Invited to NT child's birthday party.

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Hi,

It is something really lovely thing and when I found out that my son has been invited to his classmate's birthday party, I was happy jumping up and down but same time I am very nervous..

My son goes to pre year1 (we call it prep here in Australia) class, He is doing just OK socially (not hated by other children. he is likeable so his classmates seem to like him but not forming friendship like other children. I see him stimming a lot (number stimming by air-drawing) and once a week small meltdown at school. I am not actively telling people about my son's autism. At this point, no parents and no children knows about his autism (probably..).

May I ask your advice? what do you do before attending birthday party and what are you careful about being in birthday party..

It is impossible not to tell people about his autism throughout his primary school time. even if people know about his autism, I want him to be socially acceptable as possible. (at least in the birthday party..)

Thank you in Advance.

It is good to let your son know what to expect, which is probably lots of over-excited children running around and making a lot of noise. You may be able to find out more by asking the host.

At this age it should be OK for you to stay at the party with your son, and that will probably be your number 1 defense for making sure he can handle the situation.

If he's OK at school without you, there's no reason he shouldn't be OK at the party, especially if you're there. He was invited, so I assume these are kids he knows. Relax.

Thank you for advise and encouragement from both of you. It helped to get my son prepared for the birthday beforehand.

I just want to let you know that we did not have any issues (meltdowns or crying) during the birthday party and my son enjoyed it and so the birthday boy too.

I don't know we were just lucky or we expect some problems next time if we ever have next time. My son has come long way, When he was 3, I never thought he will ever go to mainstream school and even if he does, never expected to be invited to classmates birthday party... So it was quite achievement for both myself and my son. All new experiences, new world ahead.

I am glad to hear it went well!

Chances are he'll do fine, since they're young kids any kind of autistic outburst will be seen as kids being kids, and he's young and thus forgetful so he'll get through it. To be honest, at that age you're the one that's going to be under pressure at the party, not him, since it's a highly social environment where all the parents in attendance will be competing with each other over their children's accomplishments.