School time dillemma again

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I posted this time last year about my son's school problems. Basically, the district was offering to help but the school didn't have to comply. We pulled Pop out for a quarter until we were allowed at another school with an autism clinic. The rest of the year went pretty good with just a few glitches.
Well, this year started great. He got a new special ed teacher who was very adamant about teaching social skills and having a curriculum. He doesn't attend her class, he's just enrolled so he can have a "safety net". He attends regular 2nd grade and his special ed teacher or an aide comes by to check on him during the day. The main "service" he gets are sensory breaks and redirection to focus on the classwork. We have a communication log, only been in use for like 2 weeks (out of 6). This is to help identify patterns of difficulty and triggers so we all know what's going on and can solve problems.

Recently the class size ballooned to 31 (from 21). Pop has been having spells where he is pulled out of class with no explanation. He'll show up in the special ed room and that teacher wouldn't know why. (We have been told that he acts up, doesn't work and distracts other students) We don't get the communication log every day. Sometimes his classwork gets sent home with no explanation. His homework doesn't get turned in. This I've brought up at least 3 times, he needs in-school training and supervision to get him turning in his homework. They agree but no change.
We hear every other week that Pop has a problem with a hall/yard monitor. It's the same one, one that I had an "encounter" with last year. They keep promising to train her. Yet, she punished Pop for merely sitting with a "forbidden" friend at lunchtime. This kid is one of Pop's few friends and they were separated at lunch. Pop was "escorted" out of the cafeteria.

So, I'm perplexed. It's like we talk in circles. They promise stuff and act all agreeable but then nothing happens or somehow those talks are forgotten. I'm wanting to pull him out again. For good. I don't really want to hear any more promises.
My question. Do you think I'm asking for too much? Do you think I'm overreacting?

Although I know some will disagree with me, I cannot bear to put my child through a situation such as this. I did once, and when it didn't work out, I pulled him out and kept him home and homeschooled. Until your child can better understand what is going on at school and make his own demands, etc. I would not send him to school. That's just me.

I know not everyone agrees, and every single child is different. However, I can say that homeschooling has worked and is working great for my son.

Good luck, I know there are no quick and easy fixes and everything we do is only with their best interest at heart.

Thinking of you...

Hi! Im very new to the autism world (still waiting final diagnoses) however not new to schools and there lack of commitment to children with special or extra needs. Im in Australia so not sure how it all works where you are. I was just wondering why he couldn't stay in the special ed class always if this is maybe good for him. Or is there another school that he could go to?
Im seriously thinking about pulling my son out of where he is due to ongoing lack of interest/concern by the school in my sons education.
They have been aware for some time that he has been diagnosed with both adhd and capd and he has repeated this year however the only information that had been passed on to his new teacher was that he was repeating, I didnt say anything because I was assured on the first day of school by the vice principal that his teacher would be told. Ha what a joke. I am treated like a stupid paranoid mother, I have been told that he seems ok, he isnt fighting with the other kids. His teachers words were oh I think I would have noticed if something were wrong, he isn't fighting with the other kids, he does need to be reminded to stop talking, he does wander off into his own world, he does blurt stuff out during mat time and I dont know where he gets his information from, oh and he needs to be reminded to stay on task. Hes a good kid you shouldn't worry ...he is very sensitive tho isnt he. Silly woman. Any way sorry this is your post. Is there someone that can speak to the school with you ie maybe a case worker special ed teacher etc perhaps lay down the law give them an ultimatum pick up their game or your pulling him out. Do they have a detailed list of recommendations for him. Maybe even call in someone from the autism assosiaction to talk to the school. All just suggestions but I'm sure you've thought of them all. Let us know how you go. I guess I have more of the same to look foward to.

Do you think your child is benifiting from being in special ed? From the sound of it he's not, he's being ignored and bullied by everyone in that district, and it's not fair to him. In order to get anything done, you'll have to be much more agrressive, it's Pop's future you're fighting for and this lax attitude isn't cutting it. Bring the attention this situation depands, and get it changed.

I suggest that first you contact the parents of other 'special ed' students, see how many others are being treated in such a way, not just at that school, but also at surrounding. I assure you if you're having trouble, others will be too so don't worry about that. Compare stories and experiances, list them and present them to the school board, demand that the they be addressed. I know it seems melodramatic, but children deserve no less.

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt17479.html

This is last year's dilemma at the other school. Just for reference.

I don't know if you're referring to my having a "lax attitude" or the teachers?
Getting "bullied" is an overstatement. What my complaints are are about making sure he is getting the coaching he needs so he can work in the 2nd grade class. He is not getting worse in terms of his welfare, I'm more worried that he is just wasting his time there.

The problem with getting in touch with the other parents is that 1)I don't have occasion to even meet them. 2)our kids have individual plans so some are "severe" and are in the special ed room all day, while Pop's situation is really unique, he doesn't attend the special ed room for instruction.

