He is on the spectrum!

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Hi all,

As some of you may know I have two boys, C 21 and J 12. I mostly talk about J who was diagnosed a few years back with aspergers. Well since J's dx I've wondered if this isn't what was going on with my oldest as well. Unfortunately C had aged out of all the services I could afford to have him assessed threw the public health system.

Things all came to a head though over the last 18months because C has been struggling even more being out of school and with all the adult expectations that go with his age.
We have scrimped and saved over the last few months and finally had C privately assessed. I spoke with C's psychologist yesterday and he is saying "Yes he has autism". When I asked if C had aspergers like J, he said he could tick all those asperger box's but I got the feeling it's going to come back as autism. The doc will spend Friday (today) and this weekend writing up his report. He wants to make it as in depth as he can so that there is no misunderstandings and so that C never has to go threw one of those assessment again and he wants it written to allow C the best possible opportunities with other services.

The relief of finally knowing and putting a name to whats being going on all his life is over whelming, I feel like someone just threw us a life jacket. At the same time though I can now feel anger creeping in. Anger at all the educational professionals that dismissed my pleas for help and evaluations when C was in school. Guilt is also a small lingering feeling, why didn't I know it was autism? Could I have done anything more? I took him every where I could and I screamed and pleaded with anyone that would give me 5 minutes of their time. I begged for answers, but I guess without knowing what direction to push anyone in no one understood what I was trying to tell them. My super good kid has major issues, every one looked at me like I was an idiot. Why complain about a kid that does everything you ask? because it's not neurotypical and just because he does every thing I ask doesn't mean he understands or is even happy. I had that exact discussion with a doc when my son was 17.
Any way I just needed to off load. I guess I could change my signature thingy now.

I totally understand. It must be really freeing to know that at least you don't have to shake people anymore to convince them that your son really does have an ASD. My son has Dx, but my daughter, who has many more sxs at home, flys under the radar at school. It's scary.

I am glad you will finally be able to get your son the support he needs. I totally understand all the mixed emotions. Just remember YOU did all you could.