anyone dealing with these regular issues? long..

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Hi! My son will be 8 next month and here are some our regular issues that I'd like to hear some tips or thoughts on even if its just that you can relate!

-Blake hates to brush his teeth! It's like torture!
-He doesnt like sudden noises and is usually intimidated by loud noises but doesn't go into meltdown over it.
-Blake doesn't sleep well even with an anti-hyperintensive med.
-He finds it difficult to get dressed independently, I usually have to help him, he freaks about getting his shoes on because he often gets frustrated getting them on and tieing them.
-He has some issues with clothes- he refuses to wear jeans, doesn't like to change outfits each day, has to wear socks to bed, recently must have long underwear on, won't change socks it stinks!, freaks when seasons change because shorts to pants or vice versa is traumatizing.
-Without his med he cannot make it to the bathroom, he soils his pants everytime, I think he can't tell when he has to go until he is going.
-He has food issues, but its not texture its that he eats everything, nonstop, spicy or not and he is never full. I think he cant tell when he is full. He often steals and hoards food as if I starve him.
-He has trouble academically. He doesn't have a super ability in math or electronics like I've read. He barely can read and is under grade level in all subjects. His iq is average and I think we haven't figured out the right way to teach him yet. plus he needs one on one.
-And a big one....he is completely different at home than at school or anywhere. It's like he acts like he is 'supposed to' at school or somewhere and when he comes home he is exhausted from that and has to let it all out with tantrums, irritability, poor thing.
-Socially he is ok for now. Doing better saying hello and goodbye, looking at people and learning names. He plays with kids and likes to be around them, but he needs time after to decompress and play alone, also he doesn't initiate play or socializing and he seems to sometime be awkward or seems to be figuring out how to act instead of being himself. He tries to mock other kids and sometimes that isn't good.

On the other hand he is actually creative and likes to draw. He plays alone and imaginative. He dresses up in costumes and acts out every thing he sees on tv. He will watch a movie while he is acting it out. His gross motor skills are good and he is athletic though he decided he didn't want to play baseball this spring. But he wants to play football. He loves being active.
He notices details I usually never would, like things you can see or hear, its cool.
He loves his toy cars and anything army, police, fireman, or knights!

Whew! Sorry that was so long! Anyone know any tricks tips or want to give some input on anything?

Most of these have actually been discussed often on the board, probably the most common being:

I think you can search for prior threads on the teeth brushing, sleep issues, and on the toileting (even though I didn't highlight that as one of the most common, it does happen and has been discussed) to find good tips there.

Noise issues are very common, and noise cancelling headphones are commonly used, along with simple avoidance. My son eventually out grew this, so to speak, gradually being able to handle more and more uncomfortable noises, so that now it has to be pretty extreme to bother him. For some with AS it is a lifelong problem, however.

I simply helped my son with the dressing until he didn't want me to. And, low and behold, there came a day he just didn't want me to.

Clothes are a common problem and another of the things we generally recommend just going with - give them what they seem to need. If the choices become too seasonally inappropriate we have had some past threads on how to handle that, too.

Academics are an issue for many of our kids, and that is probably worth discussing further here, for there are some things that can be done to help. Reading is one I wouldn't freak out over, however, as it was an area my son was behind on when he was 8 or so, because he had tracking issues with the lines and also because he was frustrated by the low level of material he was able to read on his own, and much more interested in having someone read advanced material to him instead. Mostly we had to encourage him to keep at it, and sell him on why reading on his own would be so much better for him in the long run. It turns around fast when they gain enough fluency to be able to enjoy their reading, and not having that fluency is a common problem for 8 year olds, AS or NT.

And you are right about the change in behavior from school to home. There is only so much acting they have the energy for, and home needs to be the free place.

I wear socks to bed in winter. I also wear my watch in bed.


Have you tried to locate special socks? Especially appealing socks? OK, I know, it's a lot of searching to find really great, appealing socks. Disclosure: I'm a socks enthusiast.
.[img][800:1500]http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/91mdtcH-OHL._SL1500_.jpg[/img]
http://www.amazon.com/Disney-Cars-Black ... cr_pr_pb_t

Maybe get something like the ones pictured and without announcing it, put a pair somewhere he'd notice them. And if that worked, I'd place a second pair the next day.

This is likely a hypersensitivity and transitional issue. Try a toothpaste that doesn't burn.



