fussy eater. Suggestions anyone?

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My 10yr old son is extremely fussy about food. Everyone said he'd grow out of it by the time he was 7, but now he's 10 and has become even more limited in what he will eat. He would rather go hungry (and often does) than eat something he doesn't like/hasn't tried. Anyone else have similar issues? What would you do?

I was like this as a child - in fact I still am!

What might help is to try and figure out what specifically he doesn't like. For me, it is certain textres. I don't like things that are mushy or gritty or lumpy. There are also certain smells that I don't like (and I have a very sensitive sense of smell)

My mother just force fed me things which I hated and which often made me be physically sick and also meant that when I left home at 17 I only ate about 3 things as she had taught me to dread food and mealtimes.

So what I try to do is find equivlants to things that I can't deal with. I will give some examples - I hope this is of use to you:

Mashed potato and boiled potato- don't like texture so have potatoes cooked in other ways - roasted, for example or baked (although it has to be baked thoroughly as I don't like there to be a hard unproperly cooked bit in the middle)

Pulses - don't like texture and also these upset my stomach - I try to make up for this by eating other healthy foods to compensate- for example, I really like steamed broccoli!

Juice with bits in it - I can't stand bits in either juice or yoghurt - so I only get 'smooth' juices. I don't really eat yoghurt because it can upset my stomach - but very occasionally I will have ones that don't have 'bits' in or I will have fromage frais (again, no bits!)

Meat - the smell and the fact that it is a dead animal disgust me - so I have equivalents like Quorn and textured vegetable protein.

Bread - there are lots if different breads available if you go to a proper bakery. I now have freshly baked gluten free bread - it is so much nicer as gluten bread just feels like someone has dumped a brick in my stomach and makes me really tired.

Well you get the idea. I hope this helps.
Is it worth getting your son tested for food allergies? I only found out that I had problems with gluten a few months ago. Since giving up gluten have felt a lot healthier and it has increased the variety of what I eat because now that I have gluten free versions of food, I don't get unwell after eating, so no longer have a negative association with food.

I'll second the thing about textures -- with me, the big issue is (and has always been) vegetables: They come with many different flavors, but I've never liked their texture. A noticeable exception is potatoes, especially mashed. Another is tomatoes: I find the "watery" part in their center downright gross -- but turn them into tomato soup, tomato ketchup, tomato whatever, and I actually like the taste of tomato. If your son has a similar issue, the key might be to "do something" about the "offending" food items that makes them less repulsive (e.g. mashing or pulping, "strategic" spicing to cancel out "bad" tastes etc.).

I've heard about other aspies having some strange, yet very simple and stringent "rules" about food; one example given was refusing to eat anything orange -- carrot, sweets, whatever; the color was the sole rule...!

As I read your post, it comes through that he will not try new things. If you're not already doing so, it may be a good idea to "break the news" to him about a new and untried dish well in advance, e.g. when reading an interesting new recipe or planning next week's dinners: "On tuesday, we're having something new and interesting for dinner: It's ... ", and proceed to describe what's in it. Getting upset over sudden changes in schedules, expectations etc. is a classic trait on the autism spectrum, and it just might be the key to introducing new and potentially tasty experiences to him...

I would suggest that the supper table is not a good place to do battle. It should be a pleasent experience. The battles that my son and I fought left some mental scars.

I suggest that

o Everyone eats at the same table at supper time 99% of the time
o Sometimes it is ok to eat watching TV.
o The child is required to try everything
o The child serves his own portions, and eats what he serves.
o Healthy snacks (fruit and veggies) are available off hours.
o Everyone helps clean up after supper. (Aspies are likely to do better with a specific list of things to do). My son is responsible for clearing the table, unloading dishwasher, watching the table, and putting the chairs in.

The other not so obvious one is that they should help cook.
Things taste better, and look less gross, when you help make them.
Peeling carrots, and potatos is a reasonable skill.
Stiring tomato soup is reasonable.
My son gets cooking stuff out, and reads ingredients, to make sure the recipe is followed correctly.


We are making slow positive strides.

I had/still have issues with food textures & smells. Funny thing is a number of the foods I find repulsive in taste and smell have turned out to be things I am allergic to. Recently my dr told me I was highly allergic to mustard seed and I told him that's okay because the smell is so repulsive I can't stand to even have someone eating it sitting next to me. Also didn't like foods touching. My mom used to say "they all touch once they go in your stomach" but still that doesn't matter to me. At Walmart they have plastic compartmentalized food trays for 84 cents a piece in the summer picnic aisle, so buy some of those for your kid if they have food touching issues.

Something I like to point out to parents is REMEMBER many auties and aspies have IBS-irritable bowel syndrome (along with food allergies) so if some things they refuse to eat there may be a darn good reason for it. When they refuse that vegetable or fruit are they being nitpicky or have they eaten it before and it caused them terrible stomach pains? Sometimes your kids cannot articulate that something makes their stomach hurt. We sometimes have trouble explaining personal things like I couldn't explain at the emergency room that my leg hurt or that I fell on it so I walked on a broken leg for 4 weeks. But back to the food thing- for me I have tested postive to allergies for almost every fruit and vegetable and the ones I'm not allergic to cause IBS symptoms. If I even eat something as harmless looking as lettuce or cabbage in egg rolls, or onion, garlic or oatmeal it causes my stomach to hurt for 3-4 days afterwards. So I have a feeling some of these AS kids that their parents call nitpicky are just unable to tell you some of what you call healthy makes their stomach hurt or makes them itch or something.

I had some success with my fussy son by getting him to help me cook. I found that he was more willing to try something that he made. He didn't always like the food, but at least he felt he had some control over what he was eating...........how about having him help you come up with a menu that is acceptable to you both ?....

We keep a big bag of chicken nuggets in our freezer-my son has to take one bite of everything put on his plate (luckily we have very similar issues with foods, so it's normally things he likes), and if he doesn't like it, he makes hisself a plate of chicken nuggets. Maybe not the best approach, but this is coming from a mom who ate nothing but grilled cheese and chef boyardee ravioli every single day when she was growing up

once or twice a week, I let my son pick what he wants for dinner and I stick to it, but he has to at least try what I have fixed on the other days. If something really repulses him I don't force it, I have learned that hard way numerous times that it will only make him throw up anyway. He may pick blueberry muffins (only kind he eats) and I figure that is better than him going hungry and being grouchy.

Thanks everybody!
I don't force him and I have tried introducing small amounts of new foods with some success but progress is slow........
It's still mainly noodles and pasta shapes!

hey, any progress is good !

I do have a secret for when I fix some stuff, I don't do it so much now because he does eat a little better, but I would sneak baby food into some things he would eat like mac and cheese and spaghetti for nutritional purposes, he never knew and ate it right up. I never added enough to alter the taste particularly, it works great in hamburgers

give vitamins too