Losing Words - Frustrated with Teenager

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Hi Guys, its been a while and my two are now older and in the middle of exams

AS Daughter seems to be coping well but having problems with her twin brother AS / ADD. When he gets frustrated he "loses the words" he stutters and cannot get out what he wants to say, he then becomes aggressive and goes into mood that can last for an hour! Exam stress is making this worse - it tell him to slow down, breath and focus but he now just wants to give up, not a place to be especially so close to sitting papers. Any one else have experience of this?
Many Thanks folks

You are frustrated with him? Is that what the thread title means?

He's stressed because of the pressure to succeed at the artificial educational judgement system known as school.
Tell him he is giving far too much credence to it. In the big picture, success at school is meaningless. If he realizes this, he will relax and the words will come back..

It sounds like he could be over-stressed/stimulated...as other posters suggest maybe he is putting too much importance on it or attaching it to his self worth for some reason. He probably does need to slow down, might even need to take a break here and there rather than just focusing though. Also not sure how you deal with grades...but maybe let him know he can do his best, and whatever 'score' he gets you care about him just the same...but this likely wont go over well if you're very strict about grades and lower grades=indefinate amounts of being grounded from all the things they enjoy, but hopefully that does not describe you I think that is a minority of parents but I've heard stories...and all the kids I've observed who had parents that strict did seem overly stressed/always trying to please and at the same time giving me the vibe they could fall apart at any moment. In fact in a few instances of bullying/ostracism it was a lot of times kids with that kind of pressure somewhat acting out, not that it was right but...it explains why sometimes it was the upper class kids who got good grades who did a lot of the bullying.

My sister sometimes gets like that, but not from outside expectations so much...I think she sometimes sets her own standards too high and gets too stressed out. But she more expresses that with anger/frusteration whereas I lean more towards feeling depressed and worthless but its still stress in both cases.

The reason I ask is that you mention that he gets frustrated and becomes less verbal. That sounds like a pretty high level of frustration.

If he is frustrated with his deficits and you are frustrated trying to deal with him that sounds like an emotional situation that needs calming and defusing maybe with some kind of external help or fairly strong environmental changes.

For example, stop doing homework, dim the lights, sit quietly together while listening to white noise, running water or soothing music--or in real silence, if you are lucky enough to get that where you live.

I just can't quite tell what the thread title means or if I'm reading it right.

Thanks Guys
I mean I feel helpless that I cannot help him find his words.

"For example, stop doing homework, dim the lights, sit quietly together while listening to white noise, running water or soothing music--or in real silence, if you are lucky enough to get that where you live."

Definitely going to try this next time he is becoming overwhelmed.
Thanks!