How do you tell your child!~

Post Reply New Topic

How did you tell your child if you have, that they are on the spectrum ?

I told him his brain processed information in a different way and because of this some things that are hard for other people are easy for him and some things that are easy for other people are hard for him. I told him that everyone had different strengths and weaknesses and the world needed all of them.

My take on this, first as some suggest I do NOT like the term "burger syndrome" I always feel we know our own children best and when ready like everything else, I tend to deal with each situation for both my nt and aspie children the same, if an issue or a problem arises deal with it.

I do not feel we need to tell young children as such, why have them stress over a label unnecessarily, after all we are all born as unique individuals on and off the spectrum, I often feel its better for parents to teach children about diversity and difference when they start school!

If had to put a name on it prefer something like spectrumite, or was it special mite

and I agree with Tony Attwoods quote:
From my clinical experience I consider that children and adults with Asperger Syndrome have a different, not defective, way of thinking.

and Aimless totally agree with what you say quote:
"I told him his brain processed information in a different way and because of this some things that are hard for other people are easy for him and some things that are easy for other people are hard for him. I told him that everyone had different strengths and weaknesses and the world needed all of them."
EXACTLY

asplanet wrote:

I just told my kids that they're like me, a bit different from other people - not better, not worse, just different.

I've also told them that there are lots of different people and that all of those different people are different from each other too. Everyone is an individual.

I gave them the example of this "guy" who asked a question that nobody else had thought about. He said, "hey, why don't we float? - why are we stuck to the ground?". Everyone else around him took it for granted but this guy was sitting under a tree when an apple fell on his head and he asked - "why did it fall, why couldn't it float".

I asked my kids if they knew why and they shouted out "Gravity!".

I told them that Newton was special and different because he saw things that other people didn't notice.

I know that's a rather inaccurate version of Newton but I think it got the message across.

I like that example gbollard

My mom didn't tell me AS is a form of autism or on the spectrum. She just said I had a different learning style and I view things differently and I need more information when I get told to do something. She didn't tell me that was why I get so obsessed or know so much about my interests or why I am literal. She just told me the time when she told me to stop that teasing I did another tease and I couldn't understand how that was AS. She did say "stop that teasing" so I did so I always thought she mispoke.

Hiya, well I invented a whole new programme for my kids and I am delighted to say it is working very well. It is called Jacobs Ladder and can all be found on www.jelibean.com

Here is a link, we call ourselves jelibeans (explanation within the link!) that way it's friendly, kind and gentle. I told my kids and still tell them they are incredibly privileged to be on the Autism Spectrum....it is only a scary place when you don't know much about it....but with gentle ways and talking in TIPS (Talking in Pictures) you can make it very easy for yourself.

I hope it helps you as much as it has helped me and mine! Good luck and tell your little jelibean, there are plenty of us about and we welcome him into the tribe...oh one other thing......we at Jelibean firmly believe in genetics...and it takes a jelibean or two to make a jelibaby...................just a thought

Here we are Jelibeans and Marshmallows! We like to call neurotypicals something fun to, else they get jealous
Here is a taster and full link to article beneath!

This is what I told my kids. Imagine a sweet shop, you know, one of those really old fashioned ones, the ones with a bell that rings as you open the door, the shopkeeper with his white pinny on, standing behind the counter, guarding the array of jars that line the shelves - the smell, colour and variety of those jars, scores of different types. Standing proudly in the centre are two jars, side by side, one full up to the rim of the lid with jellybeans, and the other full of marshmallows. Both jars are appealing and eye-catching for different reasons.

Jellybeans are a rainbow of colours, different sizes and shades, but more importantly very different flavours (pina colada is a personal fave of mine). Jellybeans are renowned for their brittle outside shell, but with that soft melting chewy bit in the centre. They're unpredictable, you never know quite what you have till the flavour has taken over your taste buds, by which time, it's too late, if you find you don't like it and want to spit it out.

Marshmallows, however, all appear similar, pink and white fluffy neat shapes that don't really taste of very much except a comforting sweetness. Marshmallows are enjoyable and they're squishy, popping back into shape easily. Dip your hand in a bag of marshmallows and you're pretty sure of what you're going to get. You can eat them for ever.

Likening people to jellybeans and marshmallows is easy and fun. It takes a very personal issue and makes it impersonal, therefore eliminating any blame, and any of those confusing labels that these experts pin on us and our children. I felt my Type One children were like little jumping jellybeans, colourful, tasty, and different. They each had their shimmering shells, and there were surprisingly jelly-like and uncertain little hearts and minds inside that bright thin shell.



http://www.jelibean.com/ladder2/index.p ... &Itemid=79

OMG, my son says "meh" all the time! It's his general, all purpose response to any inquiry as to how he is feeling/doing!

For a year, our son has known that he probably has Aspergers. 3 weeks ago, we got the final, "medical" diagnosis (though we've all known it as soon as we started to read about it.) There's been a bunch of back and forth, but our family comes late to the "game", as he is almost 14, and we've been struggling for 4 years or so.

My sense is that he is (almost too) comfortable with it. It's as if he understands himself more than we do, and more than he understands the rest of the world.

I don't know how you "tell" a school-ager, but our teen seems to have been way ahead of us! Our task seems more to undo the soul-crushing messages that we and others have given him, and information about Aspergers seems to help him. We are careful to talk about it in terms of how we're coming to understand his needs without giving him the sense that we don't love him for who he is. (Major fail about 50% of the time, but we keep at it!) I'm no expert, but I do know kids and they need to feel loved and protected, along with being challenged.

Best wishes!

I made a video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAFPdyM_Olg I guess it was as a release for me initially but when he saw it he loved it and asked if I could put it on YouTube so he could be a " SuperStar" lol. So I did.

Sorry fixed the link now

that was so wonderful thanks for sharing. Now I want to make one

I´d tell the kid that he thinks differently and that he has a different wiring of the brain, but that it makes him smarter than other kids. It´s not completely true, but it could be helpful.

Holy Batman, necro bump


When my mother first told me, I was in the 6th grade and she told me I have a different way of learning and seeing things and I my brain works different. She also told me I have a different learning style and I learn differently than others.