Could this be a form of stimulation for my 3 yo?

Post Reply New Topic

My son seems to always want to be on the go. If we are in a store, he doesn't care where we go, as long as we keep walking. If we stop, he starts tugging my hand and telling me to "let's go", If we are in the car and driving, he is as happy as can be. If I park for more than 5 mins, he starts getting upset and wants to either come out of his car seat, or for us to keep driving. He doesn't seem to care where we go, but he seems to think that once we leave the house, we should keep going.

Sometimes, if it's just a quick trip (like 10 mins), he does not want to go in the yard and tries pull me away from our gate and for us to continue walking. He does ask (in his own way) to go outside for a walk or to the park and for the most part seems content when he is inside.

Could his need for movement and going to new places be a form of stimulation?

It sounds like it to me. Maybe he enjoys what he encounters on those trips?

Either way, at least he's active.

When he is out, he is widen eyed and taking everything in. He acts as if he is trying to absorb everything he sees and hears. I though that would overstimulate him but itdoesn't seem to do that. If he is in the car, he is looking through the side windows and through the front to see where you are going. He is generally happy doing this. If we are outside, he is checking out the planes, buses and trucks and calling out "I see the..." Sometimes he even points. He only seems to remember that he is tired when we go home.

Have you ever asked him why he likes going on trips?

He is 3 and his communication is delayed. I would not be able to get such a complicated answer from him.

my son was like that to an extent. Shopping meant dashing thru the store in and out of he would cry if I started to slow down.

Does your son PLAY at the park, or just walk around looking at things. I could see the benefit of trying to slow him down a bit. Not evertyhing in life is go go go. I always try to see if my sons behaviors are functional or not. If they arent, then we try to moidify them in a way. It is GREAT in the car, casue you are trapped and nothing else to do, but at the park there is plenty to do.

What happens if you take him to the library or mommy and me class? Does he participate?

When we are in the store, he understands now that he needs to hold my hand and doesn't protest about doing so, however, if I stop to check something out, after a couple mins, hestarts pulling me away. If he is in the cart, he just goes along with what I am doing.

If we are at the park, he plays for a while and then he wants to explore and then he wants to leave so we can walk around the block a bit. If my husband takes him, he plays longer and tries more daring things. He will happily and eagerly swing for my husband but is usually done after after a couple minutes when I put him on the swing.

If we go to the library, he gets bored in one place and wants to explore the place. He loves to read so giving him a book is the only way to distract him. If we don't keep moving, he will have a tantrum where he drops to the ground and cry or whine. He sucks his thumb and uses it to calm himself down pretty fast. Unfortunately, that means I have to pick him up off the floor since he will just lie there and look at me and suck his thumb.

He does ask for his walks most days.

Wow, I cant get my nine year old out of the house !
Guess we all go our issues huh?

I'm much the same way- I enjoy getting out and "doing things", as opposed to sitting at home,
but when I do go, they are missions, and not for pleasure.

For instance, I've just about given up on going to the grocery with anyone because I get so profoundly irritated at them.

I'm there to BUY FOOD AND BRING IT HOME
not to spend three minutes looking at magazine covers
or to spend seven minutes talking to little old ladies about the weather we've been having
and CERTAINLY not to spend twenty minutes doing price comparisons.
I research prices and nutritional info on products before I leave home, so it isn't necessary to do in the store.

Perhaps your son feels that any delays which cause you to stop are impeding the trips "progress", which is a specific mission with X objective.

Could it be the motion itself? Not saying your theory isn't right, just something else to think about: your description reminds me of parents with a colicky baby. Have you tried stationary things that vibrate (washing machine, vibrating seat cushions, back massagers, treadmills, trampoulines, etc.)

Does he react in the same way to television, or new reading material?

Another thing - is he reacting to the things on their own, or is he using new things as a bridge to communicate with you? Could be this is social in some way - maybe he knows how to talk about something new, but not something you've already talked about.

I'm just taking shots in the dark, here, so don't take anything I write as anything other than that.

liloleme - you are right, we all have our issues. Apparently my son thinks he is a nomad.