In what sense does he not sleep well. Does he suffer from anxiety at night, or does have have difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep?



Many children on the spectrum have motor skills delays. You also have to understand that getting dressed can present as a large transition.



When I was a child I thought denim was the most abrasive feeling material in the world, second to burlap, and I wasn't sure how anyone would wear it. I wore cotton pants.



I generally didn't either. It was a transition and sensory issue. Having to change my clothes was a large inconvenience in my day and each new outfit required breaking in, so I much preferred to wear clothes that I had already broken in by wearing the ones I wore the previous day.



When he does change his socks, how many times, if any, does he have to adjust them? Do the seams bother him?



Or he can't be bothered to stop what he's doing and go, so he holds it until the last minute, which he never really estimates correctly, because in his mind, there is no time he has actually allocated for stopping what he is doing and going to the bathroom. There are children on the spectrum who would rather wet their pants than get up and go and parents find this to be such an alien concept that they conclude the child can't tell when they have to go.

If it is the case that it's a transition issue, you might try designated bathroom times. He might claim he doesn't have to go at those times, and he might not, but it would be to get him used to stopping what he is doing and going in to the bathroom, and also to drive home the point that he is going to end up in the bathroom at least twice a day anyway so he might as well get it over with. If he actually goes in to the bathroom at another time and goes in time, he does not have to attend one of the designated bathroom times.




Is there a possibility he could have Prader-Willi Syndrome, or could his medication be making him hungry?



In the past, children with AS had a tendency to do well at reading and writing, and poorly at arithmetic...not math in general mind you, just arithmetic oriented tasks, and children with HFA had difficulty with language oriented tasks but did well with arithmetic.



School is a structured environment where he is not allowed to be himself and where he does not have the ability defend himself should he get in trouble by one of the teachers or aids, so he probably puts a lot of energy into being good and minding, but as you can imagine, this likely causes him immense stress and I doubt most NT children have to deal with this.



Actually I think it's quite good because it demonstrates that he has a self awareness that instills in him the potential to someday function fairly well in life. He realizes he is different and that he needs to correct some of those differences to be socially fluent in life. You can help him by asking him critical thinking questions that pertains to social situations, and explicitly telling him how to go about socializing in some situations.

Realize though that children generally socialize different than adults so figuring out how to help him might take some observing and analyzing of your own.

I have to wear socks to bed as well...I do however try to change them every day but I forget sometimes and I'm 22. Anyways most of what you said about the clothes sound like sensory issues to me. When I was a kid I hated jeans, now I don't mind them if I find a comfortable pair but when I was a kid I did not know comfortable jeans existed.

As for the acedemic stuff, not everyone with AS has a super ability in math or any other acedemic subject.....I don't, I always had better than average reading skills but I don't feel that is too special just meant I could read at a higher level sooner than most of my classmates. Also though school was stressful because the other kids a lot of times where not very nice to me and would do whatever they could to upset me. So that did not really help matters.

The 8th and most forgotten sense: Interoception - sensing inside the body.
Mostly the messages sent by stretch receptor in internal organs - think breathing, a full or empty stomach, bladder or bowel.

Being under-responsive to these stimuli leads to not receiving the message that you are full or need to go to the bathroom.
Being over-responsive would mean feeling full after only eating a small amount or only feeling hungry when you're starving, holding your breath without really realising etc.

Many people with sensory processing difficulties can be over and under-responsive at different times or with different senses.

The desire for spicy food is also an indication of oral under-responsiveness, he is a Sensory Seeker for taste sensations because everything tastes bland to him. But he is over-responsive to either the sensation of the toothbrush or the taste of the toothpaste or the weird sensation of his mouth filling with foam. You can try different toothpaste flavours, but that introduces a change, which can be hard to handle. If you could convince him at a calm time to do a taste test of a loads of different flavours to pick one that works for him. You could also try a vibrating toothbrush, might be worse, might be better.

I agree with previous posters that the clothing issues are likely a combination of sensory and transition difficulties.

Do you work with an OT? One familiar with Sensory Processing and Sensory Integration.

Thank you all, I love hearing from other moms who have dealt with similiar issues and I definitely love hearing the points of view from other Aspies on these things! It helps me so much because for so long I just felt we were so alone and I felt helpless. Just in the past year have I realized what is going on with Blake and to just help me along instead of trying to make him fit into this little box that everyone else's kids fit in to.

