Is childcare good or bad for spectrum babies/ children?

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Experience? Thoughts? Opinions?

corporate child care is a big no no.

Send me a pm and I'll tell you alllll about it. It's awful.

Even if in front of your face they turn around and act like Mary Poppins.

Kids need parents not disinterested employees regardless of any "special needs". Daycare hurts kids.

Why limit it to a PM? Enlighten us!

depends. if you have to work for a living, you don't have much choice other than putting your child in a childcare situation.

we used everything from babysitters to a small day-home to a large center. the first worked well, and two of the three large centers we used were wonderful. one was a total pit, but the only one open during the evenings when we needed the care.

depends on the kid, depends on the caregivers(s), depends on the situation.

I'm not a parent, but when I was little (as young as eight weeks), I was almost always in day care. This lasted through age ten. I didn't have a problem with the bigger ones one bit, but the ones that were run at the house were typically pretty bad.

Yes and No,
for a child on the spectrum the socializations with other children are beneficial,
so a lot of it depends on the day care and its provider.

When my daughter (AS) was 2 1/2, we made the decision to put her in part-time daycare so she could have some social interaction with peers. We realized she had some social issues and thought that being around other children would be helpful for her. It was, and she even potty trained within weeks of beginning at the center because she loved it so much. I think it really depends on (a) the provider, (b) the child, (c) the length of time spent in childcare. For us, it was a positive experience and it prepared her for preschool. She went for the summer, for four months. She now loves preschool and I think it gave her the social confidence she needed to do well.

I loved preschool. I spent about half the time talking with Brandon about how we both wanted to be paleontologists. (we both knew that word), when we went to the playroom I played with brandon and two kids whose name I don't remember, usually in the rocking boat.

I can remember my 4th birthday being celebrated pretty vividly where I picked that we would do hula-hoops, I remember playing "farmer and the dell" and I loved playtime.

My only negative memory of preschool happened when my mom forced to me to dress as the easter bunny on a day we weren't supposed to dress up. I spent all of playtime sitting on the piano bench and retorting "they're in your bags" when the other kids came up and said "hey easter bunny where's my eggs." I was an adult before I was comfortable wearing a halloween costume that didn't mask my face and I believe this embarassing incident is why.

My son has been in daycare for the last year and he's benefited from it quite a bit. The daycare is very adaptive toward his needs though. They have a very small class size of about 6 other kids, it's all very structured and they always tell him what's going on, and they try to give him lots of different sensory input during the day as well as provide him with a cool-down room if it gets too hard for him.

He's really getting good at social interactions with peers now, even though it's mostly just him bossing around the other kids "Don't run, you'll fall and hurt yourself", it's a lot more than what he used to do.

one comment, from having observed kindergarteners. nt or not, you can see a difference in kids who have been in a formal daycare setting and kids who have been raised only at home. the kids from daycare tend (in a very broad sense) to get along a bit better, understand about taking turns and forming lines a bit more, are used to the routine a bit more. stay at home kids are more used to being the center of attention, with all the baggage that brings to a classroom.

from my observations only.

Okay.

One corporate daycare setting and I emphasize this was corporate controlled because this is the only one I had experienced.

Told them my child had texture issues with food and did not eat meat. They said okay well strict food policy. What does that mean? You aren't allowed to bring your child food they will eat. They feed the child what is on the menu only. My child would not eat their food at all. The ladies got to see this and knew I was not making it up.

I came in one day to see my kiddo the only child left sitting at the table crying. Not touching her food. The teacher had to make time to clean. All the other kids had already eaten their meals and were playing. Went into console her.

Never adjusted to nap time. She cried the whole time.

Got sick the whole time she was there. She was usually healthy at home and not sick. After pulling her out, she is now back to being active and happy.

They weren't adaptive at all. Anything I tried to suggest they would say strict policies. I had to stick with that place for a month and on top of it, they ended up ripping me of.

Not saying daycare won't work for you but some corporate daycares will not adapt to your own child's needs. I am not going to put the name of the daycare here out of respect but let me tell you, I actually regret signing my name on the dotted line after the way I was treated. My child in my case is actually better off in my care.

Also to Nan, sorry but there are all of these "you can tell who is a daycare vs. stay at home kid by (insert negative connotation)."

What an insultive joke.

People always make something into a game and war. Home vs. daycare. It's an insult to those who are not apart of that stereotype nor is their child.

Like omg, the child doesn't form the line correctly ruining my convenience. Not all daycare kids are pleasant either and not all children that are not apart of the daycare system just sit at home all day.

Hence why you see biters, bloody noses etc..

If a child is having a problem with forming a line, you may be inconvenienced but you're a teacher right?

