A few more funny stories :)

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***I made sure it was okay with my son, even though he is only 6, to share these stories, lol***

My son (6 years old) was at Great Clips (a hair salon) getting a haircut, and he decided to engage in conversation with the girl who was cutting his hair. He went with his grandmother (my mom), and she tried to indulge in the conversation as well. Every time that she would say something, my son would immediately get quiet and start spacing out, lol. Finally, she took the hint and just didn't say anything else, seeing as he rarely speaks much to people he doesn't know and she didn't want to mess up the opportunity. Anyway, after a few minutes of talking to the girl, he looked at her scissors. "Are those sharp?" he asked, "because they look very sharp." "Yes," she responded of course. He looked at her for a moment, then said very matter-of-factly, "Well, I hope you are very careful with those because I wouldn't want you to cut a hole in the back of my head." She stifled her laughter and responded, "well I will be careful, because I don't want to cut myself either."
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The other day, my daughter (3 years old) was throwing a fit in daycare, not wanting to take a nap. Her teacher kept putting her back in her cot, and my daughter yelled, "I'm telling my mommy!", to which the teacher replied, "Good! Then I can tell her you're being a pain in the butt!" My daughter stopped screaming and looked at her very seriously, then said, "I no hurt your butt."
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The other night, my son overheard me saying that somebody was a good driver... this somebody just happened to almost smack right into my car when I said it. My son asked me if the guy almost hit me because I was the bad driver, to which I immediately had to explain what sarcasm was in detail. After about half an hour, he giggled, and understood why it was funny as well as what I meant. Through the night, he tried a few times to use sarcasm, but it wasn't having much effect with the flat effect of his voice, and I have the same tone in my voice a lot of the time making it hard to clear up the distinction. On the way home from the store, he said, "mommy... you have the most BEAUTIFUL voice." I quickly said "thank you", assuming it was meant to be a compliment due to the lack of intonation, and he responded, "no mommy... that was SARCASM". lol!

"I'm telling my mommy!", to which the teacher replied, "Good! Then I can tell her you're being a pain in the butt!"

Do you know how many times I respond that way with my son?! That's when he's invoking the police or his dad. It really stymies their "threat".
It's like when people are threatened with calling the cops or the boss. The offending person replies, "make sure you spell my name right!"

Good stories!