Your AS child and the Hell from school bullying. Yes or No?

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Thank you in advance for answering this Poll question.

I was beaten, insulted, spit on, and set on fire once all of it done in class in front of the teacher who did nothing until I fought back. When I fought back I was treated like a nazi war criminal. It was like I was expected to be victimized and they accepted it but I if defended myself verbally or physically they treated me like I was a criminal. God forbid one of their precious NT children is punished for beating on a much weaker autistic child who did nothing to provoke the attack. I can understand why some kids snap and shoot up a school.

If vile behavior from their peers is all they will learn outside of the home, the results can't be good. Yes, they're going through hell if they're getting bullied. I don't understand why someone chose the disagree option. Maybe they seriously thought one time equals the whole?

I'm guessing some answered 'disagree' bc their child is not being bullied..

I answer neither agree or disagree bc my child is not in the school system (homeschooled) but did want to see the results. I have phases of being bullied as a child and phases where things were ok. It was really difficult to get through the day when being bullied bc of the fear and anxiety.

Well, the question said "going through hell because of bullying" so I thought "ok, are they going through hell because of bullying? Well of course they would be."
Thanks for explaining another perspective.

Someone on another thread said that it is impossible for an AS child to make it through school without being bullied.
I wanted to see how many parents on this forum have/had children who went through Hell in school because of bullying and to what extent.

I am not trying to debate whether a child is right to feel like he is in He** because of bullying. Yes, of course he would.

I am simply trying to find out about parents' experiences here. Thanks again.

I can't respond to this poll because I don't believe my daughter is going through "HELL" being bullied. However, she is ignored by her peers (which she doesn't mind-she prefers to disappear from notice) and we have had some instances of a peer that was aggressive with my daughter (touching her against her will) and also taunting her (in a childlike way when she discerned that my daughter would respond dramatically) but these instances were nipped when we had a conference with the other girl's parents, explained about AS, and respectfully asked that the aggressive girl be kept away from my daughter.

Now, my daughter DOES go through HELL at school due to her social anxiety, but that is not due to bullying and is another matter altogether.

My boys will be going into grade 6 in the fall. So far they haven't experienced bullying. I am defining bullying as habitual abuse or exclusion by someone that has more power (social, physical, emotional) than the victim in that environment. They are by no means "popular" and have experienced isolated incidents of meanness or exclusion, but no more than any average kid will encounter. The school that my sons attend works really hard to stamp out any hint of bullying, and to actively teach inclusion and celebrate differences.

This may change as my sons get older. They are just now on the cusp of the really challenging age social skills-wise. If they ever were experiencing "hell" at school because of bullying, we wouldn't hesitate to home school or give them a fresh start at a different school, if the situation couldn't be quickly and definitively remedied.

I think my son has had, overall, very little bullying, and the reasons for that are many. Is his life at school perfectly happy? NO, but, then again, it isn't for my NT daughter, either. Childhood can be tough on all kids, and you can't expect to shield your children from it. You can expect to keep it in it's place, as something you deal with but aren't devastated by.

In the right environment, bullying does not have to happen. I have been lucky that my son is in a good environment. We've stayed out of the big image "excellence" system in favor of an interesting, ethnically, and economically diverse district with teachers used to a "whole child" approach, and where acceptance of differences is practically a religion. And my kid's test scores could not be better, so all the snots who thought the education could not possibly be as good are wrong.

I also was very proactive in getting involved at the school, and joining carpools, etc. All of that increases the circle of people who know and care about my child, and offers a strong disincentive to kids who want to bully. We've talked about this in other threads, so I'll skip the details here.

The choices YOU make can have a profound effect on how much your child will go through. Consider them carefully.

My son complains of been bullied in primary and he has just begun post primary. When I try to find out he is unable to tell me, or he choses not to. But he will keep saying that he is been bullied and no more.

my autie is entering kindergarten and hasnt been exposed to bullying. in fact, the teachers and other kids all adore him. he has some aura of innocence that draws other people, much to his dismay.

my aspie is going into 9th, and if you asked him, he will tell you he is tortured at school by other kids. some is true, some isnt. some has been bullying, some has been just "normal" mean kid behavior, and some is him misinterpreting things. some things have even been started by him, usually because of overreactions to sudden sensory input, such as being bumped or startled and he has a verbal outburst or physically strikes out. he is our drama queen, he is such a ham that his concentration at his gifted school is theater, so everything he describes requires a lot of probing questions and trying to determine what the actual truth is. its hard to tell most of the time.

most kids get bullied at some point. that doesnt make it acceptable, but we should acknowledge that its not simply an autistic experience. autistics can stand out more than most NTs tho, which makes them easy targets to spot. their lack of social groups also tends to make it easier to pick on them. i dont think there is any way to completely prevent it from happening if your child spends time outside the home. kids can even be bullied at mcd's playland or the local park.

Also, in the early grades I think the teacher has as much to do with the bullying atmosphere as the kids. My daughter's first teacher (in pubic school) was an older woman with 20+ years of experience but she believed that kids should be typical and a little flack from the other students was "healthy" to get my daughter to "act right". She chastised my daughter for chewing on things, saying "babies chew on things" and would take away her chewy necklace, saying it was "unsanitary". This was before I understood the laws and felt helpless to defeat this woman's agenda. This gave the other kids a "green light" to chide my daughter (although they were very young and basically accepting of her differences as younger kids are). We left public school shortly after that experience. Since then, my daughter has had wonderful teachers who appreciate her and try very hard to understand her. Their appreciation seems to "guide" the students' opinions. But we are still in low grades (she's entering 3rd). So, I would say getting the right teacher is VERY imprtant. Now some of my daughter's peers will help her and I have on many occasions witnessed the other kids encouraging my daughter when she was having a down day-saying things like "It's going to be ok" not in a condescending way but nicely. But we are in a nice private school with parents deeply involved in their children's upbringing and misbehavior (bullying) is strictly not tolerated by the headmistress.

I was beat up, sexually harassed, kicked in the head repeatedly (when I have a sezuire disorder) and constantly insulted and tortured in high school. I did not want to tell my mom cause if I told then I would be a narc and then get further abused. The only way I found to protect myself was to always have a boyfriend that was a bit of a bad@ss. I learned that sex provided protection and frienship.

As I got older, the bad boys were more of a problem than a solution, so I changed my taste...now I am asexual.

My mom never knew that I was being bullied like that until she saw one of the boys beating me up on the school bus while the busdriver did nothing but smirk. Mom came out like a mama grisly and was about to jump on that bus when the bus driver kicked me out the door and drove off. I did try to tell my mom that the busdriver was a black racist, but my dad convinced her that I was nuts until that happened.

My mom tried to file charges on the two boys for the fact they were kicking me in the head when I have a seizure disorder, but I convinced her not to as that would only make matters worse.
I never told her about them sexual harrassing me and the attempted rape that was interviened by a teacher.

I wish I was homeschooled.