dealing with the school

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Oh, tomorrow's going to be fun.

Today my son was assaulted by a student at school. He goes to a school for kids with behavior issues, including autistic kids who have problems integrating in public schools. A kid took after him, when she was stopped by a teacher she elbowed her in the face, cornered my son, and slapped him so hard his head bounced against two walls. So this girl is due two in school suspensions, one for each person she assaulted.

Here's the problem. I've already been told the guy in charge of handing out those punishments is out today, so they'll deal with it Monday. Well, I find that unacceptable. My son is super anxious about going back to school, and I think he needs a break from this girl.

So I'm going to have to call the school to argue that they should not wait, that this girl needs to not be allowed access to my son tomorrow. But, of course, they're going to say they can't talk to me about another student. And I'm expecting them to pull some crap about how if I don't want her to have access to my son, then they'll have to take him out of the classroom. Totally utterly unfair. But you know how schools are when they follow the rules to a T.

So not looking forward to this.

Your son was assaulted. I would tell them that either they remove her from the school, or you will call the police. Personally, I would never want to call the police and I would hope that they would bend to my threat, but you should never have to remove your child from school to keep him safe.

What if you insist that she have 1:1 supervision throughout the day if she is to remain in school?

The school, btw, is stupid. Letting it go until Monday means there is 3 whole days of non-punishment following an incident. Everyone knows that the consequence is most effective when it is an immediate antecedent to the behavior. There is nothing immediate about 3 days.

I've left a message at the school for the principal to call. She's not in yet. I think this is just getting started.

I did not see where you mentioned the children's ages.

First of all the school has a legal responsibility to see to your son's safety. He can not be exposed to her until the situation has been addressed with her. It is their legal responsibility to make that happen, period.

I would approach the school first and then the girls parents, if neither step up to their responsibility, I would go to the police. You can enter it into record, then have a year to decide if you want to file a claim. I would ask the police if it is okay for you to keep your son home until Monday. The police might be able to recommend a good self-defense school. Forms of karate (not all) teach self-defense, along with self-control and self-esteem. This is very beneficial to kids on the spectrum.

The older the girl is, the more important that you contact the police if the school and her parent fail to respond.

Your son absolutely needs to know you have his back.

Keep us updated on what happens please! I am going through a similar situation with my son and a kid in his school was tripping him to the point where he has red marks on his knees, and he was teasing my son in front of other kids to the point my kid was humliated. And they said well your son handled himself very well he will not get an infraction.. Um seriously is that the only thing we are concerned about here is handing out infractions!?! What happens if this kid try's it again then what, my kids got to worry about reacting to this bully a certain way so he doesn't get in trouble? Is that not backwards? I am so nervous today because they have 6th hr together everyday. Is he going to come home again feeling that his safety is threatened, or totally embarrassed again, black eye or worse? How far does it have to go before the school actually does something. The other boy was going to be talked to and handeled today I'm told. I have no idea if that means infractions warnings or a meeting with his parents is going to happen, and I felt like they didn't want me to ask... I'm so angry and frustrated ugh.