Is this a meltdown?

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When I went to pick J up yesterday from school, I didn't go imediatly into the yard, I waited a fewminutes so I could observe him without being seen. Whn I got to the yard he was sitting in the middle of the play equipment with his bag on his back, head down picking at or playing with his trousers leg ( he hadn't seen me). I stood there for a little while just watching. He obviously wasn't happy all the other kids were playing with each other and just steping around him. J got up mumbling to himself very agitated look on his face and moved to the monkey bars were he started to do or attempt to do chin ups. I called out to him a few times before he walked towards me threw his bag down then took off to the other side of the yard. When I walked over to collect him and find out what was wrong he gave me a filthy look, I tried to touch him he hit me. All the time mumbling under his breath very angry look on his face etc. This went on for about 15-20 minutes till I could get him in the car. He was still like this at home for a further hour. He didnt want to talk, didn't want to be talked to, didnt want to be touched. He was very red in the face and hot.
J is normally very chatty (to chatty) very touchy feely (major sensory issues) he is devastated if he thinks he has upset someone. Yesterday he was the complete opposite. This is happening more and more often lately. Is this what you guys call a meltdown?

sounds about right..........how distressing for you both. Your heart must ache for J. I have AS and I have a little J too (Joseph) when I pick him up from school my heart melts, and I don't know yet to what extent he is in the spectrum.

Your both in my thoughts.

It sounds like its the aftermath of a type of meltdown.
What untill he is calm before broching the subject as to the cause and work out how you can help him from the information you get.
Even though this is a meltdown you need to let him know that hitting you is wrong and has consequences.
I feel for him and for you. This is going to be an ongoing struggle but keep working on it.

Thank you both Kriss and militarybrat. Its such a relief to find people that understand and dont just tell me that J needs to get over it. He would if he could.

Yes, that's a meltdown all right. Ah, probably more of a "shutdown". I get them too. If pushed to talk or told to get over it, I then go into full meltdown mode. Thankfully, it doesn't happen much now and rarely did at school. I internalised upset and rage for many years and then it began blowing out when I had to leave home permanently. There is still a lot there just under the surface.

It is a very distressing situation - the poor kid! He's probably upset because the kids leave him out, plus he might have been told off by the teacher during the day.

more like shutdown than meltdown.......son does this still. will completely shut down~ become hunched over, sullen, rock back and forth, fists clenched, sometimes cry......usually does this when can't handle frustration & blames situation on himself......not a fun place to be at all.
don't try touching him when he's in this phase~ found out the hard way that even though son appeared coherent, he really wasn't . he would just be ruminating over and over in his head & lash out at the nearest person for whatever he was upset about. best to let him ruminate. keep an eye on him...sometimes escalates into full blown meltdowns~ rage, throwing things, hitting etc.
best of luck

My sons used to do this (before psychology and IEP). It was horrible for them and me.

They used to go home and hide in a cupboard for a long time.

I believe you are frustrated while waiting for his diagnosis + school hasn't been helpful.

He is obviously very stressed at school.

Things will improve when he gets therapy + IEP.

When I read your posts I know what you're going through: this was my life 6 months ago.

Now my sons and family are doing well.

Helen