school social skills group

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Hi everyone,

My AS son is 6 yrs. old and attends public school in a regular 1st grade classroom. He was just given an IEP which includes OT, music lessons and social skills group with a school counselor. We have him seeing a speech therapist outside of school once a week to work on the social issues one on one. He is doing very well academically and loves school. We are very happy with how accommodating our school system has been thus far. That being said, we are questioning the school counselor's approach pertaining to the social group. Our son sees her for a 1/2 an hour once a week. The group consists of 4 boys with different problems, none of which have Asperger's. 3 are older than our son and 1 is, I guess, the same age. She did mention that there were some aggression problems with at least one student. These boys that are attending this group are not in mainstream classrooms. We have not had a chance to sit down with this counselor. We were hoping to get more information at his IEP meeting which was Friday. She attended this meeting gave us a synopsis of what she was doing, I asked a question on a topic she focused on (name calling) during the group and told her that our son came home and was wondering why they talked about that because no one calls him names. She replied to me that he should know that information should the situation arise. She then had to leave due to having other students scheduled during that time. She seemed put off that I questioned her at all. She does not have experience with Aspergers.

As parents of children with Asperger's what would you do in this situation? I am not feeling like I want this counselor to play such an important part in my sons life. She has a very strong personality was a former gym teacher before getting into counseling. Our son is bright and happy but submissive he is not agressive at all. He likes going to this group but I am wondering whether it is a good idea in the end.

Considering that on a general basis name calling typically begins the end of first grade year for arguments, and on a daily basis in third grade, I'd be glad that my son was getting the chance to learn about this now, rather than waiting till then. After all, as an aspie, its bound to happen to him and if it hasn't been discussed previously he'll probably be quite confused as to why he's being called names.

Though I'm really confused about your needing to attend an IEP meeting to get more information. In every school I've been in, and for the mock IEP I had to write, the parents were the most important key players, followed by therapists, then teachers. You should have helped set your son's IEP goals, and the steps taken to reach the goals - that's your right, by law.

Hi Triangular_Trees,

Thank you for your reply! Yes, I am glad that our son is being exposed to subjects such as name calling, but I was questioning the approach the counselor used.

Also, we were very involved in forming the IEP. We did not get to meet the person that would oversee the Social Group until we put the IEP in writing on Friday. Our son has seen this counselor 5 times prior to the meeting. I guess my question is do parents have a choice in WHO administers therapies for their child? If you as a parent do not feel comfortable with the person's knowledge or approach can you request a change in personnel? Thanks again.

We finished up elementary school last year, but social skills is still a apart of my son's curriculum in middle school.

In our situation, social skills was something worked on by the speech teacher, who was VERY well versed in Asperger's, so much so that I think she was the biggest reason why our son wasn't put into our school's satellite (all autism, all the time) program early on (it's always makes me shudder to think that the school personnel was even thinking along the lines for a minute, because it was a totally inappropriate setting for him). Our son was mainstreamed from first grade on, and the speech teacher worked on social and pragmatic language skills, to help him specifically in the areas that kids with asperger's have difficulty in (conversation). In second grade, he was allowed to invite other kids from class to come to the speech room to play, and she observed this setting so that she could help him know what he should and shouldn't be doing in a play situation. In the third or fourth grade, he would ask kids to come to the speech room for lunch, and they would eat lunch with the speech teacher, and she would observe him in a conversational setting. All was done with MAINSTREAM kids, so that he could see what he was SUPPOSED to do.

That's the only thing that bothers me about your situation -- it's great that your school offers this social skills class, but I think you are in line to wonder how much experience this person has with your son's diagnosis, and I also sort of question that he is with other kids that have different problems. In our middle school setting, I think our son is having social skills work with other boys with asperger's, AND they have a social club that meets twice a month with MAINSTREAM kids as well as asperger's kids, and everybody has fun with that.

I think that, separate from an IEP meeting, you should have a talk with the principal and ask what kind of training the school counselor has. You may not be able to do anything about it, but you also may be able to lay the groundwork for the fact that you're keeping a close eye on this, and if it's not beneficial, you're pulling your son out. Also, you could do research on available conferences in your area FOR TEACHERS and COUNSELORS, and you might be able to talk your school into sending this counselor to training specifically on autism. That might be the best approach.