I remember when I was a kid, I'd get really annoyed with lines and step out and guess what? I was a daycare kid!

what you say may be true,
but as well is true,
that children do not learn and adapt to sociaty and others in their lives if they are not exposed too it.
and not all daycares and daycare providers are alike,
the daycare my child goes to the provider is more then willing to work with the child and parent and their special needs.
and they keep an eye on all the children, my provider is one of those that has made her own home into the daycare and she has helpers as well that are aware and kind.
there are pros and cons to every setting.

As it stands right now, I can't do the daycare settings anyway. You live and learn.

There are probably some really great daycares out there. Just have to investigate. Basically learn from my mistake. If you do find yourself thinking of a corporate setting for a child with special needs. A great website to investigate further is

www.ripoffreport.com

That place has the daycare my child attended all over the place. I should have went to that website first but I also let someone talk me into thinking the place was just great to begin with but it wasn't so great.

Things to keep in mind.

Does your child have texture issues with food? Bring this up during the tour. Ask about food policies. I did that with another daycare I was investigating trying to find a better daycare than the corporate one which was supposed to be a good setting. They kinda dodged the truth by saying well....we usually won't bend to the rules because we don't want all the other kids to think they can have special treatment too.

If a daycare says it in that way during a tour it's because they want you to sign and want to give you the impression that maybe it can be arranged but it most likely won't.

A good response from a daycare is expressing an understanding and not treating your child as though they would be deviating from the norm and causing havoc for all the other kids. They will want to work with your child.

My child did eat the snacks there but not the other food. At home if my child will not eat one dish, I give her something else. At home at least I know she's getting fed.

If on the tour they encourage you show up unnannounced but you actually do and they are rude about it and blame you for something going wrong, that is a red flag. You must give two weeks notice before taking your child out. This means even if your child is not there the whole week because you are not impressed, you still must pay.

Nap time. Does your child take naps? If so, it should be okay but if not, your child may be laying on the cot crying the whole nap time. Tell the daycare about how your child responds to nap time.

Sensory issues like sounds. You may want to invest in ear muffs.

Also if you end up in the wrong daycare where people don't understand about autism, they might call you up and tell you that your child is troubled and not allowed to come back.

Also, high turnover rate. Bad daycares can have some really nice teachers. The teachers that are hired for the daycare my child attended did not have much testing. I learned this from the teacher. They hire anyone. The teachers weren't the problem though. It was the policy and the higher ups like supervisors and directors. If you see alot of complaints from ex-teachers, chances are they aren't making it up.

The nicer teachers will end up leaving and getting tired of the supervisor telling them to be a little meaner. For example, a teacher for the room with infants was politely trying to wake up the infant by speaking softly and rubbing the infant's back. A supervisor came in and scolded her telling her she wasn't doing it correctly. The supervisor yanked the child's blanket off.

This was from a teacher I knew who stopped working at another center. She got tired of the mean bossy supervisors constantly breathing down her neck for not being mean enough.

These places charge 250 a week too! Yet they pay the teachers minimum wage and penny pinch when it comes to supplies and alternate children between classrooms just to make room for other kids behind parents backs.

So you never know if the teacher is feeling overwhelmed by having to potty train, feed, punish an abusive kid, wipe runny noses, teach, write down everything on sheets, change diapers, recess, make sure kids are napping, listen to the scoldy mean supervisor etc... all of that for minimum wage just so corporate daycare can pinch pennies and make you think you are getting quality service because of how much you pay.

Then they will proceed to rip you off more if you aren't happy. You try to talk to corporate about it and they make you feel like it's all your fault when it was one of their higher up employees who was ripping you off and it just shows you where their priorities are.

Do not trust settings like this.

It sounds like you ran across some fairly rotten daycares.

sorry to hear that, children always needs whats best for them.

My son has texture issues as well, not as bad as they used to be though,
I work with him on them, he is almost 2.5 years old.
He is having no problems eating meats at my home, but he does have issues,
but his mother for the life of her cant seem to get him to eat most of her meats (hehe)
as well as other foods like citrus, but I have found ways around those issues and then work him into them.
just she dont talk to me and refuses my assistance thinking she is better insted of whats best for our child.
(shrugs)

The daycare lady basically tries a variety of things and then feeds him what works and then gets enough for all the children and their needs as well, she as well will let us bring him his own snacks and things.

Wow. Your daycare lady sounds awesome!

Maybe that place I was talking about could learn from her and you.

Yeah, I work with my girl. She's getting better with food. She's showing progress with expressing wants and coping skills for sounds although sounds is something that is something very difficult to control especially as a child. I understand this.

When she does new things, it warms my heart

I'm taking the acceptance and positive learning approach.

Sometimes just got to let it sink in and it will click after repetition of course or what is it called "Practice makes perfect?" Isn't that repetative?

Repetition makes perfect!