AS kid with AS parent needs friends

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Okay, so I'm an Aspie and so is my son. He's 10 and doesn't really have any friends. We live in a "kind of" affluent area and most of the parents of his peers are old enough to be MY parents! So, here I am- AS, very young looking, in my career I work odd hours, etc. and so play dates and such haven't happened often. Plus, I'm just not into the social games that most of the moms around here play. Many of them are stay at home moms, super involved, always trying to one-up each other in cars, appearance, "stuff"... so what do I do? I want to try to find my child a friend but it seems we're both "outsiders." Moving is not an option, as my place of employment is less than a mile away.

Look for a local Aspergers Friendship Club or equivalent. I am just getting into this with my child. I personally find arranging playdates difficult.

hmm, I don't know if this is going to be too off the wall for a suggestion or not, but I do sympathize with your predicament. it is usually easier to help your child have friends if you can relate to the other parents, so it doesnt sound like that parents at your child's school would be very easy to get to know.

So, my idea is, do you know of a Unitarian Universalist church in your area? They are very open, and sort of spiritual rather than religious, they are really focused on social justice issues and becoming a good person rather than a specific set of rules. What they do tend to have is a young adult group, and possibly a group of young parents with all different types of families (Adopted, special needs, etc) and they might be more culturally diverse than just the affluent PTA parents you've met at school. Ive found them to be quite welcoming, and that is a place I would certainly look for like minded parents, with children who are being raised to accept diversity (which is great for making new friends, right? more potential friends)

I hope this isn't too quirky of an idea, it is simply something that came to my mind based on my experiences and what you said you were looking for.

Good luck, let us know if you find any solutions!

Somewhere hiding in that community must be at least one other mom who isn't into all the games. The trick is going to be finding her.

Otherwise, after school activities are great ways for kids to bond. Both my children have made friends through religion class, and my daughter has made many friends going to after care at school. Car pools are good, too, interestingly enough, but that kind of throws back to paragraph 1, since parents tend to be the instigators with car pools.

One thing I've observed, for better and for worse, is that cell phone becomes an important social tool in middle school, at least around here. Some of my daughter's new friendships were very much directed by the fact she was one of the ones with a phone, and able to text. Boy social life is driven by it less, but there still does come a time it seems expected, and the primary method of contact.

Some kids who had no friends in elementary did find a social group in middle school, simply because the pond is bigger, just FYI.

I have found that I don't have to make BFFs with the other moms in order for my sons to have friends, when they were younger yes, but from the ages of about 9 on no. What seems to be required is only that you are presentable and friendly, and available for phone calls, emails and/or a brief chat at the door when dropping off or picking up your kid so that the other parent can develop enough of a good impression of you to trust you to host their child for playdates etc. and vice versa.