first plane ride

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My daughter is going on a plane with us her parents, she is 17, aspergers, anxiety and some ocd. She is excited, I am surprised that she is not worried in the ways that she worries, should I just leave it deal with it, when it or should it happen? She is hyper vigilant about safety and germs. I will just leave and deal when or if she worries.

Planes are actually not that big of a deal once you get used to them. They're like giant flying cars after a few minutes.

I've been on several planes since I was a little kid, so it doesn't really phase me much when I need to board one.

My 14-year-old son has exactly the same profile and has flown many, many times. He does do some unusual things, like asking at the beginning of every flight if the plane is going to crash. We just flew two days ago, and he said that he was sure this one would crash. We obviously didn't, which we reminded him about after the fact. It's important for them to realize that their obsessions, although perhaps a little bit reality based, are highly unlikely. He also hates using the bathroom and the smells in the plane often bother him, so he pulls his t-shirt collar over his nose, but once the flight is underway, the anxiety improves. Good entertainment/distraction is a must.

He went through an excellent ERP program for his OCD, and the take-home messages were 1) do not feed the monster (point out the OCD thoughts and label them as such) and 2) exposure, exposure, exposure to the fear without your reassurance or their compulsion. Reassurance is part of the OCD cycle, and it doesn't help them at all in the long run. It's hard work, but worth it. I wouldn't talk to her at all about potential fears beforehand. Let her be excited, and it may not go beyond that at all. If it does, the anxiety should be short-lived -- it can't be longer than the length of the flight, really -- and she will benefit from learning that whatever she feared didn't happen and that she can go through the anxiety.

My 14-year-old son has exactly the same profile and has flown many, many times. He does do some unusual things, like asking at the beginning of every flight if the plane is going to crash. We just flew two days ago, and he said that he was sure this one would crash. We obviously didn't, which we reminded him about after the fact. It's important for them to realize that their obsessions, although perhaps a little bit reality based, are highly unlikely. He also hates using the bathroom and the smells in the plane often bother him, so he pulls his t-shirt collar over his nose, but once the flight is underway, the anxiety improves. Good entertainment/distraction is a must.

He went through an excellent ERP program for his OCD, and the take-home messages were 1) do not feed the monster (point out the OCD thoughts and label them as such) and 2) exposure, exposure, exposure to the fear without your reassurance or their compulsion. Reassurance is part of the OCD cycle, and it doesn't help them at all in the long run. It's hard work, but worth it. I wouldn't talk to her at all about potential fears beforehand. Let her be excited, and it may not go beyond that at all. If it does, the anxiety should be short-lived -- it can't be longer than the length of the flight, really -- and she will benefit from learning that whatever she feared didn't happen and that she can go through the anxiety.

I flew alone at 5 years old a few times and it was no big deal and I enjoyed it, like Makayla said its really like one big car in the sky. Where I see issues is the hyper vigilant security we now have post 911 in a busy airport. Armed officers and large crowds, what a perfect combination.

make sure to warn her about the ear pressure and dry air ahead of time, and give her some gum to chew on. Aside from that, assuming she's good in other public transit-like situations, or mild discomfort in general, it should be ok.

I'd suggest asking her / thinking about what makes her comfortable if she is nervous. Bring her favourite snacks, gravol if you've used it before with success, gum, a magazine or book or music. If it's a long trip a pillow and blanket might make it more "homey". If you can model calmness through the security routine, it should help. We've done lots of border crossings but not too many flights with our dd on the spectrum since 9/11... has anyone got suggestions to make about dealing with questions at security? We've always talked to all our kids about speaking politely and not making jokes, but I wonder if other guidelines are needed.
J.

I have never had any occasion to fly a plane but I would love to. I am the same profile as she is: Asperger, Anxiety and some OCD. But while I do know planes crash I am also fascinated by them (fear often leads to fascination when you get OCD traits, that's a perfect copy mechanism to deal with the anxiety).
The excitement is stronger than fear. If I have had a chance to fly one I would certainly be able to keep my anxiety on leash so it wouldn't have a chance to prevent me from the great experience. The danger is not so simple as injury (safety) or illness (germs). If the plane crashes - you are pretty much 100% dead. There is nothing to be afraid of. The slight risk of a few minutes pain is worth it compared to the curiosity.