OK people I'm confused! Advice needed please.....

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Sorry don't know if I posted about my son not wanting to go to OT anymore.....

Here's the thing. I took him to good OT for SI and cognitive training for anxiety management.

I picked up last week that she is not meeting him on his emotional level: For eg: She asked him how his day was, he said bad because his friends are being mean to him. She responded with: Agh, don't worry, get other friends! Hallo! He can't just make other friends, this is part of his problem.


They do the same things over and over again...he needs to plan the activities and then do it....part of teaching him organizing and thinking of new ideas to do things.....On a SI level....great! On a ASD level....less great!
So I encouraged him to tell her when things is boring to him, so mommy don't do all the talking. He kept on telling her yesterday things are boring...Her responce: This is your fult, because you choose the activities, you must plan new ones....ok so there went the trust.
Little things upset him like he asked her why he needs to wash his hands with dishwashing liquid, she said all soap is the same....ect.

When we got home he was emotionally "all over the place"....don't know if you know the feeling...being oppositional, irritated, anoying, moody....the way he gets when he is upset. He says she irritates him....

I feel that she missed some points....she is excellent with SI, but not good with psychiatry....It's like my son needs an OT that can treat both....IMO she assumed he was higher functioning than what he actually is and expected to much, to quick.....this often happens with my son because he is bright and clever.

Must I just stop the OT....try and do some of the things myself....being an OT....having some of the stuff at home....or will this give him the message that if you dont like something you can just give up?

I actually think this is causing more damage than good....

Can you meet with her and bring up these concerns? This is all such an evolving area for these professionals, they often really appreciate the feedback.

If that doesn't improve things, trust your instincts. Don't continue if you don't think it is positive.

Wow, she seems on the wrong track! A red flag for me! If a child is feeling upset or frustrated, it is important to empathize and make them feel valid. It makes me sad that he has to deal with that.

So essentially he is *trying* to communicate his needs to her and she is minimizing/not listening to them.

This happens frequently to children.

For situations like the dish soap, I think I would tell her he has a need to know why things are done a certain way. Instead of saying all soap is the same (it might not be to him, especially if he has sensory issues) she could have said "Because we only have dish soap here right now. Do you prefer the other kind of soap?"

Two things to consider......

The first, I realize has been brought up before is, how would you want it handled if you were the OT in this situation? I would try to address this from a professional standpoint first.

Second, as consumers it's totally fine to look for the product you want and need. There is no need to see this as quitting of the first OT you work with isn't a right fit. I think teaching your child to be assertive to get his needs met, and if the solution isn't easy, to find alternate ways to meet the same goal is a great lesson. This is not the same as saying, oh we tried OT, we didn't like the therapist so we quit OT. Just quit the therapist, I would vote for looking for another first and then doing your own thing if that doesn't work.

Good luck!

She might be a great OT, but sometimes when it comes to people, its just not a good fit.

The people thing is the hardest part of OT. Maybe you should try to find a better fit for your son.

I tried doing OT with my older son, and I tried having a nanny do it. It did not work out. We could figure out what he needed to work on but lacked the right touch and right amount of creativity in this arena. (I am more of a speech and reading person).

However, my ABA therapist and a professional OT who was very sensitive and creative were able to get the job done.

Thanx for yor feedback.....its very supporting.