I wouldn't say Pop is being ignored but those who are more knowledgeable about autism aren't directly affecting his class activities. So, the psychologist can make suggestions and stuff but she can't stay in his class and train him to turn in his homework or help him complete a writing assignment. Pop is also now resistant to getting special help. He doesn't want to be associated with special ed and so it's not a viable safety net anymore. We're trying to explain to him that it's for coaching, not a punishment. But I'm not sure he sees the difference.

Hi again I dont think your asking to much. Your pops parent and you see the effects all this are having on him. I dont think your lax either. I wrote my last post very late last night and I have reread your post again. ( sorry I went on) If my son is anything to go by the size of pops class will be effecting him in lots of ways. My boy doesnt cope well in crowds. It seems the size of the class may also be effecting his teacher, she cant give him the attention he needs. Perhaps she thinks she is doing the right thing by putting him in the special ed class because she doesnt understand what is going on with him. She needs a lesson in asd's. I can only go by my own son and he wants nothing more than to be just like all the other kids. He hates being singled out. Noone wants a reminder that they are different. If I were pop being sent to a class where perhaps I felt the kids werent as smart or were obviously challenged in some way, I would be resentful. I read some where just recently and I cant recall where about a teacher and her as student. The teacher had put in place with the student and the students mother a system that only they knew of, where by whenever the student looked like they were going off task or being disruptive the teacher would click a fairly loud clicker that she kept in her pocket, this would remind the kid to try to focus or to stop what ever behaviour was happening. The other kids in the class questioned what the noise was for a while but as no explaination came forth they got over it. Apparently this worked really well. Maybe you could suggest something like this to the school, I would also have the autism teacher explain to the hall moniter and his teacher/s that it is not always great to reprimand pop as he may not relise he has done anything wrong. Socially he needs the contact with his forbidden friend to. Or can you sit in the class and see for yourself what is going on? Any way good luck

Update, after all this work and things starting to improve, my son's teacher resigned today. and she didn't even finish report cards. Back to the drawing board. . .

I am so sorry about the teacher resigning -- that really messes things up royally.

Kris

Ditto for everything that whatamess said - we did the same thing and homeschooling is a godsend for our son.

Good Luck in whatever you do!

After some promises and talk, no true change has occurred. Some old issues are being treated like new surprises. The icing on the cake today was getting an email from the teacher saying that it's too late to enter Pop's grades in the district computer system, as she just found them and created his report card. She's his teacher and she waited 2 weeks to find them (his grades).
We're hitting the year anniversary that we pulled Pop out of school. . . .

Maybe you need to have a mini meltdown yourself to get your point across, especially with that stupid hall monitor. They are being slack and they know it and need to see that you are serious about getting your son the help he needs. They are also treating you as if you are dumb enough to believe their fake promises.

Showing one's bad temper is a deal-breaker in dealing with teachers/administration. The game is to out-polite everyone and act cooperative. That forces them to act on your requests. So, last week my husband fired off an angry but professional, polite email to the school psychologist (she administers his IEP). We're going to have a meeting on MOnday.
We've surmised that the special ed teacher is passing the buck and may just be incompetent. But she covers it up by talking a lot and "planning" to do stuff. The former 2nd grade teacher screwed things up royally by quitting suddenly. She had the most contact with Pop and she left before his grades were recorded. But then, the special ed teacher was responsible for that too and she should have maintained some amount of communication so the paperwork could have been done. See, that's the problem. She doesn't follow through and know what Pop needs. She doesn't count him as her student.

i think it's wise to remember that the teacher was given 10 more students, and probably no additional help in this situation~ an overwhelming situation to be thrust in.......i would address concerns over class size to the principal , then whoever is over his head. some districts have class size limits. i would definitely point out things in sort of a before and after manner~ ie; before increase in class size, Pop was getting these services & was doing well because....after increase in class size, Pop experienced decline in functioning level.

The increased class size shouldn't affect the special ed teacher. In fact that highlights the problem. She has 8 students and that hasn't changed. He was enrolled in her class precisely because he'd be one of 8. Actually he should be with the other teacher who covers k-2. But she had a large group so he was placed with the older kids, 3-5 grades. So, he's one of 8 and doesn't require that much attention. She should have a curriculum for him and be on top of his progress. Instead, she is reactive to his behavior and often isn't informed of his activities, triggers or patterns. She claims she didn't know about the 2nd grade class increase until several days after it happened. Even when I bring typical issues up, she "plans" to do something that never gets done.

As far as the 2nd grade teacher goes, she had a teacher assistant and mother helpers. But it does sound like she buckled. Pop claims she left because she couldn't "stand the loud talking". He insists that she told the kids.

It just seems that they're using the special ed room as an alternative to punishing or disciplining after he does something. He's not learning transition skills, not gaining self-help skills (turning in homework, asking for breaks) and not honing his work ethic.