a tale of two rooms

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"a tale of two rooms"
...last week we decided that our 17 yrs old aspie and his 13 yrs old sister switched rooms.her is bigger so, because he needs space, he walks a lot around the house,she agreed to take smaller room,he agreed to take the bigger one.but, after all the trouble, he uses every oportunitiy to go back to his old room, takes his blanket and pillow and goes to "rest for a while"...of course, that makes her very angry,she wants her privacy,she doesn´t want him to touch her things because he can be forgetful and puts them somewhere else or even breaks them.we do know that aspies do not like change of routines,but we were very thoughtful planning this on time, telling him about it, asking him, and, as i said,he agreed.now, we have very hot summer outside, and two very nervous teenagers inside.(btw, he used to swim a lot, but recently he had a little accident - threw up while swimming with neighbours - so they don´t invite him anymore,,and he doesn´t want to go swimming for now).
any opinions, advices,thoughts,anything...♥

This seems like a rare topic for this board - a problem you can get away with poking fun at! There are even ways to counteract it that your son would be amenable to. Try letting your daughter think of some goofy, harmless ways of reminding him he never left, and that his room is a zone of eminent domain, rather than leaving in place his perception that it was ever comprised of walls and doors. It's my hope that this also helps him when it comes time to find a roof of his own.

Perhaps a fuzzy or spiky door, or a photo of your daughter's window in the same place relative to your son's bed. These are the exact kind of tricks I play on myself all the time.

I know when I had to change rooms, it was awful. I worried about it for months. I cried and felt like someone had just died. That room was like a friend to me. It was like a person that I'd never get to see again. A whole portion of my life, just gone.

My mum took photos of me in the room before I left, so I felt like I could still have memories of it that I could take with me.

I think what helps is either making the new room much better than the old one, or making it a lot like the old one. Time heals too. You need time to adjust, to make friends with the new room, get used to the new feel of it etc.

I still often peep into the old room and remember my times there with it. For me, it really was like a grief process I suppose. Learning to move on. I still feel sad about it and it was decades ago!

Maybe talk to them about switching back? That could make it worse so I would talk to them both about it.

I know you think the oldest needs more room, b/c he walks around the house, but maybe he just needs more exercise outside or something. He misses his room, and his sister must be going nuts. If I was his sister I would be really, really mad, about giving up my bigger room, and then having him come wander into my now smaller room, all the time.

well, thing is, she likes better new room because it has tv,and our son doesn´t care about it at all.

I am guess that means the TV is too big to move into her old room. I guess you have to explain to her that if she wants to keep the new better but smaller room with the TV, she is going to have to be patient while your son adjusts to his new room. If they both can't deal, then they might have to move back to their original rooms. If they both theoretically prefer where they are, maybe the realization that they could be moved back will encourage more patience.

Aside, from that maybe you could put a lock on her door, like you might have on the outside of a house (But you have extra keys for it in case she loses it) then she could lock him out, even if she is not home, and then he cannot touch her stuff.

When he comes into her room, she should immediately go into his room. And touch his stuff.