Advice please..

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O.K. here goes... I'm not sure if this fits in any where but am hoping someone may be able to offer some insight. I have always been told that my 8yr old son should be in acting school because he is so dramatic. I am now discovering he is very sensory orrientated eg from the youngest age he would gaze into ppl's eyes, stroke their hair and say the oddests things ie your eyes are so beautiful. The smallest bump would have him making crying noises like a baby or screaming his head off (not always getting tears). He will tell me sometimes (mostly when we are out this will happen) he feels sick or dizzy and then very dramatically start to swoon ( I cant spell sorry) and start falling to the floor. He tells me sometimes his heart is beeping or he cant breath. He obssess's over small things and big things. I avoid the news because of this. eg a few years back the whole state were having power over load issues we were all being asked to try to conserve power, he went around switching absultly everything off and worrying each time we used anything. Sorry if I'm all over the place, but you guys seem to know so much and I haven't had an oppertunity as yet to ask the docs all of this. The dramatics have always been there I dont know if Im explaining them well, but I do get sick of ppl telling me it is all just attention seeking. Can a person attention seek for 8yrs straight? He is so eager to please and usually such a happy boy, but the dramatics and worries are there even when I tell him he is making me cross, he cant seem to help it. I've only said it's making me cross a few times to see if this stopped the behaviours. Any way I hope someone can tell me if this is normal as/autistic behaviour or if maybe it is something else. I have lots more questions but for now this will do. Thanking you all in advance.

My son is melodramatic and it has driven others to suggest he's not autistic. I think it's part of his personality and lack of connection he has with things.

I'm no expert, just a Aspie's mom who has read a lot of books and research, and lived with an Aspie son for 24 years- I don't think "drama" fits the Aspie profile very well. Most Aspies try very hard not to draw attention to themselves. They typically don't go out of their way to touch others; I can't imagine my son stroking anybody's hair.

Perhaps a professional might be able to help with your child.

Best wishes to you.

yeah i'm 27 and a aspie, i hate social situations and usually would try to avoid any confrontation. and not draw any attention. i for one wouldnt stroke anyones hair.

He sounds a lot like me at that age. Sometimes I wanted attention and sometimes I was just having a good time. I think my emotional maturity was delayed a LOT. Although I didn't stare into someone's eyes and stroke their hair, it is possible to have this from extreme anxiety or other associated conditions.

Sounds strange for an aspie with the stroking hair thing. All I can say is I am a sensitive person and recently my life has been something of a drama. And in a weird way I liked it that way. But that is as a teenager.
As for the beautiful eyes thing, I did that once somewhere in elementary school.
I had huge emotional reactions when I was younger.

I just know that both of my boys seemed to lean a bit toward hypochondria. It's sad for them that they were born into a family where the parents are the complete opposite side of hypochondria -- as parents, the both of us are not inclined to get sick or complain about aches and pains.

The oldest son is now 21, and has gotten way over the hypochondria issue -- now, he's the opposite, he's telling buddies who lean this way to "just get over it!"

The 11 year old is still inclined to do as your son does, make a big deal over any sicknesses or illnesses. I just think that these kids sometimes lack the skill to know what's real and what's not, or maybe a better way to put this is that they lack the ability to understand the DEGREE of an illness, i.e. if they have a 101 fever, they think they're gonna die. No, 101 isn't a bad fever, but 105 is kinda scary. So I guess it's our job, over and over, to teach them the qualifiers . . . yes, if you throw up, you're sick, but you'll be better in a day or two. Yes, if you have a fever you shouldn't go to school, but if you're just sneezing, you're fine to go to school. Stuff like that.

If it helps at all, I think my sons were at their worst when they were ages 8 to 10 years. Then, they started to gain some perspective, and also realized that their peers were not impressed when they went on and on about being sick. My 11 year old just spent this entire week being sick, and in some ways, he has swung the pendulum the opposite way -- he was so cheerful, we really didn't realize he had a 102 fever! He's figured out how that feels now, and very matter-of-factly tells the school nurse that he has a fever, and should probably go home.

Kris

I don't think it is strange or non-Aspie-ish for him to want to stroke hair, he is probably sensory seeking and just likes to feel that kind of texture, it probably gives him comfort.

My son is very dramatic (he's 10) and I have only now gotten to the point where I think I know whether he truly is in horrible pain or if it's just a stomach ache that would be relieved by going to the bathroom! He is very healthy but seems to experience the normal stomach ache, sore throat, small cut or bruise at a more intense level than others. He does have sensory issues so this makes sense to me. The dramatics have lessened greatly as he aged - there are much fewer tears! YEA!

When he feels sick or something we always ask the question "what level is it? (On a scale of 1 to 10) This gives me a good idea whether he really needs medical help or just some time to let whatever is ailing him pass.

I agree with the hair stroking thing - my son hasn't touched hair but every once in awhile wherever we are I see him go toward an object or texture or something and it's like he HAS to touch it. We are always working on what is OK to touch and what is not OK. I don't think your son is seeking attention I think he probably could be taught when it's OK to touch something and when it's not.

Good Luck

Thanks guys. I am sooooo silly I'm thinking out loud now. Perhaps, correct me if Im wrong but maybe part of the drama with everything is not only when he is sick he is either dying, or bouncing off walls ( I have to say docs are still desciding if he has the original diagnoses aswell which is adhd) but could it also be because most of his ideas seem pretty much black and white. Im not explaing very well sorry.Umm example...he doesnt seem to understand that people can still like you but just not like something you said or did he thinks if people are upset they hate him and its the end of the world. Or if people are nice and say hello they really really like him, not just that they are being polite. If he sees someone doing something that he thinks is wrong its the end of the world. Im a smoker and we were recently at an animal farm I went outside of the cafe there to have a smoke and I left him in the cafe with my sister, he had a melt down and turned on the dramatics he was firmly convinced I was going to kill the animals or at the very least make them sick with my smoke. I was a long long way away from the animals. Other people dont understand and give him funny looks when he does his dramatics. Is this all normal for as? thanks again.

Hmmm, my son is very dramatic when he is upset about something. If the shorts he likes are not clean, he has this way of falling to the ground. It's actually sort of funny, despite being very aggravating because he's taking so much time to get ready for school. If someone bumps him, he acts like he's been seriously injured. I think it's his sensory issues and he truly perceives these things as being very serious or painful. I used to call him "mister drama" but these things are very real to him and he's really not acting. He has issues with personal boundaries and he invades other kids space at times. Not sure if that is typical for Aspergers. Does anyone know? He's not been diagnosed with Aspergers though, but PDD-NOS.

Doby
You described the type of stuff Im talking about. Getting in peoples faces is a big issue with us. Some of the dramatics are funny other times its frustrating. we have to watch what we say or we make it worse. Our diagnoses isnt confirmed yet, but I was told the doc's are leaning towards aspergers, but they wont confirm until all the screening has been done.

My son is very dramatic when he doesn't get his way right away. He'll start crying like a baby does, "waaaah!", he's 11, and he'll say, "I can't breath, I can't breath" and he's obviously breathing.