Friends

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My son can make friends, but not as a group, it has to be him and the other friend, if any one else even his cousin tries to join he gets very upset. He gets on very well with his cousin, we live close together. sometimes this can be rivarily but most of the time it just my son.

If his cousin comes when his friend is there he gets very upset, Now that I understand this I try to avoid it but at times its unavoidable. If his cousin has friends my son wont visit him and seems upset about this. He feels if his cousin visit when his friend is around that he is taking his friends away. Now I do ask him if he would like his cousin to call when he has a friend around, sometimes he is open to this other times not. But if he is open to it and something goes wrong it seems to be my fault. regardless I can work this out, but how does one manage this my son thinks that if a friend visit he should not engage with anyone other them him.

This could be bc of a few things one being that he is right. I know as a child kids would play with me if I was the only option but often if more than one child were there I just became the least popular in the group. Children would be less tolerant of me bc they now had options. LOL

Also, it may be that he finds the social time stressful and dealing with more than one child makes it harder.

I would try inviting 2 other kids over that he is not quite so possessive over and see if he can maneuver that for a little more confidence in a group. I know my girl does better one on one too. I think for her the extra opinions, etc are just stressful.

If he goes for a sleep over which I am really happy about, but when he finds another child which is also his friend there, its very stressful for him. He seems to manage one to one no prob. The other child could be a very good friend but he just can't seem to manage it at the same time. Why?

when he was younger and its still the same, he was always invited to play, go to parties, sleep overs (sleep over's which I stopped discreetly before I ever heard about AS) he used to get so stressed out I didnt know why but I didnt like how it effected him. Most of the time I really try to accommodate his needs which can be very difficult. He is a very good athlete, admired, others want to be his friend, he just doesnt see this. Which is ok, but he feels no one likes him and then he upset? Is this just AS and that's how it is?