ValentineWiggin - if you are right, then everything that we do outside of the house has a purpose, but when we are at home, purpose becomes relative. He is pretty laid back about everything at home (unless he is hungry, thirsty, sleepy, etc then he gets upset if I don't understand what he wants). Also, I find it funny that if he walk, he wants to keep it moving, but if he is in his stroller, he just takes it all in. But at the same time, if he is in the car seat, he feels he needs to move.

momsparky - he is fine when he is home and doesn't seem to need a lot of motion. He can sit still and play if it is something that he likes. The only thing motion wise that I can think of is he likes to play "upside down" sometimes. He likes the downdog yoga pose and sometimes sticks one leg up while he is in that pose. He some will even hang off the sofa, upside down. He will do his upside down activities for maybe 2-3 mins about 4-5 times a day (more or less).

He loves his old books and will read them to himself. He really likes new books also. He will pay attention most times to the TV if it is one of his shows or a commercial he likes ortherwise it's hit or miss. I think to communicate with me, he usually says, "I see the..." then I ask him where is it and we go from there. He memorized a few ways to begin a conversation and uses that. We all get, "Hey (insert name) wha'cha doing?" When you reply, he may repeat some of what you said or say OK then move on to the next person. When he does this he makes strong eye contact and appears to expect an answer. Once he gets an answer, he moves on. He is not able to carry on a back and forth conversation for long.w

He has a good amount of echolalia going on, but the change now is he will pinpoint a word that I say, search his memory for that word, and give me the entire string of what he memorized that included that word. So for example, if I say "I like boats" He may reply "Row row row your boat..."

MomofThree1975, my daughter is exactly the same. She needs to be in motion all the time, be it in the car or shopping or just a walk and she's happy. She is almost 4 now and still non verbal but fully understands most of what is being told to her. Infact sometimes it becomes difficult because she drags us to the door and wants to go for a walk at odd times of the day. The Occupational Therapist said its her way of relaxing when she is stressed or overwhelmed with something. I've got nothing to advise you on but just letting you know that you are not alone with this one.

Do you talk to him about what the plan is or what you are doing? I ask because perhaps his desire to keep going is due to anxiety of not knowing what is going on or what is going to happen next. As was already suggested, maybe he thinks shopping is going through the store and stopping only long enough to put items in the basket. When you stop longer to look at things and compare labels or whatever you are breaking the "rule" of what shopping is supposed to be in his mind. Even though his communication may be delayed, it is likely that his understanding of your speech is more developed than his ability to speak himself. Mind you, that's not a medical opinion just a hunch. Talk to him about what is happening and what is going to happen next. If his behavior is related to anxiety about what is going on around him, your explanations may help. Just a thought!

autismdad2011 - Does your daughter need to be moving all the time or only when you are running errands or taking a walk? Apart from wanting to go for a walk, does she show any other signs of being stressed? How does she handle going to school where she has to be somewhere else and can't move around as she would like?

Bombaloo - Do you think in his mind, the "rules" don't apply if he is in a stroller or shopping cart? He doesn't mind if I stop if he is in a shopping cart or a stroller. Also, he looks at everything, not an anxious way, but as if it is all very interesting. I figured by now he wouldn't be so "interested" in everyday things we see outside.

maybe the stroller or cart have reules in his mind, like in the stroller or cart we sit and look. But when he is walking free there is so much opprotunity, stimulation, distractions, etc...that he doesnt know how to center himself, not sure what the tules are, so he is go go go and looking around to try and make sence of the world...just my guess.

Well, with moving all the time it really depends on the day she has. Going to school and therapy involves a bit of travel so the car ride also keeps her calm. If she misses school or has a day off there is definitely more walking required to keep her calm. also if she's had a busy day then she is fine when she goes out shopping with us without having to keep moving all the time. So I would say she does need approx 1 - 2 hours of some type of movement, either walking or car. At school at times she needs to wander around a bit around the classroom or sometimes she just needs to come outside for a few minutes and then she is fine again.

Her major signal of stress is her twisting her fingers, she's had this issue for a while now and if she keeps doing it constantly we know she is getting stressed about something. she's never done the closing the ears or rocking back and forth but the finger twist is her main giveaway. Being non verbal does make things a little difficult so at times, if we dont pick up on her signals she just drags us out wanting to go for a walk so she has kinda figured it out too that walking or moving calms her down. No one has been able to give us any advice on how to overcome this.