Thanks DW a mom, I am glad to know the reading may be a bit of a struggle and that is common. I have been so worried about the deficit he has in academics and I think I am going to relax more. My main concern is that I want to do whatever I can to give him the best opportunity to learn HIS way. You mentioned that your son had tracking issues with the lines...how did you know this? Was he able to tell you? Blake has had the regular behavioral and academic testing but are there other tests you might recommend that helped you figure it out?

Chronos- thank you so much for all of your input. That helps me SO VERY MUCH! I think you are right about all of it. To answer your questions...with the sleeping- he has a bit of difficulty falling asleep but the more often issue staying asleep. He awakes randomly and just can't go back to sleep. He takes an anti-hyperentinsive but if I up the dosage he is not himself and groggy and irritable. If he doesn't have the meds, he doesnt sleep...maybe 4 hours a night.

socks- he seems to like the ones we have now but he does often adjust them but definitely wants to keep them. I got him a pair of soft fuzzy socks and he loved them so I think I might continue to get more of those

I will have to check Prader-Willi Sndrome, I've never heard of it, the meds somehow help him to not want to constantly eat. Let me correct that, he still wants to eat more than he needs, but its wild and uncontrollable wihtout the meds.

Thanks so much for your other comments and everyone else too....I can't express how nice it feels to finally hear people who get it!! !! !! !

DoodleSam, yes the clothing and the other regular sensory stuff I can deal with and he can deal with. I just came to the realization that in the grand scheme of things I don't care what he wears as long as it doesn't hurt him in some way. I definitely can relate to what you speak of regarding Interoception. That sounds very on target with him. His med, intuniv, helped the eating habits a bit and I noticed he didn't like spicy as much anymore. Also, now that you mention the breathing...I've always noticed that he has his mouth open all of the time. He told me the other day he breathes through his mouth instead of his nose and I said is your nose stopped up and he said no, I just don't break through it. (not sure that has to do with anything..?)

He is not in OT yet, I JUST came to this realization in December. He was diagnosed with ADHD, hence the meds, and things just didn't get all that much better and school work was not getting better and I just said to the therapist that it is something else and we are in a state of crisis with me trying to make him be different, and school is torture from what it looked like to me. I showed her a list of all of the things we had issues with and a journal and she said AS. When he doesn't have the Intuniv, he rocks back and forth alot too. Anyway, it wasn't until she mentioned it that I knew anything about AS so I've been doing some reading and researching and I never in his 8 years felt like it finally made sense. So that was a long way of saying he isn't seeing an OT yet, but I am setting it up soon. He will be tested officially this month, we have a neuro appt in Feb, and I will be happy to learn more about the resources in my area! I'm going to do some research about finding an OT today since you mention it.

That leads me to 2 more questions...though I will ask the therapist on the next appointment, but is medication common and helpful or more harmful? It was a very hard thing for me to medicate him, though with Intuniv I did see some quality of life improvements for him big time. But it's still scary. Are meds common or is it better to figure things out naturally??

He has traits from both my older son with high-functioning classic autism and my younger son with AS/OCD.

My older son has learning disabilities--information retrieval being the most severe--that impact all academic areas. His short-term memory is below what would be expected for his IQ, too.

Both boys also have various sensory issues--not wanting to wear long pants, not wanting teeth brushed, not wanting hair washed or combed, need for several blankets at bedtime, regardless of the temperature.

Please check out the various resources on my free website, www.freevideosforautistickids.com, for educational aids and information on various symptoms and learning disabilities.

Awesome Blondeambition, I will check it out. Thanks! btw love your screen name

That is the real issue with all our kids, the opportunity to learn their way, and many schools simply are not up to providing that. There are so many little things that can go on and adjustments that can be made, but I'm afraid I'm not up to speed on all of them. The issues I dealt with the most were the stress/anxiety of doing the work (and I know tools for dealing with that) and writing (my son has severe hypermobility/hypotonia/disagraphia, and I can write books on the process for getting through that).

The tracking issues were picked up by the school and handled by the resource specialist, who I believe gave him some kinds of exercises to do. They also picked up on board to paper transfer issues, which they also worked on through resource. Since that all seemed comfortably handled at school, I'm afraid I don't know much more than that. They told me the issues existed, they told me what they were doing, and I moved my brain and effort onto the things that no one had a ready answer for. Usually schools are super well tuned into reading problems, with a pretty solid bag of tricks for helping kids through them.

