I wish my parents were just dead.

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I just practically hate my parents a lot. From a young tender age, they have constantly abused me, from beating me black and blue to mentally abusing me. When I was young around the age of 3, I threw a slipper at something to kill a bug, and then my dad beat me black and blue, another incident is when a violin string just got out of tune and then they beat me, another time is when all of the violin strings burst out, and then they beat me. They are such cheap people who have all the excuses in the world to abuse and give me unhappiness. It's disappointing to note that they call this so called "shock therapy", when it is actually infact physical abuse. My dad at one stage called me a "f*****g as*hole" , "donkey", "idiot", and among others.


I am happy that god punished him and gave him diabetes as a result of his constant abuse against me. I am just praying to god that they just die and I can party in peace.

Would you really be able to survive on your own, let alone "party in peace"? I don't doubt that your parents have been terrible, but the fact that you are on this website makes me suspect that they have been terrible because they are frustrated that you are not as "normal" and "independent" as they might want you to be. Or maybe I'm just projecting.

I have experienced enough abuse, and as an Asperger, I feel heavily hurt by that. And yes, you are actually projecting.

When was younger my father used to beat me black and blue. Only the blue wore off.

Sounds like there might be more going on than you are saying...why would they beat you because a violin string is out of tune? What happened?

Have you told anyone in person? Your school, for instance, or your doctor are required to take allegations of abuse seriously and investigate them. You should probably think it through very carefully if you plan to take that course of action if there is any possibility you are exaggerating because you are angry. (physical abuse = nonaccidental physical injury (ranging from minor bruises to severe fractures or death) is child abuse, according the the US dept. of Health an Human Services http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsh ... tiscan.cfm )

You can call the National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-252-2873 or ChildHelp USA: 1-800-422-4453.

Your best bet is to here for online chat support or for more information on what you can do (it doesn't apply just to runaways, and I would definitely contact them before considering that option:) http://www.1800runaway.org/youth/nrs_can_help/

Momsparky is right on the money.

Your religious delusion is downright ridiculous. If this "god" would give your father diabetes to punish him for abusing you, than what is it punishing you for? Either all illnesses and disabilities are a punishment, or none of them is! Following your own distorted pseudo--logic, your AS would have to be a divine punishment as well.

i wish my parents were alive.

Sorry, but it's just that you have given us very little context.

I am perfectly prepared to believe that your parents are awful monsters. But there are some aspects of your story which are making me think that your condition is relevant. For one, you are posting here, and you admit that you have AS, so you must feel that there is a connection. For another thing, you mentioned that your parents call the abuse "shock therapy". This suggests that they might think of it as a way to "fix" you.

That doesn't excuse your parents' behaviour, but it does help to provide context. Parents of children with AS often feel embarrassed or desperate that their child is "broken", especially if they secretly suspect that they might somehow have "caused" it by being bad parents.

If you are minor aged, report the abuse either to school, family doc, police, or one of the resources mentioned by MomSparky.

If you are an adult move out. If you can't afford to live on your own, move to a shelter, like the Salvation Army shelter. Also, report the abuse, file charges against your parents, and get pix of your bruises. Remember, besides filing criminal charges, you may be able to also file civil charges for monetary damages. You may be able to get a Legal Aid attorney. They have a sliding fee scale, and may take nothing from you or a small amount, based on your ability to pay.

Do you have a formal diagnosis of an Autism spectrum disorder? If you have an official diagnosis, you can go to the local welfare office and apply for benefits based on your disability, even while still living with your parents. Among those you should try for are:

- Medicaid for medical coverage
- Cash assistance to pay your own bills
- Housing Assistance once you have your own place
- Food stamps once you do your own food shopping.

It's up to YOU to start the ball rolling on getting help for yourself. YOU need to report the abuse. YOU need to get out of that abusive home. YOU need to go to the welfare office to apply for assistance. So get off your duff and go get some help!

I second this!

It doesn't matter why they are doing it. It is abuse. Report them to the police if this is still happening and get away from them.

It is definitely abuse no matter what. But it does matter why they are doing it, if you ever want to reconcile with them.

Alright, so I've just spoken to my mother and father about why they have been attacking me physically.

Alright, the thing is that, when I was young, I had a tendency to be rather mischievous (doesn't anyone become so?), and I had a habit of doing naughty things like biting others (which I have stopped doing today, but that was me as a mischievous child), This had my parents to develop some sort of insecurity, and at that time, they didn't know anything about Aspergers until I was 10 years old, and they felt that the only way to set me right was to hit me and spank me, and in very violent tendencies, at one stage giving me bruises to my face, and I could have nearly lost my life because of that. Until I was 10, she realized that I was an autistic child and not an ordinary child, so she stopped the hitting gradually and it all finally stopped when I was 12. Today, when I reminded them of this, they recall on how emotional it makes them feel because those felt those actions made them feel like very abusive parents.

The physical abuse has occasionally continued into adulthood, and me and my mom occasionally get into verbal arguments and often attacks mainly because she is frustrated with my dad or just out of misunderstanding. I have repeatedly spoken to my mom to stop, and it appears that she has stopped finally. However, I will assume good faith for now and see how my arguments have convinced her to stop the abuse. I'm not expecting her to be completely nice that she'll let me get on and do something stupid though.

My dad, on the other hand, has also been feeling as an abusive parent all those years and he is today quite unprepared to take on the role to parent me after all those years of hardline abuse. While the physical abuse has stopped today, I will reiterate once more, I'll test this as a good faith attempt and see how far this goes. My dad is offering to help me get used to the real world out there and he says to me that if I say something, just try to take is as an attempt as improvement for next time as I want you to understand how the real world may be out there. This is not to say that he is verbally abusing me in any kind. He has since stopped indefinitely.

My mother has actually cried in front of me to apologize and also on behalf of my dad for all those years of verbal and physical abuse that was predominantly responsible for the miserable youth I had as a child.

It's fortunate that I do not have parents who are like Butter's parents from South Park who ground their son for the most lousiest of things and beat them on the same basis as well, because those are parents who are a perfect role model for the abusive parents, and their parenting skills are inferior and damage the well and mental being of their own son.

The physical things have stopped, and I wish you all good night

Honestly I don't blame you that sounds pretty horrid.