs a consequence, but some of it. That takes some of the conflict that goes with applying consequences, and a way to redeem himself.

I didn't use any resources other than PECS pictures to do the charts if I didn't use actual photo's, but as long as you have something that he can see, that can show progress, that he has a hand in creating so he can own it that's all I think you really need. Good Luck! Some kids don't work well with this type of behavior strategy, but for my son it's works great!

One thing I've learned with my son: he can turn any reward system into a punitive system if you aren't careful; so "earning" something becomes "losing" it.

A couple of ways around this: we make sure whatever he's working towards is attainable, or broken down into very small components with a reward for each part of the task. We don't make the reward anything too exciting (so it's not a big deal if he loses it.) We don't remind him of the reward, we just present it when it's earned.

DS has internalized this system enough that he has started coming up with his own rewards: our morning routine centers around the snooze alarm. He figured out that if he can get dressed lightning-quick, he can crawl back in bed with us for a minute or two...so now getting dressed takes him thirty seconds instead of ten minutes.

I give my son 15 minutes of tv time in the morning. If he gets what he needs to get done before it's time to leave he can finish what he's watching or watch a little more. Same thing as crawling back in bed. Works great!

The DS was big thing for my son that he wanted, and I did make attainable, but I thought I'd kill 2 birds with one stone by doing that. I didn't want to just hand it to him. He only messed up 4 days, and like I said, I gave him a lot of support during the process, but momsparky brings up a very good point. You have to be careful it doesn't turn into something punitive. At my son's school they have a Random Act of Kindness chart, and when they do something kind they get a sticker. At the end of the month they give out a gift certificate for whoever gets the most. (if a person wins a lot they try to spread it around) My son for a few months in a row lost by one sticker, and I was concerned that he would stop trying because he keeps trying and losing so what's the point. They started something else to go with that so he does get rewarded with tokens where he can buy something at the end of the week out of a little "store" with dollar store toy trinkets, which was a separate chart for things like raising your hand without blurting out the answer, and things like that. That has gone very well. At the end of the day he is scored, they talk about what his successes were and give him his "money". That teaches him to save and work for things, and the value of working toward something, and rewards him at the same time.

My dauther is 6 and is just starting on a rewards system and it works very well so far. Her Kindergarten teacher ordered live lady bug eggs and she gets to spend some time for each goal she meets. It could be watching them, reading to them, drawing pictures of them...etc. She LOVES bugs so this has improved her school performance a lot. We are still working with her ABA provided on the home-based version. I'm using a temporary system using a dry erase board and her choice of rewards. TV, computer games, outdoor play...whatever is reasonable. And it works well for her NT syster who is 4. In my personal experience, yes...it works.

What plan are you putting into place?

I'm starting a new plan for my 9yo aspie and 11yo NT. It's call Positive Parenting with a Plan but I'm severely tweaking it. I need it for structure for all of us. My son thrives with structure and I'm not naturally structured so this will help us all. This plan is designed for training kids to follow rules but I'm using it for only 3-4 targets/goals at a time for each person. I'm excited to try it b/c we've really struggled to carry forward our routines.

My aspie likes the game-like feel to the plan. When the kids miss their target, they have to draw a "Good Habit" card. These cards include grace cards, wild cards (where I pick the consequence), positive cards (like do something nice for the little girls next door or write to an aunt), as well as some negative ones (clean one window). They get a token or checkmark for each day they met targets w/o having to draw a Good Habit card. These translate to rewards.

Let us know how it's going.

Our Eldest's teacher uses a system that he's responded really well to: The kids start out with a Smiley face, and each time they have a problem over the course of the day the face gets downgraded -- from Smiley to "Not So Good" to Sad. They've got the opportunity to get a step back up the chart for being particularly good, like turning Not So Good back to Smiley. They've goa page that gets sent home with a face for each day of the month, for the parents to initial and the child to bring back to schol the next day.

He tells his mom what kind of day he had right off, and the teacher has a list of numbers at the bottom of the page so that she can note what the day's problems were -- "Not finishing work", "Using bad language," "Being disrespectful", and so forth.

(My son, god help me, is the one who got in trouble for correcting how another child pronounced a particular expletive. I blame his mother for enhancing his vocabulary in such a fashion.)

Now, admittedly, Eldest has learned to game the system: He didn't want to do some work one day, and so told the teacher that he'd give himself a Not So Good day so that he didn't have to do it. We've explained that this isn't how things work, and he's accepted that. We do offer simple rewards for a Smiley day, like stopping on the way home to get a bag of chips, and a bigger one for a full week of Smiles -- like Water Ice.

It's worth noting that the Youngest, who just started preschool, makes a point of announcing that HE got a smiley face when I get home each night. Has to be included, that one.

This is one of the core tools in ABA. I'm concerned for my daughters self esteem under this process. Yes, she can work towards a reward but is that teaching her the behavior or just teaching her how to get the reward? If she behaves incorrectly - aka: autistically - she receives no reward. No punishment, but no reward either. She is more than smart enough to work out this system.

'How I am is bad... I need to change and be different to be good."

What does this remind you of? This is also how you train dogs. Personally, I am not concerned with my dog's self esteem. I am concern for my child's. Within the second week of ABA behavior modification my daughter came home crying because she didn't want to be different from other people. Teaching her a behavior without the understanding of why the behavior makes sense and works for other people is, in essence, teaching her nothing at all other than how to dislike herself and continually point out how often and how badly she makes mistakes. No matter how 'nicely' the concept is applied, I find it destructive.

I also love to see my daughter grow and thrive and learn new skills but I won't do so at the expense of her self esteem.

I didnt read all the responses so hopefully I'm not just repeating whats already been said.. LOL

These types of deals do NOT work for my daughter. They actually stress her out as she is a perfectionist and feels pressured as well feeling that her actions are being judged as good enough or not. She also takes it very hard when she makes a mistake. I have found that consequences and rewards do not make a difference in our house. She tries to follow all the rules and do what is expected so when she doesnt its bc she cant not because there is a lack of effort or motivation.

What does work is putting what we want done in the context of rules and routines as that is where she excels. But each child is different so you have to just think about your child. Does your child need motivation to do something they do not want to do? Than this may help.