aggressive behavior getting worse!

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I haven't posted for a couple of weeks now, have been very busy! My son (6, in Kindergarten) behavior has just really gotten worse all of a sudden. He is scratching at other kids, hard enough to draw blood on one kid because my son wanted the "goldenrod" crayon and the other boy had it. (He has a thing about colors--normally kind of cute). He has been doing this on the bus frequently, and this morning he bit someone in addition to scratching them. I still believe the bus issues are not entirely his fault, my hunch says he is being provoked I just can't prove it. I know his communication skills are horrible and he is not able to tell me what is going on. We have taken him to the doctor (twice) because in the past he has acted up like this when he is sick but there is nothing wrong with him! They even did bloodwork just to make sure. I am at a loss as to what to do. I should be hearing from the school principal tomorrow one way or another because I am SO MAD about the bus issue because it has been going on for awhile and I have been all over this multiple times with the driver, all my son's teachers and the principal. I guess I don't really have a question, I am just wanting to vent!! !!

Hi, I am new here, but I feel your pain. My daughter is 6, and also in K. She was really adjusting better than expected in school. After winter break we have seen an increase in her aggression. She has been kicking a little girl in her class, tripping people, and throwing crayons. The school has been really understanding but I just don't know what to do. She came home yesterday and told me that her best friend said that her mom said they could not be friends anymore. My daugter didn't really seem upset, but it just breaks my heart. I am still new to learing about Aspergers. I have been reading up trying to undestand how she thinks, but it is so hard.

Hi - I'm new too. My son is 14 and has always had bus problems. I wish I could tell you it gets better. At the moment he has an assigned seat near the driver because he threatened to shoot someone with a gun. I have no doubt he was provoked and fortunately he wasn't suspended but he was given an asssigned seat. Nothing of course happened to the other person and he was right pissed off about it. "Everybody else can sit where they want but I have to sit in front - it's not fair" I'm sure you're all familar with that line.

Your kids' aggression sounds like stress to me. Time and develpment go a long way to resolving some of this but it's so hard watching them struggle and not really be able to help. Mine has decided that humans are eeeeeevilllll.

Keep the faith - it will get better!

oh yes, I am sure he is being provoked, I just can't prove it! I am so mad about this. He does sit in the front so the bus driver can keep an eye on him (supposedly). I think the bus driver is letting the other kids antaganize (sp?) him though. There is NO EXCUSE for 2 other boys to be in the same seat with him when there are empty seats on the bus. He KNOWS about my son and that he is touch sensitive etc. His teacher told me today that there is a bus monitor because there are some preschoolers that have to ride also, (news to all of us--teacher included). So why isn't my son sitting near if not with the monitor????? He would make her job easier! He would love nothing more than to just sit there and read a book to the younger kids, it would entertain them and keep him occupied! I talked to his regular class teacher this morning and she agrees with me that they are doing something to him and that he should be able to sit alone as soon as it is available, I haven't talked to the resource teacher yet and the principal is at central office and I am waiting to hear back from them, there is NO WAY my son is going to get in trouble for all of this!

Why is it so hard to get through to these people? Unstructured, unsupervised time=bad for aspies! This is not rocket science. It's like they intentionally choose to not understand the problem. And the solutions are really simple. Supervise them!! ! Cameras on the bus wouldn't hurt either. Sorry, it's a pet peeve of mine.

The bus monitor sounds uninformed or inexperienced. Any chance you can talk to her personally with suggestions. Your ideas are good. Sitting by himself is a no brainer and not hard to implement.

Sounds like you have some support at school. That's good. It's an endurance contest, exhausting but necessary. Good luck!

it sounds like there's a direct correlation between the new behavior you're seeing and the issues on the bus~hope things get settled quick!

I talked to the principal, and he is going to talk to the bus driver and make sure that he gets his own seat ASAP, and there is now a camera on the bus My son will have to sit in the third seat to make sure he appears on the camera but that is progress!! The principal (my favorite person today) agrees though that the bus driver is an idiot. And the kid he "bit" has no marks on him at all.

I know this is probably something that you have already thought about, but are you able to drive him to school? I always drove my son to school because I knew he had trouble handling the sensory issues on the bus. The smell of exhaust, the noise, the vibration, etc... This was before I even knew that he had AS or that AS even existed. He would come home crying every day begging me to not make him take the bus.

My ex-husband kept telling me that he had to take the bus because he would make friends with those that lived around him and that if I drove him it would limit his opportunities for socialization. My ex and I had many fights about this, but I refused to put my son back on the bus. I knew that it was torture for him, I just didn't know why.

You might also be able to get him special transportation on the special needs bus, but that could open up a whole other can of worms with teasing.

I have thought about taking him, I could do it, it would be difficult because I would have to drag my 3 yr. old out of bed to ride with us but I can do that if neccessary. Usually all his problems are in the afternoon, this one was the first time ever we have had a morning issue. I still think the bratty little kid was bothering him. The principal did talk to the driver for me though and ever since he has had a seat to himself. I am waiting to see how long this lasts, but their is a monitor on the bus and technically she is only responsible for the two preschool kids but she is keeping an eye on my son (and the other kids around him). She may not be able to intervene, but she might be able to tell me what really happened. I am dropping one of the kids I take care of at my home come summer so maybe next year I can swing it between me and my husband to pick him up from school. I hate him riding the bus and I know he does too. He used to love it when he was in preschool but of course they had monitors then and now it is total chaos. His behavior has still been bad though. This weekend he scratched his brother (pretty bad) for reasons I will never know! We have behavior therapy today so I can't wait to see how that turns out

I know it may be impossible because of your other kids - but - driving him, as suggested above, may be a good idea. My son couldn't manage the noise and activity of other kids on the school bus, it really stressed him, and he reacted with aggression.
Aggressive behavior can become a really bad habit really quickly (I know from experience )so it is a good idea, if possible, to nip it in the bud before it gets out of hand.

A couple thoughts; most bus drivers are employees of a separate bus company contracted by the school district. Though they are charged with transporting students (and some only special ed students) they aren't employees of the schools.
Back in California, we had trouble with the special ed bus drivers. The main problems were over crowding with multiple age groups. The chaos was out of this world. not only that, but a 2 mile trip would take over 45 minutes, increasing my son's school day by an hour and a half. We took him off the bus there because the management let us know they didn't care about the poor service and the teachers stated that it was the best bus staff they had seen in years.

Here in AZ, once we got him on the special ed bus, totally different. Very patient bus drivers and hardly any kids.

you need to get tough with these people and call a meeting especialy the bus driver or whoever is involved.
Then you need to agree on a plan you be in charge your his mum don't let them fob you off.
Also you need to have stricter boundrys with your child it is not acceptable to scratch and even if people annoy him.
Go at the problem head on until it is sorted out