Second Life virtual world....addiction and/or obsession

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Does anyone have experience with their teen becoming addicted or obsessed with Second Life?

I'm going to sound like a nasty parent but I don't allow them to go there. I'm sure it is fine for adults but I have experienced one of my kids becoming obsessed with a role-playing game and I don't want to go there again. It wasn't pleasant and I had to be far tougher than I ever wanted to be with my kids.

Yes.......I absolutely agree. I had to become extremely tough and it was not pleasant and still is not. I banned my teen from this site and others and the internet in general. It is going on 6 months and the few times I let my teen on (with supervision) I can see the anxiety reappear and the meltdowns and "how I am ruining their life", so on and so on. I try to replace this virtual world with real life situations....but the attraction to this world is so strong. I had to be tougher than I ever was and my teen ADMITTED to being addicted to it. Yet the pull is so strong (at least for my asperger's teen) because they can be anyone they want. Just wondering who else has dealt with this situation. My teen was blurring the lines between this virtual world and the real world.

Adults are addicted to Second Life as well. I heard stories of Second Life ruining families and causing divorces. I just fear that it will never go away as my teen turns into an adult.

I dont know what this second life thingy is, but from what is being said, I am guessing it is a virtual reality game or website.
While I have never actually seen this site or known anyone who uses it, I personally dont see anything wrong with it.
To the parents of these teens who are 'adicted' to it: are you an aspie yourself or are you merely the parent of one? If you are an aspie yourself, you would understand the lure of it and why it could be a sanity saver. If you are the parent of an aspie please pay close attention to what I am going to say next.
Aspies are often so misunderstood, used and abused by reality and the real world. We quite often are never allowed to experience it as a participant, usually only an observer. When offered an opportunity to exerience a virtual reality, it is an opportunity to become part of something and to belong to something. Virtual reality allows us to customise the environment to accept us.
Many aspies rapidly get burned out or have breakdowns because of the way the real world treats us. The chance to experience a virtual reality is like being able to take a holiday from a really crappy job. It can often save our sanity and allow us to put up with things for a little while longer.

If someone is going to become adicted to this, they are an adictive personality. Get them away from one thing and they will just as easily latch onto another. If you can offer them a better life than the one they have in second life, great. If not, leave them alone.

Second Life is a virtural world or 3D chat room. Like any other online chat room or website, people "can" role play but it's not a game, persay.

I AM the parent of an aspie.....addicted to Second Life.....that has now intruded into my teen's real world. I understand that sometimes people on the spectrum cannot deal in the real world...but SL is dangerous. I rather my teen find something else to focus on.....and we are working on that while banning SL. Second Life is not better. It is far worse than people can imagine.

I don't think you're understanding, there is no way your child can focus on something else, take it away and it's like your child is now in prison.

Second Life is just a program, a mixture of a Chat Room, Computer Game, and even a job (Some people make set up businesses in there). You can't just take it away and expect things to eventually turn out right. I would in fact encourage it because for one it's interaction, and using programs like MSN helped me become better able to deal with social interaction and it helped with my spelling, grammar and typing skills. Also it will help your Teen "get it out of their system", taking it away is just putting it off until a later date.

Maybe you're just looking for people to agree with you, whatever, it's your child's life.

There other alternatives though, like IMVU, I used to use that program myself.

I have been on there, I could never really get into it myself, I've not had the greatest experiences on there... had some really strange people come up to me wanting cybersex and other things including a character following me around naked complete with male parts. I'm not very inclined to ever let my sons when they are older to go there...

Oh I realize....I am NOT looking for someone to agree with me. I don't need an agreement to know what is going on in my child's real life. Second Life was/is ruining my child's life. For some, it may be OK. For mine, it overtook everything.....school, family, friends, sleep, hygeine....and caused anxiety, depression, sadness. If you are not there...you may not understand.

People who are not who they say they are have been contacting my teen in real life. It is addictive and obsessive. It is frightening. There ARE other ways to deal with typing, social interaction, etc. Real life social skills groups, acting groups, writing clubs, etc. Yes, it is not easy. It is hard work to find other suitable outlets and activities for teens on the spectrum.

People may not like to hear this........but, I have noticed that people who strongly defend SL are either NOT addicted and cannot comprehend how people can be (those who can turn it off when they need to do something....like school work, sleep or take a shower).....or those who ARE addicted and don't think they are or don't want to admit it.

I am just looking for people who have overcame this with their child.....that is all. I am not into debates about the validity of SL. It is what it is and I know what it has done to my child's life. I have to do what is necessary to help my child.....whether people agree of not. I am making sure my child is NOT in "prison".

To MishLuvsHer2Boys
Yes......Absolutely.....keep your sons away!! ! It is terrible.

Please, lots of Aspies lose sleep and neglect hygine because of their obsessions, I do and my mum constantly complains and threatens me with Blackmail too, and I don't appreciate it.

Then stop letting reveal so much information about himself. I've used similar programs as I said, do I need to say anything further? I've encounted the same problems your child has.

And I'm saying I'm a teen who has been there himself, I know from experience. Does your child want to be involved in that? I know if it were me I wouldn't, and you couldn't get me to go if you payed me.

Your child will become "addicted" to a variety of things, it isn't your job to manage it. It's just a normal Aspie thing.

Anyway I've already suggested IMVU and other similar places.

To Deus_ex_machina...
I do appreciate your input....but I was really trying to get some info from parents, that is way I posted int eh parents' discussion.

Other than asking for parents who had addicted kids, what was your question? I didn't see where you were asking for information.

You wanted help and I gave it, considering your situation shouldn't you take it where you can get it?

I DO appreciate your help. Thank you.

I am having a bit of trouble figuring out exactly what the problems are that searching4info's son is having, and what searching4info is looking for.

The internet as a whole is ubiquitous these days - so much of school and work and life in general is dependent upon it, that there is no practical way to ban someone from using it without causing serious consequences. If he is having a problem with internet usage, he will need to learn proper guidelines for things like providing contact information. These are essential skills in today's world, no different than driving or cooking.

As for the Second Life issue, specifically, Second Life is not a game like World of Warcraft or Everquest where the developers provide content. Rather, it is a virtual world, where other members create the content, often with 'real life' counterparts. For example, there are concerts or lectures which take place simultaneously in real life and Second Life, and many companies have virtual storefronts in Second Life. To say that Second Life is 'intruding' on real life is missing the point of Second Life: Second Life is not an escape from the real world, it is an augmentation and refactoring of the real world in a digital medium. There is nothing to intrude - Second Life is part of real life and vice versa.

To me it sounds like Second Life is offering your son the sorts of social opportunities he doesn't get in the real world. While there may be a need to put some limits on these activities, I cannot see how prohibiting them would be helpful. Rather, you need to work with your son to help him learn how to use these technologies else he will be in for a huge amount of trouble in college and later in life. What will he do in college with a computer, broadband connection and no supervision? Will you have given him the tools to function in such an environment?