On another topic, I think I forgot to say anything about the over-eating issues, and I should note that we have had prior threads on that, as well. It wasn't my issue so I don't remember what all was involved, but there should be discussion you can pull up in a search. I think a common approach is to keep low calorie, healthy food handy for the child, no restrictions, while locking up everything else. But I'd find the threads instead of relying on my memory for that.

That is a loaded question. I worry that meds are more common than they need to be as it seems like doctors jump right into medication as soon as AS is mentioned, even though there is no medication specifically for AS (it is all for co-morbids). But. You have a pretty big list of issues all going on simultaneously, and if meds are needed to handle a few of those while you sort things out on the others, sometimes it really is the best answer.

You do get a better view when the child is not on any medication, to dig deep into the heart of what is really going on, and we were able to solve the most critical of my son's issues while never giving anything to my son. But both you and your child need to be able to get by day to day, and in many cases the only way to do that is to use medication. If you feel you and your child can function without it, even if it is a little less pleasant for all of you, then it is worth considering if they should be dropped. But, as I said, you do seem to have a lot going on, and the flip side is the possibility of allowing your child to suffer with something that could easily be treated. Since we don't use anything, I can't address the pros and cons of what you are currently using, and I don't know what falls into what category, but that is my general position on it.

I would also ask how your son feels about his medications, and how he describes their effects, and factor that into your thought process.

Last edited by DW_a_mom on 05 Jan 2012, 12:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Good to know, thanks I will look up those issues in other threads definitely!

I am going to be patient on the school front while we still are working everything out. When I get a diagnosis I'm hoping public school can address things better, but I have a sneaking suspicion that might be wishful thinking right now. I go observe him in school and at this point I am not so much worried that he isn't scoring what he should be, I'm worried about his happiness and sense of self. This year school has really taken a toll on that part of him. So my current goal in school for him right now is for him to see some success in what he CAN do and that is just really hard in the typical classroom. But I see lots of positive things coming out of 2012, especially with my new friends at WrongPlanet giving me some good insight!! !

Yes, DW a Mom, that was my thought was that are we really seeing the full scope if meds are covering up some symptoms, and if not...how do we know we are handling things properly. But I'm with you....right now, we need it, day to day no question. However, he takes a stimulant that I can't really say that about....we will see what the therapist says. In regard to asking him about it, I have talked to him and he doesn't mind taking it at all...he realizes he can't sleep without it and he says he 'runs around' if he doesn't take it. haha

Regarding meds and tracking:

Meds are commonly used in some places, particularly in the U. S., and less commonly used elsewhere.

http://youtu.be/ePSynbLLazA

Above is a free YouTube video on my Autistic Kids Channel on medication use. It was part of a series of seminars presented at Yale University by prominent doctors and professors. The rest of the Yale University presentations are in the "favorites" section on my channel.

http://youtu.be/YFQZekpKxW4

Above is a presentation by a child psychiatrist and professor at a distinguished American university about a research paper on ASD and comorbid psychiatric conditions.

Basically, Abilify (aripiprazole) and Risperdal (risperidone) have been FDA approved for use in the U.S. to treat irritability associated with ASD. These are atypical antipsychotics and can have significant side effects; however, they are appropriate for some children.

If you can identify a specific comorbid condition that is commonly treated with a specific medication ( OCD is commonly treated with Prozac [fluoxetine], for instance), you may find a lot of relief for your child with fewer side effects than if you use one of the atypical antipsychotics.

Some kids have to be on more than one med, and if they are, parents should be especially careful of overmedication, drug interactions, and side effects.

My older son has visual tracking issues, and the best way that I've found to identify these issues is to have him read aloud to me. It is also beneficial for a child with these issues to read aloud from a book on his reading level to the parent on a daily basis. The parent can sit beside the child and remind the child to read every word. The parent can also place a ruler under each line as the child reads it so that the child is prevented from skipping lines.

The above process works, but it is not fast, particularly if the child is a slow learner anyway.

Good luck!

In my sons' cases, meds actually helped to provide a clearer picture of learning disabilities and speech issues. Behaviors and anxiety were too distracting to get a clear picture of the needs in these areas.