Hi- I am new here

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I've always known something was wrong with my son. He was so socially slow. He was in normal classes in school, but had no friends and was constantly bullied. He was always only diagnosed with ADHD. I asked about aspergers a few times but was told it was just ADHD and he would catch up socially with age. I kept hoping he would, but he hasn't and there is no way he can function as an adult on his own.

He is twenty now and after finally getting a good psychiatrist AND convincing him to be more honest and open with her, he was sent for a Neuropsych evaluation. He was diagnosed with Aspergers, ADHD and MDD along with the physical issues such as spacial awareness, processing speed, motor skills, etc. They said he should have been tested a long time ago, but child psychologists just kept saying adhd.

He is on the lower side, more towards autism, but didn't have delayed speech. I got him right in with a research group who did more tests including DNA from us both and he is also going to be going to another program to help him develop skills to live a more adult life. He wants so badly to be normal and is such a nice kid, but real friendships elude him and he is easily manipulated.

I was elated by the diagnosis last week, because finally I could get him some help, finally someone listened to me. Now so many things he does makes sense both to me and to family members.

Then this week I crash emotionally. Any dreams of the future for not only him, but myself, are now going to change. Best case scenario is him someday be able to have him own place, but I will need to be close by to monitor him. He is going to need my help for the rest of his life, more then my other two children who are doing well out on their own. It's so overwhelming and so hard to talk to family and friends without sounding selfish. I'm a single parent and I was looking forward to the day I would have my own place and not be taking care of someone else and that has sort of gone out the window.

I love my son, very much and will do anything to help him live the best , happiest life he can....it's just so overwhelming.

I'm hoping I can learn from all of you how to get through this, for both he and I.

I sure hope your other children can pitch in and help you and their brother!

My other son lives quite far away now.

I am fortunate to have my best friend of a couple decade living downstairs and she has Autistic twin girls. She has a lot on her plate but has been a big help in getting him to open up to the doctors and to take the tests. I'm glad to have the diagnosis, but it's a daunting thing to think about the future for us. Hopefully I can hook up with a parents group locally. It's all just so overwhelming.

I've read through the general discussion page and I have to say that many of the people there with Aspergers don't seem all that similar to my son. He just had more in depth testing done and I am wondering if it is going to place him closer to the autistic side of the scale. I can't imagine him living alone without assistance in things like hygiene, finances, housekeeping. He has to be reminded and I have to check what he is wearing before he leaves the house, if I don't it is a disaster.

Sorry- I know I am rambling- I am just trying to absorb so much information and figure this all out in my mind.

you expressed yourself quite well is your son able to participate in wrong planet?