Kris

We finished up elementary school last year, but social skills is still a apart of my son's curriculum in middle school.

In our situation, social skills was something worked on by the speech teacher, who was VERY well versed in Asperger's, so much so that I think she was the biggest reason why our son wasn't put into our school's satellite (all autism, all the time) program early on (it always makes me shudder to think that the school personnel was even thinking along those lines for a minute, because it was a totally inappropriate setting for him). Our son was mainstreamed from first grade on, and the speech teacher worked on social and pragmatic language skills, to help him specifically in the areas that kids with asperger's have difficulty in (conversation). In second grade, he was allowed to invite other kids from class to come to the speech room to play, and she observed this setting so that she could help him know what he should and shouldn't be doing in a play situation. In the third or fourth grade, he would ask kids to come to the speech room for lunch, and they would eat lunch with the speech teacher, and she would observe him in a conversational setting. All was done with MAINSTREAM kids, so that he could see what he was SUPPOSED to do.

That's the only thing that bothers me about your situation -- it's great that your school offers this social skills class, but I think you are in line to wonder how much experience this person has with your son's diagnosis, and I also sort of question that he is with other kids that have different problems. In our middle school setting, I think our son is having social skills work with other boys with asperger's, AND they have a social club that meets twice a month with MAINSTREAM kids as well as asperger's kids, and everybody has fun with that.

I think that, separate from an IEP meeting, you should have a talk with the principal and ask what kind of training the school counselor has. You may not be able to do anything about it, but you also may be able to lay the groundwork for the fact that you're keeping a close eye on this, and if it's not beneficial, you're pulling your son out. Also, you could do research on available conferences in your area FOR TEACHERS and COUNSELORS, and you might be able to talk your school into sending this counselor to training specifically on autism. That might be the best approach.

Kris

my daughter works on social skills weekly with the school social worker~ was supposed to be a group, but evidently the school "couldn't find" any other kids who needed social skills
now daughter goes to a private group outside of school that has 4 other girls in it. so far things seem to be going well with the group
as far as i know, you don't have much choice as to who runs the school social skills group. you could definitely check to make sure that all language used in the group is concrete~ if the other boys in the group have ADHD, then it's most likely that she is already using concrete examples

Thanks for the comments Schleppenheimer and Ster. I know the children that are in my sons social group are in spec. ed classes with different Dxs (no dx of AS) to which I am not privy to. The counselor does not bring in NT children to interact with the group nor does she observe my son outside of the group. I have scheduled a meeting with her since my last post to discuss the group more and whether she is meeting my sons needs properly. Schleppenheimer, you lucked out having access to such a wonderful Speech Path! Ster, I have checked in our area for social groups on the "outside" and have had no luck. I do have my son seeing a private Speech Pathologist once a week until our flexible spending runs out. She has experience with autism and AS and is working with him one on one.

Thanks for the comments Schleppenheimer and Ster. I know the children that are in my sons social group are in spec. ed classes with different Dxs (no dx of AS) to which I am not privy to. The counselor does not bring in NT children to interact with the group nor does she observe my son outside of the group. I have scheduled a meeting with her since my last post to discuss the group more and whether she is meeting my sons needs properly. Schleppenheimer, you lucked out having access to such a wonderful Speech Path! Ster, I have checked in our area for social groups on the "outside" and have had no luck. I do have my son seeing a private Speech Pathologist once a week until our flexible spending runs out. She has experience with autism and AS and is working with him one on one.

do you have an autism resource center in your area ?........ours is wonderful and has led us to many resources that we currently use.

Something that could work out as a good social skills situation -- you could have your son as part of a cub scout group when he comes of age for that (I think it's eight years old). You could call ahead and talk to the leader of the group, explaining your son's diagnosis and what the possible problems could be. This way, he gets close contact with "typical" kids, and very probably will have positive social experiences with them.

Also, I HIGHLY recommend acting classes for social skills. The group that my son belongs to is run by a lady who takes in many kids with asperger's, and she is SO understanding. It is amazing. The type of kids who go into acting are often a little more understanding of people with differences anyway, so it's a good fit for people with asperger's.

Kris