When parents use their younger children?

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Like today I finally tried coming out to my mom that i drank excessive amounts of alcohol just to make it through the year, because she got on me about being slightly drunk again as if her and her other family doesn't do it just as much if not more. Well all she could say is 'dont say so much in front of your little brother, your basically damaging him by being honest. Well what the f**** does she want. Clearly I don't live up to the examples she tries to set and all I do is bring things down. So what the hell do I do with this...already out of cigs again because I am an idiot and could use some more.

Your profile says you're 23. If that's the case, you really need to let go of your childhood and start living your life as an adult. That means making your own choices and taking responsibility for them; deciding what you want to do with your life, and taking the initiative to do it.

Concerning your mother telling you not to say much in front of your little brother, she actually was treating you as an adult in that instance. And part of being an adult is acting responsible and as a good role model around children.

So what motivation does she have to object to you doing it? Concern for you (ie love, however poorly expressed) and her not wanting you to make the mistakes she did.



This is a false dichotomy- those are not the only two options. It's an issue you and your mom should discuss in private.



No, you're exactly living up to the example she has set. That's what's worrying her (and, I'd guess, making her feel she's failed you). She knows where that lifestyle leads and wants to spare you (and your brother) that.
Try it. Tell her some random guy on the internet thinks she's hoping you will be better than she is.